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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

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I can better that....

 

When the missus was in labour with our first we got the the maternity department, jumped in the lift and the fucker got stuck! Contractions were less than 3 minutes apart by the time it got moving again! :naughty:

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I can better that....

 

When the missus was in labour with our first we got the the maternity department, jumped in the lift and the fucker got stuck! Contractions were less than 3 minutes apart by the time it got moving again!  :naughty:

54445[/snapback]

 

Aye but the worst of it was she was stuck in there with you.

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

I've got a vision of you doing a lumbering version of the Indiana Jones roll between the doors. :naughty: Sticking your hand back through as the doors slammed to grab your files. :huh:

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Guest alex
So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

You were keyed in though, right?

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

Next weeks newsletter:

 

''SLP in 'rubbish' version of Towering Inferno'' tbh. :naughty:

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I can better that....

 

When the missus was in labour with our first we got the the maternity department, jumped in the lift and the fucker got stuck! Contractions were less than 3 minutes apart by the time it got moving again!  :huh:

54445[/snapback]

 

Aye but the worst of it was she was stuck in there with you.

54447[/snapback]

 

Totally agree - it was me that was bricking it, she was calm as anything...

:naughty:

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

I've got a vision of you doing a lumbering version of the Indiana Jones roll between the doors. :naughty: Sticking your hand back through as the doors slammed to grab your files. :huh:

54448[/snapback]

 

The files are still trapped I'm afraid. I did want to grab them but my boss went a bit Hollywood on me 'Quick! Quick! Run man run!'

 

Yes, I was keyed in. :D

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

I've got a vision of you doing a lumbering version of the Indiana Jones roll between the doors. :naughty: Sticking your hand back through as the doors slammed to grab your files. :huh:

54448[/snapback]

 

The files are still trapped I'm afraid. I did want to grab them but my boss went a bit Hollywood on me 'Quick! Quick! Run man run!'

 

Yes, I was keyed in. :D

54459[/snapback]

 

 

Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

I've got a vision of you doing a lumbering version of the Indiana Jones roll between the doors. :naughty: Sticking your hand back through as the doors slammed to grab your files. :D

54448[/snapback]

 

The files are still trapped I'm afraid. I did want to grab them but my boss went a bit Hollywood on me 'Quick! Quick! Run man run!'

 

Yes, I was keyed in. :yes

54459[/snapback]

 

 

Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

54461[/snapback]

 

:huh:

 

An impromptu waxing as the doors slammed shut?

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Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

54461[/snapback]

 

I know, we don't usally get that on a Wednesday. :naughty:

 

He also did the 'Quick...can't...hold...the...doors...much...longer...'

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Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

54461[/snapback]

 

I know, we don't usally get that on a Wednesday. :huh:

 

He also did the 'Quick...can't...hold...the...doors...much...longer...'

54466[/snapback]

 

Five minutes ago I had you down as the hero of this story. Now it transpires that that was your boss and you were just the silly fucker that needed saving. :naughty:

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So, I'm grabbing some files from the basment to start archiving when the bastid lift decides it can't be arsed for the doors to open or to move to any other floor ever. 30 minutes I've just been stuck. My so called caring colleagues ringing me to play eye fucking spy. Very funny, yes. Worse till I tried to open the doors myself which set a an annoying bastid alarm off.

 

I eventually escaped after my boss managed to  wedge open the doors with 3 screwdrivers (ingenious) and I darted out Indiana Jones stylee.

 

Still, I got payed. Although I'm a bit embarrassed about taking a shit in there.

54438[/snapback]

 

I've got a vision of you doing a lumbering version of the Indiana Jones roll between the doors. :naughty: Sticking your hand back through as the doors slammed to grab your files. :D

54448[/snapback]

 

The files are still trapped I'm afraid. I did want to grab them but my boss went a bit Hollywood on me 'Quick! Quick! Run man run!'

 

Yes, I was keyed in. :yes

54459[/snapback]

 

 

Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

54461[/snapback]

 

:huh:

 

An impromptu waxing as the doors slammed shut?

54465[/snapback]

 

Had to act fast. Trapped in the lift with a brazillian clutching a bomb tbh.

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Shaved your pubes off? Seems like a bit of an extreme reaction.

54461[/snapback]

 

I know, we don't usally get that on a Wednesday. :D

 

He also did the 'Quick...can't...hold...the...doors...much...longer...'

54466[/snapback]

 

Five minutes ago I had you down as the hero of this story. Now it transpires that that was your boss and you were just the silly fucker that needed saving. :huh:

54471[/snapback]

 

I never hinted at anything else! Although I did help matters my coincidentally having some lube with me...for...erm...anyway, it helped with the door. :naughty:

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I have visions of sweetleftpeg resembling the guy of the Mr Muscles advert, with him not been able to open the lift doors

54488[/snapback]

 

 

The lift was fine, the buttons were a bit stiff for him....

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Guest alex
I have visions of sweetleftpeg resembling the guy of the Mr Muscles advert, with him not been able to open the lift doors

54488[/snapback]

 

 

The lift was fine, the buttons were a bit stiff for him....

54489[/snapback]

Bit high for him actually :naughty:

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I have visions of sweetleftpeg resembling the guy of the Mr Muscles advert, with him not been able to open the lift doors

54488[/snapback]

 

 

The lift was fine, the buttons were a bit stiff for him....

54489[/snapback]

Bit high for him actually :naughty:

54727[/snapback]

 

BASTID!

 

Actually, while I wasn't arsed, everyone seems to think it's very funny today. Including some wag who's spent the last hour calling me 'Spiderman' and someone else claiming I did it on purpose.

 

Someone else said I should sue for Post Traumatic Stress. Hmmm...do you think that's got any mileage in it...

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Guest alex
I have visions of sweetleftpeg resembling the guy of the Mr Muscles advert, with him not been able to open the lift doors

54488[/snapback]

 

 

The lift was fine, the buttons were a bit stiff for him....

54489[/snapback]

Bit high for him actually :naughty:

54727[/snapback]

 

BASTID!

 

Actually, while I wasn't arsed, everyone seems to think it's very funny today. Including some wag who's spent the last hour calling me 'Spiderman' and someone else claiming I did it on purpose.

 

Someone else said I should sue for Post Traumatic Stress. Hmmm...do you think that's got any mileage in it...

54739[/snapback]

Sicknote for stress-related anxiety should do for a fortnight with your feet up :huh:

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Guest alex
Sicknote for stress-related anxiety should do for a fortnight with your feet up:naughty:

54740[/snapback]

 

Don't need to be off sick for that man. :D

54744[/snapback]

True :huh:

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Guest alex
Anyone reckon he's got himself trapped in a lift again, the tubby little stair-shy shithouse? :huh:

54881[/snapback]

:naughty:

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Anyone reckon he's got himself trapped in a lift again, the tubby little stair-shy shithouse? :naughty:

54881[/snapback]

 

Hey, that's all pure muscle man. It's a six pack, I've just left the rest of the shopping in.

 

It's easier to work with a laptop down in the basement, but I haven't got t'internet connection so I'm going to have to actually do work. I've been using the stairs though. :huh:

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