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A birthday present


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>A young man wanted to buy a gift for his girlfriend's birthday. They

>hadn't been going out very long so he thought long and hard before

>remembering that on their last couple of dates she had complained


>hands were cold. So he decided a pair of gloves might be


>not too personal but, nonetheless, thoughtful.


>Accompanied by his girlfriend's sister, they went to Harrods and he

>bought a stylish pair of cream coloured leather gloves. At the same

>time, the sister bought a pair of knickers and they both asked for


>purchases to be gift wrapped. Unfortunately, the shop assistant


>the items up and the guy left with the gift wrapped knickers and the

>girlfriend's sister left with the gloves.


>The boyfriend, without checking his package, decided to deliver his

>present in person, but when he arrived at his girlfriend's house she

>wasn't in.

>So instead he posted the present through her front door accompanied


>the following note:-


>Happy Birthday Darling,


>I hope you like these. I chose them because I noticed you're not in


>habit of wearing any when we go out in the evenings. Had it not been


>your sister, I'd have chosen long ones with white buttons, but she


>short ones & they're easier to pull off.


>I was worried because they're a delicate shade but the shop


>showed me the pair she's worn for the past 3 weeks & they're hardly

>soiled at all. I had her try on yours & 'though a little tight, they

>looked really smart.


>She said that the material helps keep her ring clean & shiny & in


>she hasn't had to wash it since wearing them. I wish you'd been

>there so

>I could've put them on for you myself as no doubt many hands will


>in contact with them before I see you again. Just think how many


>I'll hold them in my hand over the coming year.


>When you take them off, remember to blow into them as they will be a

>little damp from wearing. I hope you'll wear them for me on Friday



>All my love,




>P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur




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1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You're in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!

10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever

Think about?




1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let's have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you

11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

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i love mandays





I love mandays too :lol:


oh aye, do tell???? :icon_lol:



.....well im a normal red blooded female :blush:


shy anarl i see.... :jerkit:





i am actually! :blush:

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