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Chinese commentater - "I hate Australia"

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The following letter was published in the Sydney Morning Herald:

 

'Just wanted to drop you all a note of condolence on your World Cup exit. Although you were never really good enough to be there in the first place, as one of our foreign outposts we think you did quite well and, most importantly, represented your Queen admirably. So, well done, little colony.

 

'On the upside though, now at least your long-haired, scruffy, unclean teenage masses can all return to London to resume their minimum wage jobs, serving us thirsty English boys warm beer, just in time for the games on Friday and Saturday. Good timing, really, because as everyone agrees, the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left.

 

'Well, chin up, anyway, pickpockets, and I suppose it's back to stealing your mothers' ironing boards and heading to the sea to try to dodge those hungry sharks. How sweet. Best regards and God save the Queen.

 

'Paul Kaynes West Sussex (England)'

 

:D

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

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The following letter was published in the Sydney Morning Herald:

 

'Just wanted to drop you all a note of condolence on your World Cup exit. Although you were never really good enough to be there in the first place, as one of our foreign outposts we think you did quite well and, most importantly, represented your Queen admirably. So, well done, little colony.

 

'On the upside though, now at least your long-haired, scruffy, unclean teenage masses can all return to London to resume their minimum wage jobs, serving us thirsty English boys warm beer, just in time for the games on Friday and Saturday. Good timing, really, because as everyone agrees, the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left.

 

'Well, chin up, anyway, pickpockets, and I suppose it's back to stealing your mothers' ironing boards and heading to the sea to try to dodge those hungry sharks. How sweet. Best regards and God save the Queen.

 

'Paul Kaynes West Sussex (England)'

 

:D

154635[/snapback]

 

Come on Halliwell, what's your answer to this one? :D

 

Wellsy's gone a bit quiet of late too! :icon_lol:

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

It's English jealousy tbh. Deep down you all wish you could be one of God's chosen people, aka Australian.

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It's English jealousy tbh. Deep down you all wish you could be one of God's chosen people, aka Australian.

154648[/snapback]

 

But you're all English convicts, do you mean Abos then?

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

It's English jealousy tbh. Deep down you all wish you could be one of God's chosen people, aka Australian.

154648[/snapback]

 

English gone further in the Rugby WC, the Ashes and now the FIFA WC...

 

You're back in our pockets Stevie boy! :D

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Guest CrimsonFault
I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

It's English jealousy tbh. Deep down you all wish you could be one of God's chosen people, aka Australian.

154648[/snapback]

 

English gone further in the Rugby WC, the Ashes and now the FIFA WC...

 

You're back in our pockets Stevie boy! :D

154657[/snapback]

 

Yeah but they did beat us 3-1 in a friendly a few years ago.

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

Oh shurrup you miserable git! :D

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

Oh shurrup you miserable git! :D

154674[/snapback]

 

16 going on 50, that lad. Dan, if that letter wound ONE Australian up, it's done its job. It's not designed to make them laugh! :D

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I know I'm missing the humour here, but does anybody else find that letter a bit lame? The stereotypes are pretty tiresome and god knows that the Aussies must think if that's 'English humour'. I'm sure the Australians could write an equally banal letter in reply.

 

I know I sound like a grumpy old man here, but surely someone could do better than that?

154639[/snapback]

 

It's English jealousy tbh. Deep down you all wish you could be one of God's chosen people, aka Australian.

154648[/snapback]

 

English gone further in the Rugby WC, the Ashes and now the FIFA WC...

 

You're back in our pockets Stevie boy! :D

154657[/snapback]

 

Yeah but they did beat us 3-1 in a friendly a few years ago.

154660[/snapback]

 

Important points are "friendly" and "few years ago". :D

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I am infuriated by that letter and will never speak English again out of protest.

154721[/snapback]

No big deal when Croatian's the lingua franca of your national team, I guess. :D

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I think the main problem with Australia is that they are bad losers and EVEN worse winners.

154735[/snapback]

 

I'm afraid you are wrong, the main problem with Australia is that it's above sea level :D

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I think the main problem with Australia is that they are bad losers and EVEN worse winners.

154735[/snapback]

 

I'm afraid you are wrong, the main problem with Australia is that it's above sea level :D

154742[/snapback]

 

:D:D:icon_lol::lol:;)

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The following letter was published in the Sydney Morning Herald:

 

'Just wanted to drop you all a note of condolence on your World Cup exit. Although you were never really good enough to be there in the first place, as one of our foreign outposts we think you did quite well and, most importantly, represented your Queen admirably. So, well done, little colony.

 

'On the upside though, now at least your long-haired, scruffy, unclean teenage masses can all return to London to resume their minimum wage jobs, serving us thirsty English boys warm beer, just in time for the games on Friday and Saturday. Good timing, really, because as everyone agrees, the real tournament starts now that only the real footballing teams are left.

 

'Well, chin up, anyway, pickpockets, and I suppose it's back to stealing your mothers' ironing boards and heading to the sea to try to dodge those hungry sharks. How sweet. Best regards and God save the Queen.

 

'Paul Kaynes West Sussex (England)'

 

:D

154635[/snapback]

 

Come on Halliwell, what's your answer to this one? :D

 

Wellsy's gone a bit quiet of late too! :lol:

154642[/snapback]

 

Busy tbh, World Cup is over so catch up on some sleep and i have had plenty of other things to do now that i am moving house.

 

I think the main problem with Australia is that they are bad losers and EVEN worse winners.

154735[/snapback]

 

I'm afraid you are wrong, the main problem with Australia is that it's above sea level ;)

154742[/snapback]

 

:icon_lol:

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