Gemmill 34184 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 3 minutes ago, Renton said: Ant, we need a "fuck you" button". 🖕 I've just remembered, you're also wearing a hard hat in this scene. The closing shot is of you rattling around in a mini cement mixer as Nick Knowles walks into the house with his arm around your missus. The front door closes behind them. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19738 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 5 hours ago, Renton said: I also feel your pain. Got all the major building work done just before the first lockdown. I've now ran out of steam and money so the house looks shit. Large bits of bare plaster. The roof leaks and the windows were fitted by a cowboy and are going to cost thousands to replace. But worse, the house is cluttered full of the wife's and kids shit. I can't stand it, I mean I'm not going for the minimalist look or owt but ffs keep the floors clear. It wouldn't matter if I inherited a footballers mansion, it would still look shit within 48 hours. I keep telling the mrs we should stop buying nice furniture and stuff only for our ingrate kids to fucking ruin it all. Wait till the little bastards fuck off before we deck it out with nice stuff. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19738 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 You’re not alone like Renton. We have had a nightmare with builders in London over the years. It’s full of cowboys who take full advantage of the city being full of middle class professionals - like me - who know Jack shit about any trade - I assume I always pay over the odds even when I go for the cheapest quote. Got 5 quotes from roofers who were all highly rated on checkatrade to replace a flat roof in our new place. They ranged from £2k to £15k! Some of them get so much work they will just dangle a stupidly expensive price at you in the hope you’re gullible or stupid enough to pay up. Polish builders seem to be more reliable. All my worst experiences have been with English tradesmen. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 Polish fuckers, ruining the middle class cash cow for the English Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19738 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 Good lads, the poles. Honest, hard working and generally reliable. The less said about their English counterparts the better Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 When I was 18 I worked on a building sites in Wimbledon with a few Eastern Europeans. A supermodelesque lass who happened to be black walked past and I pointed her out to them and the overwhelming response was nah, nigger. Then when I started working in a local factory Jack, the only gay in the factory had to go to HR about a Polish lad laughing at him and calling him a faggot. Pretty sure they have a homophobic government over there now as well. There are a few Poles I like but they're generally the ones I haven't bothered to get any political or social opinions off of Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 But if it saves you a few quid, gloomy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19738 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 (edited) Yeah, it’s only the polish builders who are racist and homophobic Edited May 15, 2021 by Dr Gloom 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13983 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 The only gay tradesman we've ever had in was Polish. I might rephrase that sentence. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 17 minutes ago, Dr Gloom said: Yeah, it’s only the polish builders who are racist and homophobic it's a different level of racism. Most of the casual racists I know wouldn't turn their noses up at a stunner of any origin. I'm not saying all poles are openly and vocally far-right, just all the ones I've met Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 (edited) 12 minutes ago, Meenzer said: The only gay tradesman we've ever had in was Polish. I might rephrase that sentence. Was he really a tradesman ? Was he coming to fix the sink? Edited May 15, 2021 by TheGingerQuiff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 30247 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 I was talking to a Polish lass I work with and, until then, I hadn’t really appreciated what a conservative, religious (Catholic) country it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 I'm sure there's liberals in Poland, outside of the LBGT-free zones Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38571 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 17 minutes ago, TheGingerQuiff said: Was he really a tradesman ? Was he coming to fix the sink? Toilet trader. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 26621 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 The wife had an elderly great uncle who was Polish. Never noticed any racism about him Whatsoever but the bloke lived some life being held at one point held by the Soviets and then the Nazis then getting over here to get back in Europe and fought in Monte Cassino among other places. Lovely bloke. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 19738 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 (edited) Russia is even worse. Not easy for gay people when you have an openly homophobic president Edited May 15, 2021 by Dr Gloom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 15, 2021 Share Posted May 15, 2021 26 minutes ago, Howmanheyman said: The wife had an elderly great uncle who was Polish. Never noticed any racism about him Whatsoever but the bloke lived some life being held at one point held by the Soviets and then the Nazis then getting over here to get back in Europe and fought in Monte Cassino among other places. Lovely bloke. OH THAT'S RIGHT, WADE IN AND PISS OVER MY GSNERALISATION WITH YOUR WAR HERO 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Fish 8950 Posted May 17, 2021 Share Posted May 17, 2021 On 15/05/2021 at 14:32, Renton said: My philosophy is, if its something I can't do, or if someone else will do it for less than my own hourly rate, pay them to do it. That covers pretty much everyone including the gardener. I'd rather try and earn more money in my job (which I mainly enjoy tbf) than do jobs I hate or will make a hash of anyway. Wife is regularly asking me to do DIY shit round the house, despite 8 years of evidence that I cannot do many DIY tasks to any decent standard. I'm keen to try, but when shit inevitably goes wrong, I should have a little "This is not what I'm good at" sign. I'd make one myself, but, y'know... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheGingerQuiff 2412 Posted May 17, 2021 Share Posted May 17, 2021 Pizza shop near me on a PR charm offensive 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38571 Posted May 17, 2021 Share Posted May 17, 2021 Interesting shift tonight- knocked on a punter in Gosforth and she answered the door with “ Can you help, call an ambulance, he’s collapsed!” I go in to find a seriously porky sparky in her kitchen, greyer than Manc Mag, sweating like Renton when the builders turn up, semi-conscious and with his 17yr old son stood rooted the spot. I got the lad on the phone for an amberlamps, checked fatty out and discerned- ‘he’s not having a heart attack right now’ which was good, checked he wasn’t/hadn’t had a stroke, then spoke to the 999 lass. Paramedic dispatched, she told me to go to Linden Road church ( which was just around the corner), and get the defibrillator “just in case” until the paramedic arrived. Medic was there when I got back, checked out Tubs and worked out that he’d probably popped a ligament in his knee as he bent over, jumped up too fast and that, combined with the admittedly excruciating pain of his knee exploding, had caused him to black out. Ffs, the useless fat fucker. Still, the wife who’s house it was was bang tidy, and very grateful. ( no, not that grateful) 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sammynb 2929 Posted May 17, 2021 Share Posted May 17, 2021 A tidy, grateful wife with a useless fatty for a husband - that’s got trouble written all over it Fist! Or you could always use the Bill Clinton arguement/approach! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex 30247 Posted May 18, 2021 Share Posted May 18, 2021 Poke her with a cigar holder? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13983 Posted May 18, 2021 Share Posted May 18, 2021 13 hours ago, Monkeys Fist said: Interesting shift tonight- knocked on a punter in Gosforth and she answered the door with “ Can you help, call an ambulance, he’s collapsed!” I go in to find a seriously porky sparky in her kitchen, greyer than Manc Mag, sweating like Renton when the builders turn up, semi-conscious and with his 17yr old son stood rooted the spot. I got the lad on the phone for an amberlamps, checked fatty out and discerned- ‘he’s not having a heart attack right now’ which was good, checked he wasn’t/hadn’t had a stroke, then spoke to the 999 lass. Paramedic dispatched, she told me to go to Linden Road church ( which was just around the corner), and get the defibrillator “just in case” until the paramedic arrived. Medic was there when I got back, checked out Tubs and worked out that he’d probably popped a ligament in his knee as he bent over, jumped up too fast and that, combined with the admittedly excruciating pain of his knee exploding, had caused him to black out. Ffs, the useless fat fucker. Still, the wife who’s house it was was bang tidy, and very grateful. ( no, not that grateful) That's right in my neck of the woods, that is. So to speak. I even went to Beavers in that church hall. (Steady, MF, steady.) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 38571 Posted May 18, 2021 Share Posted May 18, 2021 2 hours ago, Meenzer said: That's right in my neck of the woods, that is. So to speak. I even went to Beavers in that church hall. (Steady, MF, steady.) So, you’re not just posh, you’re Gosforth Posh. ( I think Sammy has slightly misunderstood the players in the above drama, btw Fat wobbler was a visiting tradesman to the house, bang tidy wife was the house owner. ) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13983 Posted May 18, 2021 Share Posted May 18, 2021 13 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: So, you’re not just posh, you’re Gosforth Posh. I was pretty much the only kid on our street who went to state school, so my folks did their best, but aye. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now