ConsettMag 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 all I'm saying is have a read Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LeazesMag 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nufcboy 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 During his time at Newcastle United, Bramble was nicknamed variably Titus Bungle, Titus Shambles, Shitus Bramble or Twattus Bollocks by fans of the club as well as other clubs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
toonotl 2408 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Twattus Bollocks Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monroe Transfer 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Titus Malachi Bramble (born 31 July 1981) is an English con man who has been carrying out the longest con in history by pretending to be a premier league footballer. He currently tries to play as a defender, although he struggles severely, he still has not been found out by his current club Sunderland, who play in the Premier League and are worse than Newcastle. He is believed to be working with fellow hustler Emile Heskey, who is carrying out a similar style of con. Born in Ipswich, Suffolk, Bramble started his con at home town club Ipswich Town. After making his debut in the 1998/99 season, Bramble went on to make 48 league appearances for the club, also spending a brief period on loan at Colchester United, which Titus requested after Ipswich club officials became suspicious of his lack of footballing ability. He somehow scored four goals for Ipswich (this is being looked into in relation irregular betting patterns, notably people actually betting on Titus to score), with strikes against Sunderland in the league,[3] Millwall[4] and Coventry[5] in the League Cup and Torpedo Moscow in the UEFA Cup.[6] Newcastle United Bramble continued his con when joined Newcastle in July 2002 for £6 million, vowing at the time to make himself indispensable to then manager Sir Bobby Robson.[7] At the end of the 2003–04 season, readers of the football e-mail newsletter The Fiver voted Bramble as the worst player of the year in the English Premiership, although there was a silver readers of Hustler magazine voted him greatest grifter of all time.[8][9] Bramble apparently once scored a spectacular volleyed goal, although many believe this is just another part of the Titus' ruse, as no one actually believes titus bramble can actually play football score, let alone "spectacular volleys") against Chelsea on May 8, 2006 in a 1–0 victory that secured qualification for the Intertoto Cup.[10] On 10 August 2006, Titus scored another vital goal for Newcastle in the UEFA Cup second qualifying round with a header against Latvian side FK Ventspils. In the return leg as St James's Park, Bramble played horrendously in a 0–0 draw, allowing the Geordies to progress to the UEFA Cup. In December, Bramble was admitted into hospital after doctors initially thought his calf swelled to double its normal size. Turns out his penis had just unraveled and drooped down.[11] On 31 January 2007, Bramble returned to action against Aston Villa in the centre of defence alongside Steven Taylor, which became known as one of the worst defence in the history of defending anything. Bramble put in some horrific performances against Fulham, Liverpool, Middlesbrough and he says he once put in Man of The Match Performance against Zulte-Waregem, although that definitely never happened. After another poor performance in Newcastle's 2–0 defeat to AZ Alkmaar he was dropped by Glenn Roeder. He looked to be frozen out of Newcastle, due to the return of Craig Moore and consistency of Taylor and Oguchi Onyewu, although this was mainly due to Roeder catching onto what brambles true identity. During his time at Newcastle United, Bramble was affectionately nicknamed Titus Bungle, Titus Shambles, Shitus Bramble or Twattus Bollocks by fans of the club as well as other clubs. Wigan Athletic Titus Bramble signed for Wigan Athletic on a free transfer, agreeing to a three-year-deal on 4 June 2007. On 2 January 2008, Bramble scored a memorable goal at Anfield in a 1–1 draw against Liverpool – a 20-yard strike handing Wigan a late equaliser (again there is no proof such things occurred). Bramble scored a dramatic equaliser against Newcastle United at St. James' Park, the match finishing in a 2–2 draw on 15 November 2008. Bramble has expressed his gratitude to Wigan manager Steve Bruce for having faith in him when no one else did and for making him the player he is today. His performances throughout the 08/09 season picked him up four awards at the club's awards night, including 'Scam of the Year' and 'Player's Worst Player of the Year' for Wigan. On 14 July 2009 he was rewarded with a new contract, keeping him at the club until 2012. Though along with Bruce contracts mean nothing and he was soon off to the Stadium of Plight with apparently Bruce the only person in the world who wants Bramble (apart from the Met Police occasionally) Sunderland On 23 July 2010, Bramble joined Sunderland for a fee believed to be £1 million, and signed a three-year contract at the Stadium of Light. He was labelled as a 'bargain' by many football pundits after his transfer to Sunderland - these pundits of course not having a clue what they were talking about as usual, this has been backed up by zero accomplished performances in the 2010-2011 season. Games he has played in include the 1-1 draw with Arsenal, the 0-0 draw with Manchester United and the 1-0 victories over Man City and Aston Villa. Personal life One of his brothers, Tesfaye Bramble, is also a criminal and has represented Montserrat at international level. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CleeToonFan 1 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 Heskey's scored over 100 premier league goals as a second striker, always thought the guy should be given more credit than he gets tbh, Brambles wank though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Billy Castell 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 2nd striker? I thought that described players like Zola, Bergkamp, Sheringham etc. rather than clueless oafs wandering round fields with a banjo. It is criminal he even got 1 cap, let alone over 50. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted June 11, 2011 Share Posted June 11, 2011 very good prospect when he first came through at leicester lost his way or just stopped improving not long after. any know his injury history?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TicTacWoe 0 Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 I think Heskey at his peak was decent at club level but I could never understand why England managers kept picking him. No better than Shola. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gejon 2 Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 I think Heskey at his peak was decent at club level but I could never understand why England managers kept picking him. No better than Shola. Linked up pretty well with Owen. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DEADMAN 0 Posted June 12, 2011 Share Posted June 12, 2011 i love those nicknames hahaha twatus bollocks hahahaha Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CleeToonFan 1 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I think Heskey at his peak was decent at club level but I could never understand why England managers kept picking him. No better than Shola. Owen and Rooney said time after time they played better when he was with them. Fair enough Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sweetleftpeg 0 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 At a talk in with Alan Wilkie (ref from Chester-le-st who sent Catona off for the Kung Fu Kick at Palace) someone asked him who was the biggest cheating whinging foreigner he'd ever reffed. He said forget the foreigners, it's Emile Heskey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13836 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Sunderland's Titus Bramble arrested on suspicion of sexual assault & possession of a class A drug #SSN Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19808 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 should have been arrested long ago for crimes against football Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Knackers 0 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 His brother cant take the blame this time ffs, the cnut needs to locked up for life, no woman is safe with this fucker on the streets Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
David Kelly 1117 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 She said no Titus! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monroe Transfer 0 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 It's all Bruce's fault, being a Geordie and all that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Think JaMoUsE mentioned he had the biggest cock in the history of the club, well lets hope the only place he's using it is in a jail cell with Ian Huntley. You can tell by looking at him what he is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin S. Assilleekunt 1 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Shearer said Bramble was always the longest in the shower. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38733 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Stray balls in the box - bane of his life. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin S. Assilleekunt 1 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Police have released this photo of the suspect Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
McFaul 35 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 (edited) Shearer said Bramble was always the longest in the shower. Aye, was there not a quote somewhere that he could wash the plughole with his cock while standing up? Edited September 28, 2011 by McFaul Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kid Dynamite 5902 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 Sunderland's Titus Bramble arrested on suspicion of sexual assault & possession of a class A drug #SSN How many times does this have to happen before he actually gets locked up like any other non footballing rapists? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LoveTheBobby 1 Posted September 28, 2011 Share Posted September 28, 2011 His timing was always spot on like . From yesterdays Ronnie "TITUS BRAMBLE says Sunderland must find some consistency if they want to repeat last season’s top-10 finish.....We work hard all week in training on keeping the ball." http://www.chroniclelive.co.uk/sport/sunde...72703-29492946/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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