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Dating advice


NJS
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Okay this is about concepts and ground rules more than anything. The first ground rule is that any piss-taking will be taking in good grace. The second is that any request for pics will be fucked off.

 

Background:

 

I haven't been out with anyone for quite a while. Criminal shyness means I was never any good at the cold sell situation of bars/clubs and have only went out in the past with people I've worked with or met through mutual friends. Over the past couple of years I've become a bit lonely and also started to have a sad sense of time running out so I decided that in a bit of a cliched fashion as a new decade was starting I'd try something new and I signed up for an online dating site.

 

Situation:

 

I've now reached the free email exchange with 3 lasses and I went out with one last Saturday and had a really great time and we plan to repeat it either this week or next. I have a good feeling about her and can see at least a decent opening phase. The thing is I'm not sure about "stringing along" the other two. In fact one has hinted about meeting this weekend which I don't mind in theory but what is completely new to me is this "dating more than one person at once" thing. My gut instinct is that its a bit dishonest and I should let the first "relationship" run its course but at the back of mind is the idea that if it say lasts just a month or two could I in good grace call one of the others off the subs bench in any kind of honest way?

 

If I did feel okay about dating two at once should I be honest with the lasses themselves?

 

To be clear there is no way I would start a sexual relationship with more than one at once but that presents its own problem - does the relationship that proceeds naturally to sex first become the automatic "winner"?

 

What if at the back of my mind I liked one of them more but the other one was eager to progress further therefore crossing the line?

 

 

Does anyone have any thoughts, advice, experiences or just plain mockery?

 

I should also mention that I already have mates who would take the SMO/Wacky approach of telling me to shag them all behind each others backs and not give a shit - not going to happen.

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Treat them as applicants for a job. You have several candidates and they all get a few interviews each, then you decide who's the winner.

 

Of course if any of them want to suck you off in order to get a leg up in the interview process then that should be taken into account.

Edited by ewerk
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Until you've signed an exclusivity deal you're probably ok to 'date' others mate, given the modus of the introductions (the fact that they are multiple online introductions) and provided that all of the introductions started at the same time and remain at a relatively similar stage. If and when you've had the exclusivity conversation (and listen pro-actively, as lasses may infer that you have, whereas you might be waiting for the literal translation) then all that changes. Ditto if you end up nobbing one of them.

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Dating sites are designed to allow you to meet a whole host of people. You should go out with any and all of the ones you like, and no you shouldn't tell them that you're dating more than one at once. Just know that they'll be doing it too, and aren't telling you, and they'll EXPECT that you're doing it cos that's how these things work.

 

As for the sex thing, do whatever you feel comfortable doing. I wouldn't get too hung up about it though.

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Treat them as applicants for a job. You have several candidates and they all get a few interviews each, then you decide who's the winner.

 

Of course if any of them want to suck you off in order to get a leg up in the interview process then that should be taken into account.

 

 

Particularly if one of them looks like Spud out of Trainspotting.

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Dating sites are designed to allow you to meet a whole host of people. You should go out with any and all of the ones you like, and no you shouldn't tell them that you're dating more than one at once. Just know that they'll be doing it too, and aren't telling you, and they'll EXPECT that you're doing it cos that's how these things work.

 

As for the sex thing, do whatever you feel comfortable doing. I wouldn't get too hung up about it though.

 

 

Impressed you condensed all that experience into four lines.

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I wouldn't take the view that you are stringing along any of them at this stage. See how they treat you as well as how you might like them. It could be the one you least expect after one date which could be the best one.

 

Good luck.

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Dating sites are designed to allow you to meet a whole host of people. You should go out with any and all of the ones you like, and no you shouldn't tell them that you're dating more than one at once. Just know that they'll be doing it too, and aren't telling you, and they'll EXPECT that you're doing it cos that's how these things work.

 

As for the sex thing, do whatever you feel comfortable doing. I wouldn't get too hung up about it though.

 

 

Impressed you condensed all that experience into four lines.

 

Shut it, peashooter!

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I would agree with manc-mags advice. A friend of mine took the same course of action and met three "suitable candidates" online. She went out with each of them , one only got a first date but the other two got three or four before she decided on one that she wished to be exclusive with, and no she did not tell them she was dating anyone else at the same time. They have been together for a year now and are very happy. Good luck ;)

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Aye my sister's getting married later this year to a lad she met on one of these sites. So it can definitely work out.

She get rid of the Mackem cocksmoker?

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Aye my sister's getting married later this year to a lad she met on one of these sites. So it can definitely work out.

She get rid of the Mackem cocksmoker?

 

Plans to keep dating him up til when she gets married, following Gem's advice.

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Aye my sister's getting married later this year to a lad she met on one of these sites. So it can definitely work out.

She get rid of the Mackem cocksmoker?

 

Yep, he's long gone. This one's a really sound bloke.

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Aye my sister's getting married later this year to a lad she met on one of these sites. So it can definitely work out.

She get rid of the Mackem cocksmoker?

 

Plans to keep dating him up til when she gets married, following Gem's advice.

 

;) Suck it Trebeck.

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Hmmmmmmmmm, as has been said previously, treat these 3 lasses like they are at a job interview. meet each of them and judge them accordingly. dont go for the hard sell (sex) straight away. erm........., if any of them wants sex straight away BACK THE FOOK OFF! treat em all like you would treat a client going out for a meal/night out for a while. eventually you'll discover which one interests you the most. hope this helps and good luck to you bud!

 

 

 

 

 

oh, and pics, maybe?? might help us help you decide!!

 

 

 

 

;)

 

A guide

Edited by AvatarAxeman
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I'm available to conduct 'interviews', should you wish to fully evaluate their sexual prowess. Guaranteed to beat any like-for-like quote anarl - call me.

 

 

Take all three out. Not at once, knobheed - who do you think you are, ME??? As I was saying, take them each to the movies and do the 'knob through the hole in the bottom of the popcorn bucket' thing. Whichever goes back for more and more popcorn is the winner. Seemples.

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Best place on the internet for dating advice this place.

 

....and Childcare....and healthcare.....and boilercare....etc.

 

Its a one-stop shop for modern life.

 

I wish i could give NJS some advice but the only two mates who use these sort of sites do it to shag birds, not go out with them.

 

One of them told me that he met this one bird who he shagged on the first date and she asked him to double-fist her. What sort of bird meets a man off the interenet and gets into a fisting session? Let alone a double. He also uses that dateacougar.com and reckons he met this Russian milf with 'cracking bolt-ons but a moody boat'. His words not mine.

 

Funny old world really.

Edited by ChezGiven
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Bottom line is some computer has matched you up so they are more likely after a similar outcome to yourself and will also be dating more than one bloke at a time.

 

I would suggest that you be honest and tell them that you are not wanting to rush into any serious relationship. This will instantly put off the desperados and avoid you looking like a desperado.

 

I am sure that dating in this much more relaxed way will lead to better dates and more chance of naturally finding someone who you have real things in common with and a fair crack at making a lasting relationship.

 

I would however refer to to the earlier snake with tits comment and suggest instead cheap whores, pornos and Peter Palm.

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Best place on the internet for dating advice this place.

 

....and Childcare....and healthcare.....and boilercare....etc.

 

Its a one-stop shop for modern life.

 

I wish i could give NJS some advice but the only two mates who use these sort of sites do it to shag birds, not go out with them.

 

One of them told me that he met this one bird who he shagged on the first date and she asked him to double-fist her. What sort of bird meets a man off the interenet and gets into a fisting session? Let alone a double. He also uses that dateacougar.com and reckons he met this Russian milf with 'cracking bolt-ones but a moody boat'. His words not mine.

 

Funny old world really.

 

Brilliant. NJS this is where you need to be.

 

Had a quick search and theres 101 signed up and ready to go in this area including.

 

toontas.png

 

You'll do as you're told, won't you?

 

29 year old woman who likes to get her own way with fit, submissive boys.

 

I'm 5'6", slim but curvy size 12, have dark hair and green eyes and I'm likely to get under your skin.

 

Likes biting and scratching then kissing it better. Expects fitness, intelligence and obedience.

 

;):razz::)

 

 

 

Mind, there's a few old boilers on there as well.

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