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http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguide/columni...1542702,00.html

 

First up, the prestigious Most Sickening Housemate award, which this year goes to a couple: Maxwell (London's village idiot) and Saskia (burly, wrathful harridan with a face that could advertise war)...

 

...faced with eviction, they settled for sulkily rutting like doomed livestock. The latter surely ranks as the least sexy thing ever broadcast on television. I'd get more aroused watching a dog drown in petrol.

 

The award for Most Alarming Behaviour goes, inevitably, to Craig - a high-risk FBI profile made flesh. When he wasn't proclaiming his own brilliance, weeping, masturbating, or shrieking uninformed opinions at a uninterested world, he was mindfucking his beloved Anthony - a man so profoundly thick you could sell him a pair of his own socks for £500, even if he was already wearing them.

 

Their relationship reached its nadir the night Anthony got paralytic and Craig sensed an opportunity. A bleak farce ensued - Anthony vomiting and crying for his gran, Craig frantically cuddling him while shouting, "I'm your only friend in here." It felt more like an extended outtake from Deliverance than a reality show. How Craig passed the psychological vetting process, and why he wasn't quietly removed from the house and given some gentle guidance, is a deeply worrying mystery.

 

...Science, a bull-headed, one-man belligerence engine...

 

The award for Snidest Conniving Prick goes to Derek, a man so devious he probably pisses cobra venom....

 

.... the Ugliest Body award is split between Sam and Orlaith, for poking their fake, motionless tits in the viewer's face (presumably to attract the sort of person who'd like to screw their way through the plastinated corpses at Professor von Hagens' Bodyworlds exhibition).

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http://www.guardian.co.uk/theguide/columni...1542702,00.html

 

First up, the prestigious Most Sickening Housemate award, which this year goes to a couple: Maxwell (London's village idiot) and Saskia (burly, wrathful harridan with a face that could advertise war)...

 

...faced with eviction, they settled for sulkily rutting like doomed livestock. The latter surely ranks as the least sexy thing ever broadcast on television. I'd get more aroused watching a dog drown in petrol.

 

The award for Most Alarming Behaviour goes, inevitably, to Craig - a high-risk FBI profile made flesh. When he wasn't proclaiming his own brilliance, weeping, masturbating, or shrieking uninformed opinions at a uninterested world, he was mindfucking his beloved Anthony - a man so profoundly thick you could sell him a pair of his own socks for £500, even if he was already wearing them.

 

Their relationship reached its nadir the night Anthony got paralytic and Craig sensed an opportunity. A bleak farce ensued - Anthony vomiting and crying for his gran, Craig frantically cuddling him while shouting, "I'm your only friend in here." It felt more like an extended outtake from Deliverance than a reality show. How Craig passed the psychological vetting process, and why he wasn't quietly removed from the house and given some gentle guidance, is a deeply worrying mystery.

 

...Science, a bull-headed, one-man belligerence engine...

 

The award for Snidest Conniving Prick goes to Derek, a man so devious he probably pisses cobra venom....

 

.... the Ugliest Body award is split between Sam and Orlaith, for poking their fake, motionless tits in the viewer's face (presumably to attract the sort of person who'd like to screw their way through the plastinated corpses at Professor von Hagens' Bodyworlds exhibition).

8516[/snapback]

 

Bloody hell the Guardians gone all Sunday Sport. :o

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I think this says it all, wierdo!

 

d71_0330_prank_1.jpg

8306[/snapback]

 

I am now officially scared.

 

What have I missed? :o

8324[/snapback]

 

 

Seriously, what the hell is he doing? ;) You would have thought BB would have kicked him out after pushing so much for a kicking, but its just getting ridiculous there now. He clearly needs help, personally I think a baseball bat would do the job. :(

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... the Ugliest Body award is split between Sam and Orlaith, for poking their fake, motionless tits in the viewer's face (presumably to attract the sort of person who'd like to screw their way through the plastinated corpses at Professor von Hagens' Bodyworlds exhibition).

8516[/snapback]

 

Amen to that. Both look like Mannequin dolls.

 

Right...Craig...I never let TV wind me up, but this lad needs a slap. The way he is treating and talking to Eugene at the moment is an utter disgrace. Typical bully, pick on the weak.

 

I hope this cowardly bastid gets the biggest boo of all time Wednesday night when justice will prevail and he'll be booted out.

 

He's a wanker, and he needs to fuck right off.

Edited by sweetleftpeg
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Right...Craig...I never let TV wind me up, but this lad needs a slap. The way he is treating and talking to Eugene at the moment is an utter disgrace. Typical bully, pick on the weak.

 

I hope this cowardly bastid gets the biggest boo of all time Wednesday night when justice will prevail and he'll be booted out.

 

He's a wanker, and he needs to fuck right off.

 

You're right.. Same with Makosi aswell.. She had a go at Eugene the other day "If you wanna say something to me say it to my face" then she goes behind his back and starts bitching about him! I hope she's out on Wednesday.. She really must think she's gonna win it.

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... the Ugliest Body award is split between Sam and Orlaith, for poking their fake, motionless tits in the viewer's face (presumably to attract the sort of person who'd like to screw their way through the plastinated corpses at Professor von Hagens' Bodyworlds exhibition).

8516[/snapback]

 

Amen to that. Both look like Mannequin dolls.

 

Right...Craig...I never let TV wind me up, but this lad needs a slap. The way he is treating and talking to Eugene at the moment is an utter disgrace. Typical bully, pick on the weak.

 

I hope this cowardly bastid gets the biggest boo of all time Wednesday night when justice will prevail and he'll be booted out.

 

He's a wanker, and he needs to fuck right off.

8654[/snapback]

 

 

:o

 

You go, girl! ;)

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Anthony or Eugene to win. All the others annoy me intensely, yet in some masochistic way i keep watching. Does this make me mentally ill?

9079[/snapback]

 

The sight of Craig makes me feel physically ill and yet I keep waching it too :o

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Makosi has just talked to Anthony like a piece of shit, patronising and insulting him, and Craig has just sat there laughing at him.

 

Only a 'mate' when he wants to be all touchy-feely.

9081[/snapback]

 

I'd love for Anthony to turn round and do a "Craig"

 

"You never back me up, you make me look like an idiot. The way Makosi spoke to me then and you just sat there. What kind of a friend are you? I sit there and defend you all the time and you just sit there laughing.....wah...wah...wah...fucking wahhhhh.........."

 

I hate Craig

 

And I'd cheerfully slap Makosi into the middle of next week. Fucking woven-haired bint.

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Makosi has just talked to Anthony like a piece of shit, patronising and insulting him, and Craig has just sat there laughing at him.

 

Only a 'mate' when he wants to be all touchy-feely.

9081[/snapback]

 

I'd love for Anthony to turn round and do a "Craig"

 

"You never back me up, you make me look like an idiot. The way Makosi spoke to me then and you just sat there. What kind of a friend are you? I sit there and defend you all the time and you just sit there laughing.....wah...wah...wah...fucking wahhhhh.........."

 

I hate Craig

 

And I'd cheerfully slap Makosi into the middle of next week. Fucking woven-haired bint.

9100[/snapback]

 

 

Ive gotta admit that for the first time since it started 5 years ago I've had to stop watching it. Boring, annoying fuckers the lot of them. If Anthony had given Craig a slap a few weeks ago it might have kept my attention but alas no, he was too concerned with being popular.

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