The Fish 8935 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 Just back from a break in Mauritius. If you don't want to see a gap between the haves and have nots, stay in the hotel complex or don't visit. Just stunning scenery, great food, friendly locals (during the day), and plenty to do. But if we'd done nothing but relax it still would have been amazing. Only downsides were the swimming with Dolphins trip, having to transfer through Dubai airport and Emirates. The former was a bit rushed and frantic. Of course all the promotional material shows smiling idiots petting dolphins, but this wasn't like that at all. Boat takes you to a spot where they know the dolphins are likely to be, along with about 15 other boats, your guide/drill sergeant ordering you into the ocean is reminiscent of operation Market Garden. Splash about a bit trying to spot a pod of dolphins who're likely scared and baffled by the sudden nonsense above them, then ordered back into the boat which tries to guess where the dolphins are headed. Orderered off the boat again and back on... it's a bit shit to be honest. I can't imagine the dolphins had much fun either. Dubai airport staff are surly and rude. I was searched twice for no apparent reason and with no apology afterwards. Unless the bloke just wanted to touch a man and this is his only chance in that country. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 (edited) 2 hours ago, The Fish said: Just back from a break in Mauritius. If you don't want to see a gap between the haves and have nots, stay in the hotel complex or don't visit. Just stunning scenery, great food, friendly locals (during the day), and plenty to do. But if we'd done nothing but relax it still would have been amazing. Only downsides were the swimming with Dolphins trip, having to transfer through Dubai airport and Emirates. The former was a bit rushed and frantic. Of course all the promotional material shows smiling idiots petting dolphins, but this wasn't like that at all. Boat takes you to a spot where they know the dolphins are likely to be, along with about 15 other boats, your guide/drill sergeant ordering you into the ocean is reminiscent of operation Market Garden. Splash about a bit trying to spot a pod of dolphins who're likely scared and baffled by the sudden nonsense above them, then ordered back into the boat which tries to guess where the dolphins are headed. Orderered off the boat again and back on... it's a bit shit to be honest. I can't imagine the dolphins had much fun either. Dubai airport staff are surly and rude. I was searched twice for no apparent reason and with no apology afterwards. Unless the bloke just wanted to touch a man and this is his only chance in that country. Bet they were seething when they heard fish was coming and you showed up Edited August 31, 2018 by TheGingerQuiff 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13924 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 1 hour ago, TheGingerQuiff said: Bet they were seething when they heard fish was coming and you showed up 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 14485 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 3 hours ago, The Fish said: Just back from a break in Mauritius. If you don't want to see a gap between the haves and have nots, stay in the hotel complex or don't visit. Just stunning scenery, great food, friendly locals (during the day), and plenty to do. But if we'd done nothing but relax it still would have been amazing. Only downsides were the swimming with Dolphins trip, having to transfer through Dubai airport and Emirates. The former was a bit rushed and frantic. Of course all the promotional material shows smiling idiots petting dolphins, but this wasn't like that at all. Boat takes you to a spot where they know the dolphins are likely to be, along with about 15 other boats, your guide/drill sergeant ordering you into the ocean is reminiscent of operation Market Garden. Splash about a bit trying to spot a pod of dolphins who're likely scared and baffled by the sudden nonsense above them, then ordered back into the boat which tries to guess where the dolphins are headed. Orderered off the boat again and back on... it's a bit shit to be honest. I can't imagine the dolphins had much fun either. Dubai airport staff are surly and rude. I was searched twice for no apparent reason and with no apology afterwards. Unless the bloke just wanted to touch a man and this is his only chance in that country. Operation Market Garden was to take a bridge over a canal at Arnhem in the Netherlands. It Iinvolved the largest military parachute drop in history, on to the farmland surrounding the inland town. It’s not near the sea. At all. The campaign you may be looking for is, I feel strongly, Operation Dynamo, which was launched to evacuate the BEF from the beeches near Dunkirk in Northern France. The poor souls encamped on the beeches, being strafed by the Luftwaffe, were indeed ordered to enter the water to meet the “little ships”, the flotilla of small craft requisitioned by the Royal Navy from harbour towns all over the English south coast to transport the men further out to sea where large liners & cargo vessels were waiting to transport them en mass back to dear old Blighty. Please brush up on your mid 20th century European military history before you use the subject as a metaphor for any further Indian Ocean based holiday anecdotes. You people make me sick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13804 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 Booked a treehouse Yurt in Kielder Forest for a few days in December. Going to try and have a look along to the observatory for an event among other things... Can't wait! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 17525 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 48 minutes ago, Tom said: Booked a treehouse Yurt in Kielder Forest for a few days in December. Going to try and have a look along to the observatory for an event among other things... Can't wait! Hope you get clear weather. If you do it will be amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13804 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 1 hour ago, Renton said: Hope you get clear weather. If you do it will be amazing. We're there for a few days and the Treehouse Yurt has a crows nest...so if we get clear weather for one day it'll be class. We'll have loads to do either way and the isolation sounds amazing. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrew 4179 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 7 hours ago, The Fish said: Dubai airport staff are surly and rude. I was searched twice for no apparent reason and with no apology afterwards. Unless the bloke just wanted to touch a man and this is his only chance in that country. Absolute opposite experience to me, went through there and spent a few hours waiting for my changeover last week, everyone was dead nice, security were really polite and quick to get through. Must be something about you mate. Also, why are you expecting an apology after being searched at an airport? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26109 Posted August 31, 2018 Share Posted August 31, 2018 It’s tough being that sexy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Carr's Gloves 3176 Posted September 1, 2018 Share Posted September 1, 2018 14 hours ago, Tom said: Booked a treehouse Yurt in Kielder Forest for a few days in December. Going to try and have a look along to the observatory for an event among other things... Can't wait! How can you have a treehouse yurt? Apart from the fact they’re not called yurts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13804 Posted September 1, 2018 Share Posted September 1, 2018 Don't ask me pal, I'm going there to enjoy myself 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8935 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 On 8/31/2018 at 18:45, PaddockLad said: Operation Market Garden was to take a bridge over a canal at Arnhem in the Netherlands. It Iinvolved the largest military parachute drop in history, on to the farmland surrounding the inland town. It’s not near the sea. At all. The campaign you may be looking for is, I feel strongly, Operation Dynamo, which was launched to evacuate the BEF from the beeches near Dunkirk in Northern France. The poor souls encamped on the beeches, being strafed by the Luftwaffe, were indeed ordered to enter the water to meet the “little ships”, the flotilla of small craft requisitioned by the Royal Navy from harbour towns all over the English south coast to transport the men further out to sea where large liners & cargo vessels were waiting to transport them en mass back to dear old Blighty. Please brush up on your mid 20th century European military history before you use the subject as a metaphor for any further Indian Ocean based holiday anecdotes. You people make me sick. I was using Market Garden reference because of the sudden drop of loads of people. Where they were dropped wasn't important to me. So swivel. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8935 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 On 8/31/2018 at 22:34, Andrew said: Absolute opposite experience to me, went through there and spent a few hours waiting for my changeover last week, everyone was dead nice, security were really polite and quick to get through. Must be something about you mate. Also, why are you expecting an apology after being searched at an airport? Searched once, that's fine and fair enough, but to be "randomly selected" for a second search and then sent on my way without then apologising for wasting my time, nah, they can fuck off. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gemmill 34146 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 (edited) I bet you insisted on wearing your aviators and dead-staring the guard during the first search, so he just thought "fuck this slaphead, let's go another round". Edited September 2, 2018 by Gemmill 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8935 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 Dunno what set him off. But I had to stop bumming this lad, set aside my beer and put down my bacon sandwich. All because he wanted to touch me up again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 14485 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 6 hours ago, The Fish said: I was using Market Garden reference because of the sudden drop of loads of people. Where they were dropped wasn't important to me. So swivel. They surely weren’t wearing parachutes to swim with dolphins Dave? My anger on this issue has now abated somewhat, I’m now more disappointed with you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 17525 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 3 hours ago, PaddockLad said: They surely weren’t wearing parachutes to swim with dolphins Dave? My anger on this issue has now abated somewhat, I’m now more disappointed with you. Just like his parents, sister, Meenzer, and very soon (I.e. already) his wife. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Renton 17525 Posted September 2, 2018 Share Posted September 2, 2018 (edited) Not really holidays as such but anyway. Think CT had a thread like this but he's a cunt. A few days ago I wrote on here that the UK is a shit hole. Written in a bit of anger in comparison with Italy and our ridiculously damaging BREXIT plan, and the utter cunts of our politicians. Anyhow, I accept that many place in Europe, in fact every country in the world, has shit hole places in it. I also accept that in fact the UK has probably the most spectacular and diverse heritage and natural beauty for such a small area. This summer, my mother in law bought a static caravan in Berwick and I got some English Heritage season tickets for the family. I have only spent 1 weekend at home in the last 2 months, and seen shit loads on Northumberland and borders Scotland. Some of the places I've visited were awsomel in their loveliness., Belsay Hall - lovely place, beautiful gardens, hall, and castle. Not busy either. Lake District - obvious, but nowhere on Earth so beautiful and accessible. St Abbs, just north of the border - absolutely loved this place. Can walk to Coldingham beach which is also lovely. Berwick is canny enough. Tynemouth priory is EH. As is Warkworth. Edinburgh, for the first time since I was a bairn went to the castle (1/2 price EH). Majorly impressed, despite the tourists, immense sense of history. And today, shamefully, my first trip to Craster and Dunstanburgh castle. Magnificent. What a setting for an ancient castle and lovely kippers. Summers gone but fucking hell, what a lovely place we live in. Might even get to Newcastle one day. Edited September 2, 2018 by Renton 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19716 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 Heading home from the lakes today. Had a great trip. Walked up cat bells till it got too scrambly for the three year old - worth it it’s for the views though. Amazing drive to buttermere and walk around the lake there. The desecent by the slate mine is other worldly - like how I imagine it would be to drive through but a crater on the moon. Kids and adults both loved the Keswick climbing wall centre and the high tree walking and zip wires. Two good days weather out of three so all in all a great trip. Just the 7 hour drive home to look forward to today. Borrowdale is nice. Decent pub grub at the Mary mount hotel, didn’t have time to fit in the pencil museum, unfortunately. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 30212 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 11 hours ago, Renton said: Not really holidays as such but anyway. Think CT had a thread like this but he's a cunt. A few days ago I wrote on here that the UK is a shit hole. Written in a bit of anger in comparison with Italy and our ridiculously damaging BREXIT plan, and the utter cunts of our politicians. Anyhow, I accept that many place in Europe, in fact every country in the world, has shit hole places in it. I also accept that in fact the UK has probably the most spectacular and diverse heritage and natural beauty for such a small area. This summer, my mother in law bought a static caravan in Berwick and I got some English Heritage season tickets for the family. I have only spent 1 weekend at home in the last 2 months, and seen shit loads on Northumberland and borders Scotland. Some of the places I've visited were awsomel in their loveliness., Belsay Hall - lovely place, beautiful gardens, hall, and castle. Not busy either. Lake District - obvious, but nowhere on Earth so beautiful and accessible. St Abbs, just north of the border - absolutely loved this place. Can walk to Coldingham beach which is also lovely. Berwick is canny enough. Tynemouth priory is EH. As is Warkworth. Edinburgh, for the first time since I was a bairn went to the castle (1/2 price EH). Majorly impressed, despite the tourists, immense sense of history. And today, shamefully, my first trip to Craster and Dunstanburgh castle. Magnificent. What a setting for an ancient castle and lovely kippers. Summers gone but fucking hell, what a lovely place we live in. Might even get to Newcastle one day. Like most countries, it’s the people who spoil it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26109 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 On 8/31/2018 at 14:54, The Fish said: Only downsides were the swimming with Dolphins trip, having to transfer through Dubai airport and Emirates. The former was a bit rushed and frantic. Of course all the promotional material shows smiling idiots petting dolphins, but this wasn't like that at all. Boat takes you to a spot where they know the dolphins are likely to be, along with about 15 other boats, your guide/drill sergeant ordering you into the ocean is reminiscent of operation Market Garden. Splash about a bit trying to spot a pod of dolphins who're likely scared and baffled by the sudden nonsense above them, then ordered back into the boat which tries to guess where the dolphins are headed. Orderered off the boat again and back on... it's a bit shit to be honest. I can't imagine the dolphins had much fun either. https://www.thedailymash.co.uk/news/environment/man-swimming-with-dolphins-thought-they-would-do-more-20180903176944 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 30212 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 Dave was hoping they'd be more like Freddie the Dolphin 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19716 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 13 hours ago, Renton said: Not really holidays as such but anyway. Think CT had a thread like this but he's a cunt. A few days ago I wrote on here that the UK is a shit hole. Written in a bit of anger in comparison with Italy and our ridiculously damaging BREXIT plan, and the utter cunts of our politicians. Anyhow, I accept that many place in Europe, in fact every country in the world, has shit hole places in it. I also accept that in fact the UK has probably the most spectacular and diverse heritage and natural beauty for such a small area. This summer, my mother in law bought a static caravan in Berwick and I got some English Heritage season tickets for the family. I have only spent 1 weekend at home in the last 2 months, and seen shit loads on Northumberland and borders Scotland. Some of the places I've visited were awsomel in their loveliness., Belsay Hall - lovely place, beautiful gardens, hall, and castle. Not busy either. Lake District - obvious, but nowhere on Earth so beautiful and accessible. St Abbs, just north of the border - absolutely loved this place. Can walk to Coldingham beach which is also lovely. Berwick is canny enough. Tynemouth priory is EH. As is Warkworth. Edinburgh, for the first time since I was a bairn went to the castle (1/2 price EH). Majorly impressed, despite the tourists, immense sense of history. And today, shamefully, my first trip to Craster and Dunstanburgh castle. Magnificent. What a setting for an ancient castle and lovely kippers. Summers gone but fucking hell, what a lovely place we live in. Might even get to Newcastle one day. Good summer to have spent a lot of it at home given the weather we’ve enjoyed. The lakes must have been glorious earlier in the summer when the sun was beating down every day. It was like that here on Friday. I quite enjoy it when it’s overcast and cloudy too though, the way the clouds cover the tops of the fells. Driving down to buttermere yesterday through the drizzle felt like I was in a scene from game of thrones Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38505 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 Next time you go up Berwick way, go to Eyemouth and book a trip on the rib boat- I took the kids during the school holidays, came out of Eyemouth, across Coldingham bay, past St.Abbs head, then returned. The cliffs up there are stunning. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 12733 Posted September 3, 2018 Share Posted September 3, 2018 2 hours ago, Alex said: Dave was hoping they'd be more like Freddie the Dolphin Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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