Leaderboard

So you think Benitez should have persisted player that has openly admitted in the media he didn't want to follow tactical instructions? I'm fucking sure mate

It's not a completely unreasonable stance imo. He's fine to wear it, but not profit from it. Think most clubs would do this

Not sure if I've posted it before but..... Queen Victoria gets shown around the field hospital in some far flung part of the empire to boost the morale of the wounded soldiers, a finely moustachioed Sergeant Major showing her around. (Wails, moans!) QV: "Oh my goodness! What is wrong with this poor fellow?" SM: (Shouting) "Hemorrhoids, Ma'am!" QV: "Oh dear. What is the medical treatment, Sergeant Major?" SM: (Shouting) "Wire brush and dettol, Ma'am! Scrub it out of 'em!" QV: "Oh dear, that sounds very painful. What are your hopes my good man?" Groaning Soldier: "Arrgh! Nnnnnn! To, (gasp) get better and, arghh....fight for Queen and country, your Majesty." QV: "ooh that's so nice of you, here's a medal for your bravery." She pins a medal on his chest and moves to the next bed. (More wails, moans and groans). QV: "Oh my goodness! What is wrong with this poor chap?" SM: (Shouting) "Crabs, Ma'am!" QV: "Oh my goodness. What is the medical treatment, Sergeant Major?" SM: (Shouting) "Wire brush and dettol, Ma'am! Scrub it out of 'em!" QV: "Oh dear, that sounds very painful. What are your hopes my good man?" 2nd Groaning Soldier: "Arrgh! Nnnnnn! To, (gasp) get better and, arghh....fight for Queen and country, your Majesty." QV: "ooh that's so nice of you too! Here's a well deserved medal for your bravery." She then moves on to the end bed and Wee Paddy of the Irish Guards. (More wails, moans and groans). QV: "Oh my goodness! What is wrong with this poor fellow? He doesn't look too well at all!" SM: (Shouting) "Tonsillitis, Ma'am!" QV: "Oh dear. What is the medical treatment, Sergeant Major?" SM: (Shouting) "Wire brush and dettol, Ma'am! Scrub it out of 'em!" QV: "Oh that sounds so very painful. What are your hopes my good man?" Paddy of the Irish Guards: "Arrgh! Nnnnnn! To, (gasp) get, (arrrgh) the wire brush and dettol before them Dorty bastards, Ma'am!"

Bloke walks in to a bakery with a salmon under his arm, ” Do you do fish cakes?” ” No, sorry, we don’t ” says the baker. “ Shame.…” says the bloke, pointing at the Salmon. “It’s his birthday”.