JawD 31 Posted March 27, 2012 Share Posted March 27, 2012 See that Tulisa is house hunting. I've got a canny semi she can look at! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8944 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 Angela Merkel arrives at Passport Control at Athens airport. "Nationality?" asks the immigration officer. "German," she replies. "Occupation?" "No, just here for a few days." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jusoda Kid 1 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 Apologies for hijacking the thread......... Right, there is so much allegedly going on. Firstly, the budget for transfers and the standard of player has dropped from Cisse (German based striker) and Piatti to Benjiani standard of freebie crap.That is if the various groups can decide who the fuck to make a move for (the Rao family, Kentaro/SEM and Kean apparently drew up their own lists of targets) The Jones money has allegedly disappeared and we'll have to sell before we buy a £2.5m defender from Monaco. Today's story is that there is a rumour that the Raos want to sell. So we've gone from looking forward to having a belting young Argie playing for us to selling what few good players we have left. The problem is, there are so many stories about transfer targets, budgets, indecision at the boardroom......etc. that we fans don't know what to believe. Frankly, under Venky's we're looking 100 times worse than when you went down a few seasons ago. So we're a fucking joke club right now. I'd put a joke on as well, but I actually haven't heard any. The jokes on you billy if you were after cisse Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 "Jesus Loves You" A comforting thing to read outside of a church, but not so much to hear in a Mexican prison... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted April 23, 2012 Share Posted April 23, 2012 (edited) Just tried to download some midget porn but I think my broadband is dodgy as all I got was a few little snatches. Edited April 23, 2012 by Monkeys Fist Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8944 Posted May 9, 2012 Share Posted May 9, 2012 Me and the wife were in the shopping centre earlier, where we rounded a corner to see a gaggle of young girls, all wearing next to nothing, pouring out of HMV. "Phoarr!", I said to the wife, pointing at a gorgeous lass of about twenty. "I bet you'd fucking love to have legs like hers". She didn't respond, but I could tell she was upset. I could hear the sob's as I wheeled her up the ramp into Debenhams. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4183 Posted May 9, 2012 Share Posted May 9, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NYD 0 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 One day a small cat was sitting hungry by a river when a small chipolata sausage came flowing past....the cat used his paw to get the chipolata and managed to not even get it wet. The cat was happy! The next day the cat was equally as hungry when a larger sausage came flowing past in the river, the cat dipped its paw in to get the sausage and only got its paw marginally wet, the cat was happy! The next day the cat was absolutely starving when a massive Frankfurter came flowing past..the cat dipped his paw in to get it but fell in! However the cat retrieved the sausage and was happy. The moral of the story is: the bigger the sausage....the wetter the pussy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NYD 0 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 I was watching a dwarf climbing down a prison wall when he turned and sneered at me.' Huh', I thought -' thats a little condescending' Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 31 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 Vidal Sassoon. Dyed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JawD 31 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 Clinton Cards - Thinking of you at this difficult time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted May 10, 2012 Share Posted May 10, 2012 Apparently Vidal Sassoon's funeral is going to be broadcast on the tv. Not in full though, just the highlights... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 His estate has just been announced. Had a bob or two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8944 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 His estate has just been announced. Had a bob or two. Yeah but there's some challenges to it's legitimacy, so it's not cut and dried... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Yeah but there's some challenges to it's legitimacy, so it's not cut and dried... Well, if you're going to split hairs about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8944 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Well, if you're going to split hairs about it Hoo! Don't get snippy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 I don't want to fall out Fish, but parting is such sweet sorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Would you two please stop merkin about this guy's death? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38532 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 He's worth it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brock Manson 0 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Frizz-ease a jolly good fellow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13932 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Every time I look at this thread it's got new extensions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nyff 0 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Hair today, gone tomorrow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26590 Posted May 11, 2012 Share Posted May 11, 2012 Fucking hell, can't believe you're all making jokes about this Sassoon. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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