Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Enjoy it while it lasts mate. They grow up/ change very fast. Tell us about it! Her elder sister is eleven going on sixteen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Pretty much the same here. Haven't seen the bairn since Wednesday morning and have had to deal with the worst stuff imaginable as a parent at work this week. Just wanted him home so I could give him a cuddle - which I've now done. He's more interested in the penalty shoot-out game on my iPad though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Had my lot down to Jesmond Dene for a walk this afternoon. After a disappointing search for sticks to hoy in the burn, finding nowt more than twigs, my 3yr old lad disappeared into the bushes and came out with a 6ft branch which was practically a log. He then insisted on dragging the fecking thing 200yds up the dene so he could lob it off a bridge. He was so excited all he could vocalise was a laugh/roar of truimph. Worth it for the looks of middle class horror from the Jesmondites Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 In a relaxed mood - first day of Barbados holiday and have spent the day on the beach which isn't something I make a habit of on holiday but I was sick on the plane flying in last night so wasn't good for anything else. Â Now watching some fanzone cable show with all these cunts from the Caribbean and Africa claiming to be die hard Chelsea/Arsenal/Scouse cunt fans - fuck right off. Fuck 'em! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 70 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Tell us about it! Her elder sister is eleven going on sixteen. My 10yr old has just got into her Lady Gaga (who I detest) and Pitbull (rapper) phase. I'm wondering when I'll be able to show her my records... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 70 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Had my lot down to Jesmond Dene for a walk this afternoon. After a disappointing search for sticks to hoy in the burn, finding nowt more than twigs, my 3yr old lad disappeared into the bushes and came out with a 6ft branch which was practically a log. He then insisted on dragging the fecking thing 200yds up the dene so he could lob it off a bridge. He was so excited all he could vocalise was a laugh/roar of truimph. Worth it for the looks of middle class horror from the Jesmondites Top monkeying! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 (edited) Had my lot down to Jesmond Dene for a walk this afternoon. After a disappointing search for sticks to hoy in the burn, finding nowt more than twigs, my 3yr old lad disappeared into the bushes and came out with a 6ft branch which was practically a log. He then insisted on dragging the fecking thing 200yds up the dene so he could lob it off a bridge. He was so excited all he could vocalise was a laugh/roar of truimph. Worth it for the looks of middle class horror from the Jesmondites Spent a fair bit of my youth in Heaton Park/Armstrong park/ Jezza dene. Wagged it a couple of times and me and my pal climbed up a tree and made strange animal noises when some of those middle classes walked their dogs. Was funny as fuck when they stopped and started to talk to other dog walkers wondering what that animal noise was. A few times we couldn't hold the laughter in and their faces was a picture when they realised they'd been had. It was a strange mixture of contempt and embarrassment they displayed. Edited March 23, 2014 by Howmanheyman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Top monkeying! Oh, he's definitely got the monkey glands Took my eye off him for a minute on the way back, when I looked up he was halfway up the bank to Paddy Freemans, clinging on to some tree roots shouting " Daddy, look at me, I'm climbing!" Mrs. Fist started gibbering, whilst I watched him proudly pick his way back down. I'm sure he's got prehensile feet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Spent a fair bit of my youth in Heaton Park/Armstrong park/ Jezza dene. Wagged it a couple of times and me and my pal climbed up a tree and made strange animal noises when some of those middle classes walked their dogs. Was funny as fuck when they stopped and started to talk to other dog walkers wondering what that animal noise was. A few times we couldn't hold the laughter in and their faces was a picture when they realised they'd been had. It was a strange mixture of contempt and embarrassment they displayed. We did a similar thing outside Killy club, HMHM, had some old alchy chatting to what he thought was a talking tree. Thinking about it now, the funniest part is imagining his Old Dear's face as he told her about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 We did a similar thing outside Killy club, HMHM, had some old alchy chatting to what he thought was a talking tree. Thinking about it now, the funniest part is imagining his Old Dear's face as he told her about it. A talking tree? :lol: Fucking hell, man! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Park Life 70 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 the demon drink. Â He was a well known pisshead, but even so, we still couldn't believe it ourselves. Think we were 11-12 at the time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 One time we wagged it we both had a note excusing us that we hadn't handed in when we really were bad and the teacher had forgotten about it so we knew we were ok for at least one skive. I saw my aunt walking her dog and had to quickly make a sharp exit. We then walked down old shields road and just as we got past Parsons a black car pulled up and out got Prince Philip with a couple of dignitaries and Tyne Tees cameramen. Unbelievable! I watched Northern Life that night with my arse twitching like a bunny rabbits nose in case we were on but luckily we weren't on the television clip. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Did he hoy any casual racism about the place? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Am not kidding, the car pulled up alongside us and he got out a couple of feet from us. He just glanced at us then smiled at some bigwig and one of them gave us a dirty look and they walked into Parsons. Luckily I left my cantonese straw pointy hat in the house that day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 I'd only just seen him on the Sunday on spitting image as well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26730 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Should've said 'which ones howmanheyman?' Â 'me.' Â 'you're a........etc, etc' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26228 Posted March 23, 2014 Share Posted March 23, 2014 In a relaxed mood - first day of Barbados holiday and have spent the day on the beach which isn't something I make a habit of on holiday but I was sick on the plane flying in last night so wasn't good for anything else. Â Now watching some fanzone cable show with all these cunts from the Caribbean and Africa claiming to be die hard Chelsea/Arsenal/Scouse cunt fans - fuck right off. Get yourself a bottle of XO and a bottle of coke and forget all about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 12756 Posted March 24, 2014 Share Posted March 24, 2014 My 10yr old has just got into her Lady Gaga (who I detest) and Pitbull (rapper) phase. I'm wondering when I'll be able to show her my records... Â This police record is from when Daddy got shot in the leg whilst lurking around Area 51 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Canny. Joining the Man Utd of my industry on Monday. Haven't had a drink since Saturday, and my lasses mother said she'd love to be me mother in law at the weekend. She'll have to pipe down about that for a few years though ffs. Desperate to beat these tramps tonight it would make me smile lots. Even Martinez is talking about the CL, deluded tramps. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Christmas Tree 3997 Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Canny. Joining the Man Utd of my industry on Monday. Haven't had a drink since Saturday, and my lasses mother said she'd love to be me mother in law at the weekend. She'll have to pipe down about that for a few years though ffs. Desperate to beat these tramps tonight it would make me smile lots. Even Martinez is talking about the CL, deluded tramps.  Tick Tock Tick Tock......... You're not getting any younger  Mini Steves and all that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38675 Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Selfie from the delivery room- " Wor lass reckons these surgical gowns make is look fat. Pipe down pet " Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 5899 Posted March 25, 2014 Share Posted March 25, 2014 Canny. Joining the Man Utd of my industry on Monday. Commiserations Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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