417 replies to this topic

[catmag]

Childrens shoes!

He's 2 years old and his winter shoes  have just cost £34. The woman at the shop reckons they'll last him "6-8 weeks" Ahahahaaa!

He'll be in them til he needs flip-flops, believe me...

[peasepud]

6-8 weeks? pah little fella has outgrown his before weve left the shop

[McFaul]

Loud women, who think they're more interesting by talking ridiculously loud.  There's some I just feel like saying look you're boring as fuck, speaking as loud as you doesn't make you any more interesting, makes you boring as fuck and fucking annoying.  Women are far more guilty than men of this.  The classic profile is a fat 26 year old lass with 3 kids in a council house who swears more than Joe Kinnear.  We ALL know someone like this, I don't care what you say.

[Monkeys Fist]

One fitting that exact description walked past me today on Leazes Lane.
Not only speaking incredibly loud, but ridiculously fast then trailing of on the last word.
" Ayebutthebitchsaystomethattheyaregonnastopme bennnnerrrrrrfiiiiittts"

If I'd had a gun…

[Idioteque]

whenever someone hears me go into the kitchen, they go into the kitchen spying on what I'm doing

[catmag]

Idioteque, on 24 October 2011 - 10:28 PM, said:

whenever someone hears me go into the kitchen, they go into the kitchen spying on what I'm doing

Why would they do that?

[The Fish]

catmag, on 24 October 2011 - 10:31 PM, said:

Idioteque, on 24 October 2011 - 10:28 PM, said:

whenever someone hears me go into the kitchen, they go into the kitchen spying on what I'm doing

Why would they do that?

He is a known rimmer

[Dr Gloom]

Staying up late posting on here for no reason when I know I'm getting a 5am alarm call from the barn. Why do I do it?

Oh, and people that fart on the tube, and the tube full stop.

[Idioteque]

catmag, on 24 October 2011 - 10:31 PM, said:

Idioteque, on 24 October 2011 - 10:28 PM, said:

whenever someone hears me go into the kitchen, they go into the kitchen spying on what I'm doing

Why would they do that?

After I'd written that I went down to make a buttie and some soup cos I hadn't had any tea yet, I was putting it off till my brother went to bed as I knew he'd do the above, he came in started going on that there was no steak pastys left ( I hadn't touched them) and starting yelling because I was heating soup in a cup in the microwave and it will go all over the microwave (I was covering it)

some people

[sammynb]

Monkeys Fist, on 24 October 2011 - 10:11 PM, said:

One fitting that exact description walked past me today on Leazes Lane.
Not only speaking incredibly loud, but ridiculously fast then trailing of on the last word.
" Ayebutthebitchsaystomethattheyaregonnastopme bennnnerrrrrrfiiiiittts"

If I'd had a gun…

Can I extend that further:

Cunts who loudly talk on their mobile!
People you have two choices - either TALK to the person on the other end of the line or put the phone down and just yell, either way they are still going to hear you, you twat.

[CleeToonFan]

The way everyone has to do a walk when they told on their mobiles too. I can't speak because i'm the same, but as soon as the phone goes off, its some goose step down the room

[Gemmill]

Idioteque, on 24 October 2011 - 10:52 PM, said:

catmag, on 24 October 2011 - 10:31 PM, said:

Idioteque, on 24 October 2011 - 10:28 PM, said:

whenever someone hears me go into the kitchen, they go into the kitchen spying on what I'm doing

Why would they do that?

After I'd written that I went down to make a buttie and some soup cos I hadn't had any tea yet, I was putting it off till my brother went to bed as I knew he'd do the above, he came in started going on that there was no steak pastys left ( I hadn't touched them) and starting yelling because I was heating soup in a cup in the microwave and it will go all over the microwave (I was covering it)

some people

Are you absolutely certain you're not an unknowing retard, and this man is your carer?

[Jonny2J]

[Ant]

alex, on 25 October 2011 - 08:42 AM, said:

People with listening to shit music wearing shit headphones so the whole metro can hear it, usually whilst holding their iPod as if to say "Look, I'm listening to Lady Gaga! Aren't I cool?" No you're not, you fucking cunterhead.

least they're using headphones and not huddled round a mobile phone using the speaker to play steek beats (dodgy dance music all the chav types listen to)
threatened to throw someones phone out a window on the bus a few years back before i was driving

[McFaul]

Cheeky little mugs who are as young as 8 or 9.  Walked out the offy the other week, few bottles of lager in me bag, "how mista giz one o them bottles" a says do one you little mugs, "ye berra giz one before a take them off ye" a had to laugh pmsl nee taller than 4 and a half foot, cheeky little cunt.  You just know they'll have shit lives that type of youngun.

[Ant]

fucking hell

aye ya know they'll still be standing there in 7 years time trying to mug some poor fecker and all

[Armchair Pundit]

• People who approach and go round roundabouts in the wrong lane on purpose to jump traffic queues.
  
• People who drive in the second or third lanes on a motorway when there's nothing in the lanes to the left of them, forcing people to go round them.
  
• Lorries that overtake each other for the sake of 1mph on dual carriageways, blocking all traffic behind them for several miles.
  
• Tailgaters.
  
• People who overtake on blind corners on single carriageway roads.
  
• Lane hoppers in traffic jams.

[sweetleftpeg]

Cashpoints.

The amount of time some people take at them. I mean, for fucks sake, put in your card..put in your pin..check your balance or take some money out. That's it, there is nothing more complicated about them than that. The amount of times I've been behind someone inspecting their balance either on a print out or on screen for 5 minutes is ridiculous. I'm a patient man as well.

Secondly, as this falls into cashpoints as well, queues. They too are easy. Stand a reasonable distance behind the person in front of you. Not by the side of them, not right up their arse. Personal space and all that. This is the one thing that really pisses me off like, especially when you get to a counter and the person behind you is so impatient that they stand next to you and dump their stuff next to yours. Seriously, personal space and all that you rude fuckers.

[CleeToonFan]

sweetleftpeg, on 25 October 2011 - 10:48 AM, said:

Cashpoints.

The amount of time some people take at them. I mean, for fucks sake, put in your card..put in your pin..check your balance or take some money out. That's it, there is nothing more complicated about them than that. The amount of times I've been behind someone inspecting their balance either on a print out or on screen for 5 minutes is ridiculous. I'm a patient man as well.

Secondly, as this falls into cashpoints as well, queues. They too are easy. Stand a reasonable distance behind the person in front of you. Not by the side of them, not right up their arse. Personal space and all that. This is the one thing that really pisses me off like, especially when you get to a counter and the person behind you is so impatient that they stand next to you and dump their stuff next to yours. Seriously, personal space and all that you rude fuckers.

Was stuck behind some bint at a cashpoint for 5 minutes the other week, nearly grabbed her fucking card and did it myself. By the time she finished I'd managed to find out where the "interesting" group of 40 year old women behind me were going out that night. Group of fucking 40 year old single women on a night out and acting like the whole of London would be there trying to lick them out. What an awful sandwich of people to be between.