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Fat waste of space, tactically inept cabbage head Steve Bruce sacked by Newcastle United


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15 minutes ago, ewerk said:

Running :lol: 

:lol::lol: Of the old school variety as well. 

 

I hate this “Steve has been appointed it’s done and dusted” shite that keeps being repeated, as if we should all just go “ah well nowt to complain about now let’s get behind Steve and Colback”, imagine if we treat everything like that :lol: 

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4 minutes ago, Ayatollah Hermione said:

Not sure what's more embarrassing tbh. Poundland or Moncur.

 

One's a purveyor of cheap shite, the other is a chain of discount stores

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Brucie's bonus press conference

 

Lee Marshall: "OK folks, you know the drill, no takeover questions, no Mike Ashley questions and keep it clean, please, after all, we aren't Joe Kinnear! OK, Newcastle United manager....Steve Bruce!"

 

Steve Bruce: "Hi everyone, pleased to meet you all again."

 

Chris Waugh: "Hi Steve, how does...."

 

Knight Ryder: "Cough, fucking cough!.....(glares at Waugh)....Welcome to the Toon, Brucey. Trinity Mirror regional sports writer of the year, Lee Ryder here, How does it feel to be back wor kid?"

 

SB: "It feels great to be honest, I've always loved Newcastle as they were my boyhood club. Growing up as a Geordie it was my dream to play for them. In fact I can't think of anyone in here more Geordie than myself to be honest with you! Hahaha."

 

Knight Ryder: "What aboot me? Ah was a toon army footsoldier long before ah was a shit hot award winning sports journalist. Are you more Geordie than me?"

 

SB: "Where you from, son?"

 

Knight Ryder: "Seaton Delaval."

 

SB: "Hahaha. I'm definitely more Geordie than you, sonna. I'm from Daisy Hill in Walker, as a kid if you were on a bike it was either stolen or in danger of being stolen. We weren't poshies from the coast!"

 

Luke Edwards: "Is it true you personally transformed the career of a young Andy Robertson, the Liverpool full back and Klopp has you to thank for Liverpool's fantastic champions league winning season?"

 

SB: "Well that's very kind of you, Luke....."

 

Knight Ryder: "So how many times did you wag it from school then, Walker hardman?"

 

Lee Marshall: "One at a time, please gentleman!"

 

SB: "Well, ah helped Andy out but I'm sure Jurgen had a bit to do with it as well. Also ah wagged it about twenty times."

 

Knight Ryder: "Twenty? Is that it? Ah wagged it about thirty times all through school, wor kid. How's that Geordie asseseman, err, assismin, err working going now, like?"

 

SB: "Twenty times in just the 2nd year of Benfield school, kidda."

 

John Carver: "ARE YOU MORE G...G...GEORDIE THAN ME! EH? AHLL TEK ANY CUNT ON! (HIC!) FUCK YIZ AHLL. AH SHOULD BE UP THERE, (HIC), UP THERE!"

 

LM: "Hi security! Lee Marshall here, can someone please escort JC back down to the kitchens, please. Think he's been siphoning off the guests whisky again. Cheers."

 

George Caulkin: "How much of the decision to take the job was based on your parents being from here?"

 

SB: "Well it played a part, I couldn't have....."

 

Knight Ryder: "That was just in the juniors! Twenty times in the juniors! Ask Mala, he'll tell ya!"

 

SB: "Err, I couldn't have made it without the support of my folks."

 

Keith Downie: "Understand reports say that Mike Ashley will give you a £100M war chest. How much was his backing and steadying the ship as well as being a sound businessman a factor in you taking the job?"

 

SB: "Obviously a big part but I've full control of the club transfers and everything."

 

Lee Marshall: "Sorry, everyone..... (Whispers).....Steve, Lee Charnley says he'll agree to a pay-as-you-play deal for Carroll and that's all you can have. Carr's doing the rest."

 

SB: "For fucks sake, err, I mean Lee charnley's trying to get a couple of my targets as we speak. Hopefully can get them over the line."

 

Lee Marshall: "Ok folks, that's it for today, well see you next time."

 

Knight Ryder: "How many tabs did you smoke at school, then? Eh? Eh How many....?"

 

Lee Marshall: "Sorry, Lee, that's all for now."

 

Knight Ryder: "Laters."

 

 

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I think it was a brilliant decision for beloved Mr. Ashley to hire a Geordie.

I think Mr. Charnley was brilliant assisting Mr. Ashley in hiring a Geordie.

I think Mr. Bruce, the Geordie, will surely bring feelings of some magnitude to every supporter home or abroad.

I think, deeply, we should applaud Mr. Ashley & Mr. Charnley for their astuteness in hiring a Geordie.

I do think I have exhausted my plan to tell anymore terminologicalinexactitudes.

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Sheffield Wednesday have reported Newcastle United to the Premier League over its conduct regarding the appointment of Bruce 

Edited by trooper
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1 hour ago, trooper said:

Sheffield Wednesday have reported Newcastle United to the Premier League over its conduct regarding the appointment of Bruce 

 

Yes they’re saying we should have been after a decent manager instead of Bruce

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The whole ‘Bruce needs to be given a chance’ bollocks being trotted out by lick spittle hacks and club reps alike is as disingenuous as it is lazy. It’s not about the manager, it’s about not giving the owner yet another chance. Take Benitez out the equation (and he approached the club anyway at a time when they were desperate) and every managerial appointment post-Keegan has been someone the owner thought would be so happy and desperate to get the job that they’d do exactly as they were told. That’s why anyone with a modicum of common sense sees right through the ‘fresh start’ rhetoric. It’s just more of the same old shit 

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I've got nowt against Bruce, his departure from Sheffield Wednesday might be unsavoury but he obviously believes beyond everyone else that he can be a success. Before we have even kicked a ball we've all condemned him including myself. He sounds like a decent bloke, I haven't heard a bad word against him as a person, just that he's not what we need at this time. Ashley has absolutely set him up as a buffer to take the flak. Rafa was Teflon and the fans rightly supported him, directing any abuse straight at Ashley and Charnley. 

Bruce however, will be scrutinised by the media and the fans from the off. We will all be saying told you so and no doubt he will get dogs abuse from the stands. Yes, he knows what he is letting himself in for, but his appointment is subterfuge for Ashley, having a puppet at the reigns who won't criticise him in pressers, who will stand there taking it game after game when things go badly and will inevitably be the fall guy when it finally unravels.

Boycott Arsenal needs to turn into Boycott Watford, Boycott Brighton, Boycott Man Utd and beyond before Ashley gets it into his dumb skull that he cannot continue to treat the fanbase with such contempt and still take a profit. I suspect this season will be interesting for all the wrong reasons, least of all the football. 

 

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17 minutes ago, Chaser said:

I've got nowt against Bruce, his departure from Sheffield Wednesday might be unsavoury but he obviously believes beyond everyone else that he can be a success. Before we have even kicked a ball we've all condemned him including myself. He sounds like a decent bloke, I haven't heard a bad word against him as a person.

 

 

Depends who you ask, some might suggest that the former Sheffield Wednesday, sheffield United, Aston villa, Birmingham and Sunderland manager, who now manages Newcastle might have a loyalty problem.

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3 minutes ago, Alex said:

He’s a shit manager who has been hired to replace one the best managers we've ever had who was pushed out of the club by the owner. The rest is irrelevant 

 

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  • Andrew changed the title to Fat waste of space, tactically inept cabbage head Steve Bruce sacked by Newcastle United

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