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DanTheMan

Dad jokes

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Discovered this on the b3ta.com message boards

 

...my Dad feels the compelling need to trot out his array of "hilarious" restaurant jokes.

 

Someone drops a plate - "Sack the juggler!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

The sweet trolley arrives - "Is that a trifle or am I wrong?" (to be said to sound vaguely like "a meringue") followed by howls of laughter.

 

The bread rolls turn up - "Do you have to use your loaf for this job?" "Do you earn a lot of dough?" followed by howls of laughter.

 

The Soup of the day turns up - "Oh souper!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

At the chinese when all the dishes turn up at once - "ooh lovely. Whats everyone else having?" followed by howls of laughter.

 

At the indian placing an order - "Couple of Naans and a grandad!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

When the bill arrives he hums the theme tune to 'The Bill'.

 

He once ordered shark just so he could hum the 'Jaws' music as it arrived.

 

I could go on (making a 'bra' out of his napkin, telling the waitress there's something wrong with his spoon and handing her his fork and don't even get me started on the "leg or breast" shennanigans at Christmas dinner every year) but frankly I'm losing the will to live.

 

Anyone else have a suitably embarrassing Dad? :lol:

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Discovered this on the b3ta.com message boards

 

...my Dad feels the compelling need to trot out his array of "hilarious" restaurant jokes.

 

Someone drops a plate - "Sack the juggler!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

The sweet trolley arrives - "Is that a trifle or am I wrong?" (to be said to sound vaguely like "a meringue") followed by howls of laughter.

 

The bread rolls turn up - "Do you have to use your loaf for this job?" "Do you earn a lot of dough?" followed by howls of laughter.

 

The Soup of the day turns up - "Oh souper!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

At the chinese when all the dishes turn up at once - "ooh lovely. Whats everyone else having?" followed by howls of laughter.

 

At the indian placing an order - "Couple of Naans and a grandad!" followed by howls of laughter.

 

When the bill arrives he hums the theme tune to 'The Bill'.

 

He once ordered shark just so he could hum the 'Jaws' music as it arrived.

 

I could go on (making a 'bra' out of his napkin, telling the waitress there's something wrong with his spoon and handing her his fork and don't even get me started on the "leg or breast" shennanigans at Christmas dinner every year) but frankly I'm losing the will to live.

 

Anyone else have a suitably embarrassing Dad? :lol:

158310[/snapback]

 

but that's funny as fuck, think Im gonna use a few of them myself to be honest!

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'telling the waitress there's something wrong with his spoon and handing her his fork'

 

That's my favourite one! :lol:

158318[/snapback]

 

 

I liked that one, maybe it's because I'm a dad :hunter:

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