Jump to content

A birthday present


Toonraider
 Share

Recommended Posts

>A young man wanted to buy a gift for his girlfriend's birthday. They

>hadn't been going out very long so he thought long and hard before

>remembering that on their last couple of dates she had complained

>her

>hands were cold. So he decided a pair of gloves might be

>appropriate,

>not too personal but, nonetheless, thoughtful.

>

>Accompanied by his girlfriend's sister, they went to Harrods and he

>bought a stylish pair of cream coloured leather gloves. At the same

>time, the sister bought a pair of knickers and they both asked for

>their

>purchases to be gift wrapped. Unfortunately, the shop assistant

>mixed

>the items up and the guy left with the gift wrapped knickers and the

>girlfriend's sister left with the gloves.

>

>The boyfriend, without checking his package, decided to deliver his

>present in person, but when he arrived at his girlfriend's house she

>wasn't in.

>So instead he posted the present through her front door accompanied

>by

>the following note:-

>

>Happy Birthday Darling,

>

>I hope you like these. I chose them because I noticed you're not in

>the

>habit of wearing any when we go out in the evenings. Had it not been

>for

>your sister, I'd have chosen long ones with white buttons, but she

>wears

>short ones & they're easier to pull off.

>

>I was worried because they're a delicate shade but the shop

>assistant

>showed me the pair she's worn for the past 3 weeks & they're hardly

>soiled at all. I had her try on yours & 'though a little tight, they

>looked really smart.

>

>She said that the material helps keep her ring clean & shiny & in

>fact

>she hasn't had to wash it since wearing them. I wish you'd been

>there so

>I could've put them on for you myself as no doubt many hands will

>come

>in contact with them before I see you again. Just think how many

>times

>I'll hold them in my hand over the coming year.

>

>When you take them off, remember to blow into them as they will be a

>little damp from wearing. I hope you'll wear them for me on Friday

>night.

>

>All my love,

>

>Dave

>

>P.S. The latest style is to wear them folded down with a little fur

>showing

 

:lol:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Another...

 

WOMEN'S ENGLISH:

1. Yes = No

2. No = Yes

3. Maybe = No

4. We need = I want

5. I am sorry = You'll be sorry

6. We need to talk = You're in trouble

7. Sure, go ahead = You better not

8. Do what you want = You will pay for this later

9. I am not upset = Of course, I am upset, you moron!

10. You're certainly attentive tonight = Is sex all you ever

Think about?

 

 

MEN'S ENGLISH:

1. I am hungry = I am hungry

2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy

3. I am tired = I am tired

4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

5. I love you = Let's have sex now

6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?

7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you.

8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you.

9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you.

10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you

11. I don't think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay

Link to comment
Share on other sites

i love mandays

101259[/snapback]

:angry:

101261[/snapback]

 

I love mandays too :lol:

101265[/snapback]

oh aye, do tell???? :icon_lol:

101267[/snapback]

 

.....well im a normal red blooded female :blush:

101269[/snapback]

shy anarl i see.... :jerkit:

101272[/snapback]

 

B)

 

i am actually! :blush:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share

×
×
  • Create New...