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Wiping your arse


Holden McGroin
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I used to stand untill i discovered the joys of sitting. I basically go to the bog for a bit of a rest and a read so standing up tends to ruin the experience. I also find that sitting down keeps the cheeks slightly splayed allowing extra purchase on my ring to minimise winnets etc. I sit down, i'm not proud of it but i am proud of my spanking clean ring piece.

 

There, i said it.

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Isn't standing how kids get taught when they are being trained to use the bog, on the assumption that they'll realise that they're not supposed to continue this on into adulthood. Can't believe some of you are still giving it the Ski Sunday well into your 30s. :unsure:

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I stay sitting. I don't see how doing this task in this manner confuses people.

 

Ditto. If nothing else, shitting then standing up just seems comical. :unsure:

 

I'm with you on that, in fact the only time I ever stand after having shit is if I have had a particularly difficult shit and need to remove my top and hang it on the back of the door as I'm sweating like a rapist due to the pressure I've put my poor ring under.

 

And I wipe back to front too, doesn't everyone? And btw, my ball bag isn't caked in shit either before you's ask!!

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Guest James_coDurham
I stay sitting. I don't see how doing this task in this manner confuses people.

 

Ditto. If nothing else, shitting then standing up just seems comical. :unsure:

 

I'm with you on that, in fact the only time I ever stand after having shit is if I have had a particularly difficult shit and need to remove my top and hang it on the back of the door as I'm sweating like a rapist due to the pressure I've put my poor ring under.

 

And I wipe back to front too, doesn't everyone? And btw, my ball bag isn't caked in shit either before you's ask!!

 

Or if the toilet roll is a wee bit out of reach.

 

The thought of any adult human being getting up from the toilet seat with a shitty arse makes me cringe, dirty fuckers.

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I stay sitting. I don't see how doing this task in this manner confuses people.

 

Ditto. If nothing else, shitting then standing up just seems comical. :finger:

 

I'm with you on that, in fact the only time I ever stand after having shit is if I have had a particularly difficult shit and need to remove my top and hang it on the back of the door as I'm sweating like a rapist due to the pressure I've put my poor ring under.

 

And I wipe back to front too, doesn't everyone? And btw, my ball bag isn't caked in shit either before you's ask!!

 

Or if the toilet roll is a wee bit out of reach.

 

The thought of any adult human being getting up from the toilet seat with a shitty arse makes me cringe, dirty fuckers.

 

Strangely I position the toilet roll holder and toilet roll within my reach when sitting!!

 

Your mother stands post shit, turns around, then squats on your fatha's face so he can get his dinner! :unsure:

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Was pondering over this when having my early morning ritual. You know sometimes when you nip one off and wipe you just ready yourself to flush and realise you have a straggler. So, you relax again and hurry along the final push and then rewipe.

 

Those of you who stand and wipe must be must be all over the place. Also, if you stand, how to you stop your butt cheeks closing together causing some overspill? Or is the stand stance more as if there was an imaginary horse under you?

 

Far easier and less hazardous to just raise a cheek like.

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Standers taking a right slating in this thread and wrongly so. Sitters are basically evolutionary stragglers from when we used to crouch down and bury our own shit tbh and that is scientific FACT!

 

Theres no doubt the standers have the moral high ground so it's time to show it by not 'rising' to it any more. Time to turn the other cheek tbh.

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