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Worst ever NUFC team


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Thank fuck we never signed Gullit or Van Basten circa '88. Imagine having gone down (or not, it wouldnt really have mattered) and having had to sell them to another English club for a pittance and then watch them proceed to take the p!ss for Liverpool, Tottenham or Man U for the next 10 years...no thanks.

:hiya: Couple of years before that I think. It was never going to happen with our board back then anyway.

 

Yeah was gonna say it would have had to have been a few years before that because by '88 they'd already laid Europe to waste in the Championships and made us look even dafter than our new press-stud tops already did.

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Btw, Chris Guthrie recommended Van Basten and Gullit to NUFC when they were both still playing in Holland.

I didn't know that but I remember Gullit came close to signing for Ipswich and Arsenal.

That's what he told me and my Dad anyway. The club weren't interested :hiya:

I remember in 87/88 there were rumours we were going to sign Maradona :lol: They brung out a new newspaper about the toon called "United" and the headline on the front page was "NO guarantees about Maradona but....."

Says it all really. I can remember when Leeds were after him too. Top PL clubs wouldn't be out of the running for the likes of him now I suppose. No chance back then though for the clubs in the English top fligh.

 

I knew a kid at University who was a Sheff U fan. He reckoned when they signed Alex Sabella (78ish) they were offered a 16 yr old Maradona but the board hadn't heard of him so didn't bother - smacks of urban myth but still quite funny.

It's true.

 

Of course it is.

As guaranteed as Baines to toon :lol:

By the way Barry, how old are you now? Late forties? Or as old as Leaze?

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Ok to lighten the mood a little bit (perhaps) here is my team which i think could give any side in the conference a run for their money (i've probably missed a few so feel free to add)

 

Keeping it tight at the back we've got Hooper in goal, being protected by Bramble, Boumsong, Marcelinho and Craig Moore.

 

In midfield we've got a blend of youth and experience, with Fumaca playing in the hole backed up by Amdy Faye and Maric on the flanks.

 

Upfront I've gone for the dead eye trio of Ameobi, Anderson and Luque which is sure to have the big 3 conceding the title right away.

 

On the bench:

 

Lionel Perez

Gary Caldwell

Alain Goma

Carl Cort

Andreas Anderson

 

Andreas Anderson have a split personality or something? :hiya:

 

Quite amazed that with all the loan signings mentioned that no-one has dragged the name of Paul Moran up. On loan from Spurs, mates with Gascoigne (say no more) who took him out on the town on the Friday night before the match....

 

He was still fucking pissed come kick-off. Jim Smith gave him 45 minutes before promptly telling him to fuck off back to London.

 

The shittest of all the shite tbh

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Ok to lighten the mood a little bit (perhaps) here is my team which i think could give any side in the conference a run for their money (i've probably missed a few so feel free to add)

 

Keeping it tight at the back we've got Hooper in goal, being protected by Bramble, Boumsong, Marcelinho and Craig Moore.

 

In midfield we've got a blend of youth and experience, with Fumaca playing in the hole backed up by Amdy Faye and Maric on the flanks.

 

Upfront I've gone for the dead eye trio of Ameobi, Anderson and Luque which is sure to have the big 3 conceding the title right away.

 

On the bench:

 

Lionel Perez

Gary Caldwell

Alain Goma

Carl Cort

Andreas Anderson

 

Andreas Anderson have a split personality or something? :hiya:

 

Quite amazed that with all the loan signings mentioned that no-one has dragged the name of Paul Moran up. On loan from Spurs, mates with Gascoigne (say no more) who took him out on the town on the Friday night before the match....

 

He was still fucking pissed come kick-off. Jim Smith gave him 45 minutes before promptly telling him to fuck off back to London.

 

The shittest of all the shite tbh

Can you not read Craig?

 

We've had so many bad players, Fumaca would be up there with people we had in Division Two, he used to do step overs with no one around him for twenty yards then pass it to the invisible man and out of play. The worst I've ever seen in a black and white shirt was Paul Moran, we had him on loan from Spurs he only played a few games, but I remember one game at home he missed THREE open goals, he was the epitome of shit, he was the Sima of a football field, couldn't run, finish, control or pass. He's the worst I've seen. Worst captain? Kevin Dillon hands down, I remember we played the match against the mackems on the windiest day I can ever remember it was about 80 miles an hour gales, game should never have been played, he was clean through by 15 yards from the half way line, but by the time he got to the 18 yard box he was so slow the whole Sunderland defence caught up with him.

 

 

Of course it is.

As guaranteed as Baines to toon :lol:

By the way Barry, how old are you now? Late forties? Or as old as Leaze?

See when I went to Thailand everywhere you went you'd have kids in fake Arsenal tops trying to sell you postcards, there'd be 10 of them in front of you, making such a fuckin din and you'd almost end up trampling on them, they were desperate to be heard but no one was listening till I lost my temper and just said FUCK OFFFFFFFF YOU IRRITATING LITTLE CUNTS!

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Of course it is.

As guaranteed as Baines to toon :hiya:

By the way Barry, how old are you now? Late forties? Or as old as Leaze?

See when I went to Thailand everywhere you went you'd have kids in fake Arsenal tops trying to sell you postcards, there'd be 10 of them in front of you, making such a fuckin din and you'd almost end up trampling on them, they were desperate to be heard but no one was listening till I lost my temper and just said FUCK OFFFFFFFF YOU IRRITATING LITTLE CUNTS!

 

So seeing it was fashionable to fuck Thai boys in the 1980s and early 90s, that would make you as old as Leaze, no?

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I missed that bit - soz Stevie :hiya:

Areet :lol: To be fair I was totally unaware about his drinking escapades with Gazza, explains how he was so shit, having said that I doubt he'd have been anything better than utter pish with no drink on board.

 

Fucking Gazza eh? Remember he "recommended" us to sign someone else from Spurs, Peter Garland, I don't think he ever played for the first team. I bet Stimson was on Gazza's recommendation as well, oh dear.

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I tell you someone no one has mentioned yet, and it might seem a bit considering he's rated as one of the best forwards in Britain over the last 35 years, but Ian Rush at Newcastle would seriously make my worst ever eleven and that's honest. It was painful watching him, and when Dalglish insisted on playing him midfield oh dear, he retired 4 years too late in my opinion.

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I tell you someone no one has mentioned yet, and it might seem a bit considering he's rated as one of the best forwards in Britain over the last 35 years, but Ian Rush at Newcastle would seriously make my worst ever eleven and that's honest. It was painful watching him, and when Dalglish insisted on playing him midfield oh dear, he retired 4 years too late in my opinion.

 

 

John Barnes :hiya:

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I tell you someone no one has mentioned yet, and it might seem a bit considering he's rated as one of the best forwards in Britain over the last 35 years, but Ian Rush at Newcastle would seriously make my worst ever eleven and that's honest. It was painful watching him, and when Dalglish insisted on playing him midfield oh dear, he retired 4 years too late in my opinion.

 

 

John Barnes :hiya:

Barnes wasn't that bad, he actually finished top scorer, he scored a mint goal at West Ham, and that header at home to Southampton was canny. If he wasn't such a fat cunt I reckon Barnes, could've went on longer. He was quality against Barca as well, and was our best player away in the Nou Camp.

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Has Gavilan been mentioned yet? He came on as sub for Nobby near the end of a match late in the season and I think everybody had high hopes for him as he looked quite decent in that brief appearance.

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For me worst team Ive seen play for us would include..

 

GK:Hardwick

LB:Stimson...seems to be making decent start as manager mind :hiya:

 

CH:Serrant

CH:Marcelino

RB:Charvet

MID:Heard..the epitome of shitness

MID:Megson :lol:

W:Fereday

W:Stewart

CF:Mcdonald..Ronald sorry Rob,not Malcolm

CF:Mitchell..aussie sack of crap we had briefly, goddamn awful.

 

Notable mentions also to, Ameobi..yes he is that bad!, Des Hamilton,Shitehurst,Pingel,Hooper,Maric,Mcdonough (sp),Roy Aitken...oh fuck it theres hundreds.. :lol:

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