Classy Aussies

[The Fish 8929]

This got the whole of Sydney laughing. Read it and you'll see why! Just

imagine sitting in traffic on your way to work and hearing this. Many

Sydney folks DID hear this on the FOX FM morning show in Sydney .

 

The DJs play a game where they award winners great prizes. The game is

called "Mate Match". The DJs call someone at work and ask if they are

married or seriously involved with someone. If the contestant

answers"yes",he or she is then asked 3 random yet highly personal

questions.

 

The person is also asked to divulge the name of their partner with

(phone number) for verification. If their partner answers those same =

three questions correctly, they both win the prize.

 

One particular game, however, several months ago made the Harbour City

drop to its knees with laughter and is possibly the fu**iest thing

you've heard yet.

 

Anyway, here's how it all went down:

 

 

DJ: "Hey! This is Ed on FOX-FM. Have you ever heard of 'Mate Match'?"

 

 

Contestant: (laughing) "Yes, I have."

 

 

DJ: "Great! Then you know we're giving away a trip to the Gold Coast if

you win.

What is your name? First only please."

 

Contestant: "Brian."

 

 

DJ: "Brian, are you married or what?"

 

 

Brian: (laughing nervously) "Yes, I am married."

 

 

DJ: "Thank you. Now, what is your wife's name? First only please."

 

 

Brian: "Sara."

 

 

DJ: "Is Sara at work, Brian?"

 

 

Brian: "She is gonna kill me."

 

 

DJ: "Stay with me here, Brian! Is she at work?"

 

 

Brian: (laughing) "Yes, she's at work."

 

 

DJ: "Okay, first question - when was the last time you had sex?"

 

 

Brian: "About 8 o'clock this morning."

 

 

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

 

 

Brian: (laughing sheepishly) "Well..."

 

 

DJ: "Question #2 - How long did it last?"

 

 

Brian: "About 10 minutes."

 

 

DJ: "Wow! You really want that trip, huh? No one would ever have said

that if a trip wasn't at stake."

 

Brian: "Yeah, that trip sure would be nice."

 

 

DJ: "Okay. Final question. Where did you have sex at 8 o'clock this =

morning?

 

 

Brian: (laughing hard) "I, ummm, I, well..."

 

 

DJ: "This sounds good, Brian. Where was it at?"

 

 

Brian: "Not that it was all that great, but her mum is staying with us

for couple of weeks..."

 

 

DJ: "Uh huh..."

 

 

Brian: "...and the Mother-In-Law was in the shower at the time."

 

DJ: "Atta boy, Brian."

 

Brian: "On the kitchen table."

 

 

DJ: "Not that great?? That is more adventure than theprevious hundred

times I've done it.

Okay folks, I will put Brian on hold, get his wife's work number and

call her up.

 

 

You listen to this."

[ 3 minutes of commercials follow. ]

 

 

DJ: "Okay audience; let's call Sarah, shall we?" (Touch

tones.....ringing....)

 

 

Clerk: "Kinkos."

 

DJ: "Hey, is Sarah around there somewhere?"

 

Clerk: "This is she."

 

 

DJ: "Sarah, this is Ed with FOX-FM. We are live on the air right now and

I've been talking with Brian for a couple of hours now."

 

Sarah: (laughing) "A couple of hours?"

 

DJ: "Well, a while now. He is on the line with us. Brian knows not to

give any\answers away or you'll lose.

Sooooooo... do you know the rules of 'Mate Match'?"

 

Sarah: "No."

 

DJ: "Good!"

 

 

Brian: (laughing)

 

 

Sarah: (laughing) "Brian, what the hell are you up to?"

 

 

Brian: (laughing) "Just answer his questions honestly, okay? Be

completely honest."

 

 

DJ: "Yeah yeah yeah. Sure. Now, I will ask you 3 questions, Sarah. If

your answers match Brian's answers, then the both of youwill be off to

the Gold Coast for 5 days on us.

 

 

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

 

DJ: "Alright. When did you last have sex, Sarah?"

 

Sarah: "Oh God, Brian....uh, this morning before Brian went to work."

 

 

DJ: "What time?"

 

Sarah: "Around 8 this morning."

 

DJ: "Very good. Next question. How long did it last?"

 

 

Sarah: "12, 15 minutes maybe."

 

DJ: "Hmmmm. That's close enough. I am sure she is trying to protect is

manhood. We've got one last question, Sarah. You are one question away

from a trip to the Gold Coast. Are you ready?"

 

 

Sarah: (laughing) "Yes."

 

 

DJ: "Where did you have it?"

 

 

Sarah: "OH MY GOD, BRIAN!! You didn't tell them that did you?"

 

 

Brian: "Just tell him, honey."

 

 

DJ: "What is bothering you so much, Sarah?"

 

 

Sarah: "Well..."

 

 

DJ: Come on Sarah.....where did you have it?

 

 

Sarah: "Up the arse....."

[duckerDavies 0]

[sammynb 2929]

Fish as mildly amusing as it is to laugh at our dumb arse population, there is just a problem or two.

1. Brian never gets any arse.

2. Everyone knows Sarah takes it in the arse.

3. There isn't a radio station in Sydney called FOX, you arse!

 

 

By the way try snopes this "incident" is like an urban myth.

[The Fish 8929]

I care not a jot for your lies samuel, we all know you antipodeans are uncultured yobs.

 

[sammynb 2929]

I care not a jot for your lies samuel, we all know you antipodeans are uncultured yobs.

 

Just like our English heritage Dave my boy.

[The Fish 8929]

I care not a jot for your lies samuel, we all know you antipodeans are uncultured yobs.

 

Just like our English heritage Dave my boy.

piffle

[sammynb 2929]

Just have another baby sham Davey and all will be fine.

[wellsy 0]

One of them forwarded on emails no doubt just with a title change to aussies instead of yanks et al. Anyways i dont care, i think that was hilarious!

[Holden McGroin 4794]

I heard this about 5-8 years ago. Was funny though.

[Guest alex]

Older than Rob W in its various guises