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The Secret Diary of Lee Ryder (aged 44 and a half)


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The secret diary of Lee Ryder aged 44 and a half   16/02/2019   Oh this year we're off to sunny Spain! Y Viva Espana! EEEh ya fucka, diary. The things ah get to do in this crazy wo

"Well diary, long time no see, ah was just about to set off for graft as some clever cunt, or so-called clever cunt had intraduc, introjuice, err brought in social distancing into Thomson house and we

The secret diary of Lee Ryder aged 44 and a half   01/10/2018   Alreet diary? Been almost a year since ah was in the kooh i noor restaurant in the bigg market disguised as an India

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:lol: I love that they always tag that Geordie dentist. I know people were hanging off everything he said over BZG as they were from the country he lives in, but I can’t see him being an expert on what the Saudis are doing. 

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1 hour ago, Howmanheyman said:

Clash of the Titans! Immovable object meets unstoppable force.....

 

 

:lol:

Step aside, Knight Ryder, it’s my understanding that there’s a new king in town, according to people familiar with the situation. 

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I can’t understand how people can knock his credentials. I am pretty sure he has a story in the pipeline about what fun88 does actually mean. A lot of people think it is about letters I the alphabet. But while the suggestion of fun88 does stand for “fun heil hitler” is popular in some parts of Boldon the 88 does actually stand for a little known character of the Chinese alphabet representing the wird “fa” the acronym for “four (brown) ales”, meaning the minimum umber of alcohol to consume to find him bearable.

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  • 4 weeks later...

 

Alan Shearer: 'Right, so first of all you make sure you can afford it. Then, you get in touch with Ashley to tell him your offer. If he's ok with it you show him proof of funds and pay a fee to look at the books. If you're ok with what you see then Ashley informs the PL.......Did you get all that?......ok, happy to help. See you later.'

 

 

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2 hours ago, Howmanheyman said:

 

Alan Shearer: 'Right, so first of all you make sure you can afford it. Then, you get in touch with Ashley to tell him your offer. If he's ok with it you show him proof of funds and pay a fee to look at the books. If you're ok with what you see then Ashley informs the PL.......Did you get all that?......ok, happy to help. That’s £50,000 for the consultation. Cheers lads.’

 

 

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:lol: I see Steve Wraith is giving this one his approval. Makes it feel super genuine now that Steve is interested in it and they have two ex players that know absolutely fuck all about buying a club consulting on it. I look forward to Wraith putting up pictures of the Tyne bridge with the flag of whatever country the people involved originate from in the background, what a little fucking rat he is man. 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Bruce used loans as he hoped to save money in January for his summer transfer kitty but the virus pandemic has saw finances cut at St James' Park, with the manager admitting last week: "That could only happen to me!"     

Fuck me, where to start with this paragraph? I’m not even going to mention the grammar - sack the sub editor - but a virus doesn’t have eyes, it cannot see, let alone saw. Nor is it a carpenter taking tools to NUFC’s finances. 

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2 hours ago, Dr Gloom said:

 

 

Fuck me, where to start with this paragraph? I’m not even going to mention the grammar - sack the sub editor - but a virus doesn’t have eyes, it cannot see, let alone saw. Nor is it a carpenter taking tools to NUFC’s finances. 

"Gramma's for old London hipster's who've forgotten their roots but know everything about sedgeways but have never SAW the whites of the eyes of certain football firms once back in the day from Charlton's firm among others."

 

4221396001_4459327924001_4459292041001-vs~2.jpg

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The Knight: "Archra, err...Archo.....Artcraft, err....Lazaar! Alreet wor kid? You're looking in good shape, kidda! Think you've a a great chance of getting in the side next season, son. It's Lee, Lee Ryder by the way, top reporter on all things NUFC from the evening chronicle, you might've heard the other players mentioning me? Anyways, do you fancy a quick interview then mebbees meet up once a month for a chat?"

 

Achraf Lazaar: "I'm really sorry, but Lee Marshall sorts out the interviews for players."

 

The Knight: "Nee bother, young'un."

 

 

 

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