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You just really couldnt make it up


Amir
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"KEVIN KEEGAN could make a sensational return to Newcastle if a Dubai tycoon succeeds with a £100million bid for the troubled club.

 

And managing director Derek Llambias last night insisted the club could have new owners within the next WEEK.

 

The latest twist in the Toon saga emerged as Newcastle drew 0-0 with Leeds in front of just 16,000 fans at St James' Park - and 5,000 of those were supporting the visitors.

 

It was a far cry from the days when the football-mad Geordies would turn up in their thousands just to welcome a new player.

 

Such was the ]gloomy air around the eerily-silent ground, club officials even had crowd cheers played through the Tannoy system when the players came out.

 

But an upbeat Llambias claimed to be dealing with several interested parties, including Sirous Mahjoob who wants to install Keegan - and NOT Alan Shearer - as manager.

 

Llambias confirmed he is ready to meet Mahjoob in the next few days but that alternative deals are on the table.

 

It means the end is in sight for controversial owner Mike Ashley, whose £240m investment in the Toon has been a nightmare, culminating in relegation to the Championship.

 

Llambias said: "We are dealing with several people and giving most of our time and attention to the sale.

 

"You must remember that some parties make offers but when it comes to putting up proof of funds they are a long way from sealing a deal.

 

"But I can say we are very close to completing a deal and it could happen next week."

 

On Tuesday, the Singapore-based Profitable Group, fronted by ex-Liverpool star Steve McMahon, pulled out.

 

Whatever happens, it seems that caretaker-boss Chris Hughton will be in charge of Newcastle's opening clash at West Brom on Saturday week because there simply will not be time for new owners to appoint their own man.

 

Llambias added: "It's Catch 22 - anyone who signs a deal will want their own choice of manager.

 

"Look what happened when Mike took over, Sam Allardyce was already in place and he didn't want him."

 

One of Mahjoob's intentions is to use the club as a global advertising vehicle for a new information website.

 

Should his £100m offer be successful he promises to hand over £40m for new players.

 

His spokesman said: "The money is there. Mr Mahjoob has a healthy interest in football and is bidding to take over an ailing club with a great worldwide reputation.

 

"He envisages a clean sweep with Kevin Keegan coming back as manager, this time with his own staff and control of players.

 

"Last time Keegan inherited a lot of people he didn't necessarily want and we don't want the same situation again.

 

"He has nothing against Shearer. He just thinks Keegan retains greater global appeal."

 

Last night's game highlighted how far the club have fallen - 13 years to the day after Shearer joined from Blackburn.

 

Their expensive team of misfits was out-passed in the first half, with Leeds midfielder Fabian Delph looking head and shoulders above the opposition.

 

Joey Barton decided he had been made to look foolish once too often and took out Delph with a body check.

 

Obafemi Martins was not among the subs, paving the way for his £7.5m move to German club Wolfsburg."

 

Ive never heard of this man, Mahjoob. Looks like some sort of made up bullshit by The Sun again. Looks fake tho, Stopped reading at 45m for new players. No chance.

Edited by Amir
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Jesus wept, so the Ronnie calls for them to come clean and give us information and the next thing you know, Dekka is out here saying as much stuff as he can make up.

 

What happened to confidentiality clauses? what happened to the day (only a couple of weeks ago) when Dekka and Mike didnt know who bidders were as all of this was, quite rightly being handled by Seymour Pierce?

 

Now the daft fucker is so desperate to shut us all up hes making up so much bollocks and what he thinks we want to hear that hes managing to look even more ridiculous by the minute.

 

Just give us the truth, when people ask to be told whats happening, thats what we want not to be reassured with random bollocks. Its like asking the NHS to reassure us about swine flu, instead of saying its not very nice but give it a few days and 99% of those that get it will be feeling fine they tell us that its a bit like winning the lottery and every morning you'll wake up with this beautiful feeling of euphoria and the smell of roses in the air.

 

 

This story is shit, its shit for so many reasons its hard to keep count but the big, sooopadoopa whopper and proof as far as Im concerned is this statement "Last time Keegan inherited a lot of people he didn't necessarily want and we don't want the same situation again. He has nothing against Shearer. He just thinks Keegan retains greater global appeal."

 

So why sell Martins? why suddenly decide that the transfer embargo is no more when we're "a week away" from a sale to a man who will install a manager who didnt appear to have any problem with Martins the last time he managed us?

 

 

 

You know what really, really boils my piss about this lot? on top of all the shit, all the ridiculous decisions, the grinding of our football club into the ground, the way they manage to fuck everything up. Its the fact that they think we're so stupid as to not put two and two together and get an answer thats somewhere in single figures.

 

 

That picture of him as Comical Ali couldnt be much closer to the truth and the Sun is so desperate to rip us apart that its willing to print this shit.

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Jesus wept, so the Ronnie calls for them to come clean and give us information and the next thing you know, Dekka is out here saying as much stuff as he can make up.

 

What happened to confidentiality clauses? what happened to the day (only a couple of weeks ago) when Dekka and Mike didnt know who bidders were as all of this was, quite rightly being handled by Seymour Pierce?

 

Now the daft fucker is so desperate to shut us all up hes making up so much bollocks and what he thinks we want to hear that hes managing to look even more ridiculous by the minute.

 

Just give us the truth, when people ask to be told whats happening, thats what we want not to be reassured with random bollocks. Its like asking the NHS to reassure us about swine flu, instead of saying its not very nice but give it a few days and 99% of those that get it will be feeling fine they tell us that its a bit like winning the lottery and every morning you'll wake up with this beautiful feeling of euphoria and the smell of roses in the air.

 

 

This story is shit, its shit for so many reasons its hard to keep count but the big, sooopadoopa whopper and proof as far as Im concerned is this statement "Last time Keegan inherited a lot of people he didn't necessarily want and we don't want the same situation again. He has nothing against Shearer. He just thinks Keegan retains greater global appeal."

 

So why sell Martins? why suddenly decide that the transfer embargo is no more when we're "a week away" from a sale to a man who will install a manager who didnt appear to have any problem with Martins the last time he managed us?

 

 

 

You know what really, really boils my piss about this lot? on top of all the shit, all the ridiculous decisions, the grinding of our football club into the ground, the way they manage to fuck everything up. Its the fact that they think we're so stupid as to not put two and two together and get an answer thats somewhere in single figures.

 

 

That picture of him as Comical Ali couldnt be much closer to the truth and the Sun is so desperate to rip us apart that its willing to print this shit.

 

Not sure this is even a genuine article PP

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Not sure this is even a genuine article PP

 

So where did the quote come from originally? haway maaaaan, it was 5 in the morning and I was getting worked up over something that wasnt even real???? :)

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If nothing else, this whole episode has reinforced to me that most journalists are a bunch of cunts who make the news up. What happened to just reporting the damn news?

 

Fuck me, if there is no news to be had they'll just invent a story themselves and then have the bare-faced cheek to ask people to buy their paper. I seriously dont trust a word any of them say any more. If any of them are reading this forum (and I know they must be because they get half of their stories from here) then you can all fuck off. Joe Kinnear was a muppet but he had it right about journalists. JUST PRINT THE FUCKING TRUTH!!!!!

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This story is shit, its shit for so many reasons its hard to keep count but the big, sooopadoopa whopper and proof as far as Im concerned is this statement "Last time Keegan inherited a lot of people he didn't necessarily want and we don't want the same situation again. He has nothing against Shearer. He just thinks Keegan retains greater global appeal."

 

So why sell Martins? why suddenly decide that the transfer embargo is no more when we're "a week away" from a sale to a man who will install a manager who didnt appear to have any problem with Martins the last time he managed us?

 

It wasn't Manboob's spokesman who came out with that statement, not Llabia.

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The latest twist in the Toon saga emerged as Newcastle drew 0-0 with Leeds in front of just 16,000 fans at St James' Park

 

:)

 

Like any other Championship could draw that for a friendly.

 

There's Premier league clubs that struggle to beat it for proper games.

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http://www.arabianbusiness.com/563375-excl...castle-utd-deal

 

EXCLUSIVE: Iranian tycoon close to Newcastle Utd deal

 

Iranian businessman Sirous Mahjoob on Thursday confirmed that he is in the final stages of negotiations to buy English football club Newcastle United.

 

In an interview with Iranian news agency ILNA, the UAE-based tycoon said that he hoped the deal would help to strengthen Iranian football.

 

“My purpose in buying Newcastle is to help Iranian football,” he said.

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http://www.arabianbusiness.com/563375-excl...castle-utd-deal

 

EXCLUSIVE: Iranian tycoon close to Newcastle Utd deal

 

Iranian businessman Sirous Mahjoob on Thursday confirmed that he is in the final stages of negotiations to buy English football club Newcastle United.

 

In an interview with Iranian news agency ILNA, the UAE-based tycoon said that he hoped the deal would help to strengthen Iranian football.

 

“My purpose in buying Newcastle is to help Iranian football,” he said.

 

The endgame.

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