Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13804 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Balls tbh Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 That's bloody terrible Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoops 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Now everyone else has said it.... THAT WAS SHITE!!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 i bet snoops and catmag are sitting giggling away Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Patrokles Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 (edited) Now everyone else has said it.... THAT WAS SHITE!!!!! Sorry Laz, but when even Snoops slates you, you know any career in messageboard comedy you had is basically over. Edited October 31, 2006 by Patrokles Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoops 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 i bet snoops and catmag are sitting giggling away Wanna bet? And is that you in your avatar because if it is, you are very sexy with your wig and false tache on!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoops 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Sorry Laz, but when even Snoops slates you, you know any career in messageboard comedy you had is basically over. Aye because I laugh at anything. Just look at Gemmill, I laugh at all off his jokes!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 i bet snoops and catmag are sitting giggling away Wanna bet? And is that you in your avatar because if it is, you are very sexy with your wig and false tache on!!! Wig? False tash?? Both real and took ages to grow. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 i bet snoops and catmag are sitting giggling away Errrrr..... nar. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 ok then you fickle fillies What about this one? A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoops 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 It took me a while to work that one out. But then again I am blonde Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meenzer 13924 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Jesus, that's terrible. still though Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 I was in my car, and I was driving along, and my boss rang up, and he said, "You've been promoted". And I swerved. And then he rang up a second time and said "You've been promoted again". And I swerved again. He rang up a third time and said, "You're managing director". And I went into a tree. And a policeman came up and said, "What happened to you?" And I said, "I careered off the road". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Snoops 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 That one was painfully bad!! Where do you get them, from your own head? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 That one was painfully bad!! Where do you get them, from your own head? There not mine! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lazarus 0 Posted October 31, 2006 Author Share Posted October 31, 2006 (edited) Lots of people were chucking money to a man in the street whose hood kept jumping up and down. I asked him 'Do you earn a living doing that?' He said 'Yes, this is my livelihood.'" Edited October 31, 2006 by Lazarus Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
catmag 336 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Laz man - packit in Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 13804 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Lots of people were chucking money to a man in the street whose hood kept jumping up and down. I asked him 'Do you earn a living doing that?' He said 'Yes, this is my livelihood.'" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Patrokles Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 ok then you fickle fillies What about this one? A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy I actually really liked that one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Radgina 1 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 ok then you fickle fillies What about this one? A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy I actually really liked that one. actually so did I but then again I have a drink problem... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 26113 Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 Mmmm is it bad that I found them all funny? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Patrokles Posted October 31, 2006 Share Posted October 31, 2006 ok then you fickle fillies What about this one? A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy I actually really liked that one. actually so did I but then again I have a drink problem... That's the first step. You deserve a big hug and a pat on the back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
@yourservice 67 Posted November 12, 2006 Share Posted November 12, 2006 An 85-year-old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring back a semen sample tomorrow." The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared at the doctor's office and gave him the jar, which was as clean and empty as on the previousday. The doctor asked what happened and the man explained: "Well, doc, it's like this - first I tried with my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried with my left hand, but still nothing. Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with her right hand, then her left, still nothing. She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, then with her teeth out, and still nothing. We even called up Arlene, the lady next door and she tried too, first with both hands, then an armpit and she even tried squeezin it between her knees, but still nothing. "The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" .................... "Yep." "None of us could get the jar open!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Patrokles Posted November 12, 2006 Share Posted November 12, 2006 Bobby did that on N-O! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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