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found on another forum

 

never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so

much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have

never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.

 

FOR EXAMPLE: One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

 

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."

 

I said "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

 

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me

to satisfy your physical needs as a man." She responded to my puzzled look

by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in

the bedroom?"

 

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

 

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with

her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big

unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on

several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to

take so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to

compliment her new clothes, so I said lets get a pair for each outfit. We

went onto the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond

earrings. Let me tell you...she was so excited. She must have thought I was

one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because

she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play

tennis. I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey."

She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.

Smiling with excited anticipation she finally said, "I think this is all

dear, let's go to the cashier."

 

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

 

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled WHAT?"

 

I then said "honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're

just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy

your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she

was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and

not for the things I buy you?"

 

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either.

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Where's that freakin' DeLorean? Could have sworn I was just transported back to 1980- when I FIRST read that joke.

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Guest Toplass-101

oops

:lol:

erm

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:lol:

erm

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

;)

erm

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Christmas Presents! :lol:

Duno how im gona wrap up 2 horny naked girls, but I couldnt think of anything else Peasepud would want to play with more on Christmas Day.

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Christmas Presents! :lol:

Duno how im gona wrap up 2 horny naked girls, but I couldnt think of anything else Peasepud would want to play with more on Christmas Day.

66445[/snapback]

 

 

Gawd you're the greatest! :lol:

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http://www.julekalender2005.leithoff.dk/

 

Flicked a few open at work, have now obtained a semi, will now log off for a bit to crack one off in the work bogs! Adios for a bit!

 

Just call me Jimbo.  :lol:

71115[/snapback]

See you in 30 seconds Jimbo ;)

71116[/snapback]

 

And i'm back, Wacky would be proud, i've managed to turn the work bogs into something resembling a plasterer's radio! :puke:

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http://www.julekalender2005.leithoff.dk/

 

Flicked a few open at work, have now obtained a semi, will now log off for a bit to crack one off in the work bogs! Adios for a bit!

 

Just call me Jimbo.  ;)

71115[/snapback]

See you in 30 seconds Jimbo :puke:

71116[/snapback]

 

And i'm back, Wacky would be proud, i've managed to turn the work bogs into something resembling a plasterer's radio! :puke:

71119[/snapback]

 

I had a plasterer in at my house the other day. He had a radio which was disappointingly clean. :lol:

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Hmmm, today's has two pretty girls. Nice enough, but not my cup of tea.

 

What happens when clicked onto the 'extra' link?? (I always get a bit worried of clicking extra things due to fear of letting all sorts of unpleasantness into me 'puta)

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