Keefaz

Casino Royale: utter balls. The Boat That Rocked: daft fun. The Da Vinci Code: shit.

Just checked, looks like it. With great power comes great responsibility, David: remember that.

Has Dave broken the Internet?

"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me. I'd fuck me hard."

Fucking over the moon. Thought Michael Owen was superb, really.

Is he even human?

I don't understand. This could be very bad if we bring in the wrong man. Very bad.

"We may even have to ask him to play out of position, but knowing the sort of person he is, I know he would do this." Are we sticking him up front, like?

I would't add that. I came out of that one thinking the same as everyone else: how can we have played so well but lost 4-1? It was insane. As I said in another thread, the Villa match was horrific in terms of performance, the sendings off, the booing of O'Brien, the fight, Taylor's ludicrous handball. Awful.

Sadly, this is true.

It's ridiculous, really, when you consider we're a wealthy club in the Premiership. The likes of Ramage, Huntington, Edgar will probably be lucky if they're playing League 2 football a couple of seasons down the road.

Tbf, he is actually even worse at left-back than he is at centre-half.

This goes without saying, surely?

What? Did he just buy a round?

The standard of passing today made it impossible to keep the ball. It was terrible. Solano, in particular, was very bad but they were all at it.

Remembering that Villa match has actually cheered me up a bit: we were shit today, but we were fucking atrocious that day. At least two of our own players didn't start thumping each other on the pitch.

Let's make no bones about it: Carr and Babayaro are shit. Tonight hasn't erased my memory of some of the crap they've turned in themselves.

If he gives the slightest shit about the fans, they should all get feckin refunds for going along tonight. Poor sods. I was gonna take me dad: Christ, it might've killed him.

We couldve blamed him tbh To make this better, West ham are close to signing Lucas Neil Good, he's shit. Let's get Upson.

Milner was one of the few players who actually managed to retain posession and find a b&w shirt. His crossing was poor, but it often is. He scored a blinder, worked hard, won tackles (unlike his defensive team-mates) and shouldn't get tarnished with the same shitty brush as his woeful colleagues.

Given: 6 Solano: 2 - One of the worst right-back performances I've ever seen. He barely completed a pass all night. Shit. Taylor: 3 - Pathetic. Miles out of position, playing their forwards onside, stupid sending off Ramage: 3 - Dogshit. Huntington: 3 - Fucking rubbish. Milner: 6.5 - Best Newcastle player by a mile, cracking goal, never gave up Dyer: 5 - Rarely on the ball, ran out of steam, couldn't get a grip on the game at all. Tried lots of things that didn't quite come off. Butt: 5 - Very poor by his recent standard of play. Pattison: 3 - Barely a footballer. Slow and shit. Martins: 5.5 - Got close to magic but never quite got there. Support was poor from team-mates Sibs: 5 - for getting kicked in the head twice

Not sure I've ever seen us play worse. Credit to Brum: they succeeded where Spurs failed, imo.

Legend It's that interview that convinced me he probably is 22. He's like a shy bairn.

Decapitation? He only tripped him up.

Bollocks more like. First one, he had to go over to close down Berbatov or he would've been in 1 on 1, and Defoe was offside regardless. Second, I don't see how anyone could've been played offside in the entire build-up. The ball came off Nobby straight to Berbatov who fired it in.