Howmanheyman

I guess if there was a 'funny clip' thread this wouldn't be in it. Jesus, Fist, is this the dumbed down US version of 'loose women'? Lovely to look at, though.

I got to see that Katy Perry pic in 'funny pictures'. Thanks, Toontastic.

She knows she's got it, does the Perry. The utter cunt he is........... the hispanic mom from modern family Me gusta las bapas! If you like the continental stylish women then have a look at Penelope Cruz in 'Volver'. Her dumplings were boiling over in that film. The wife said, "Mind, she's lovely that Penelope Cruz", I replied, "Aye she's alright I suppose".

Wow, thats a great record the scousers have got this year on X factor, you must be so proud....... ........Is the answer a psychiatrist might give you as you lie on his couch as he seeks to win your trust so he he can delve into your bleak, shattered life.

The clubs decision to make level 7 season ticket or membership only has backfired totally, so far in our three home games there's been less in there than for any of the games last season in the 2nd division. Also the 'no capital outlay' memo to the press was a masterpiece in how to put any waverers off. Some people obviously didn't like the idea of paying to watch us get stuffed most games at home, which is how the statement came across.

The match itself was easily the lowpoint of the season so far, we were a bit lacklustre in the 1st half but still way better than Stoke who were simply awful, BUT! What happened after the break was disgraceful to be honest, we all know what Stoke are like and what their strongpoints are, you give them freekicks and throw-ins at your peril, bad, bad defeat and I'm afraid getting beat at home to Blackpool and Stoke at home so early on is very worrying, the B'pool game we all put down to 'one of those days', there can be no such excuse for yesterday. On a positive note, Tiote looks head and shoulders better than Smith, mistake bringing him off if you ask me. P.S. I don't know if any of you spotted my mortal drunk twin, think he was around here last night.

Unfortunately we've given the twat the last laugh. Honestly, his side stink out every ground they play at.

I'm absolutely spitting blood with something I saw after the game, walking past the Stoke fans, (My perch is next to them), they came out full of shit having beat us, (fair enough, you give it, you take it), Some complete prick of a cop grabs a kid no more than 14 at best, picks him up and shoves him in front of the stoke fans, I was fucking apoplectic at the time he did it, he could have picked any amount of them, any amount of some worky Geordies but picks a young kid who probably knew no better, I almost had to bite myself to stop myself from having it out with this utter cunt as I would have been lifted 100% if I'd spoke my mind, (I've no doubt violence would have been injected by said bastard and his black bastard mates when I told him I strongly disagreed with his treatment of the young kid). I'm still fucking livid now, I did the right thing for myself and my family, (I'd have been in Market Street now if I'd stepped in), but even now feel that I should have said something to the wanker. .........And I haven't even mentioned the game yet!

These home games against Stoke, Blackpool etc are good indicators of how our season will end up going, we had 'one of those days' against Blackpool but ultimately dropped three vital points to a team we need to be beating at home. Give Stoke a chance with careless freekicks and throw-ins and you're just asking for trouble, keep that to a minimum and we should beat them, we need a good attitude today from not only the players but also our support, (to be fair, we kept with the lads against B'pool). 'It's only Stoke' is the biggest threat to us getting three points today. Totally agree with you, but on the flip side we don't want to be going in there shitting ourselves that its stoke, the players should be told to really have a go at them, tiote to sit in front of the back 2 and encourage perch and enrique to get forward and help Routy and Jonas, Jonas to lay off to Ben arfa when possible, keep the ball on the deck and move it around, none of this over the top, direct football bollocks Definitely not, you're right I just sometimes worry after a couple of superb away wins the feet might get taken off the pedal. To be fair, I'm sure Hughton will be drumming the name 'Blackpool' into them to avoid this, also I hope the players have seen Stokes two goals in midweek which were just typical Stoke goals.

McEwans Champion is a good shout. I used to work at the Tyne Brewery and this was a similar drink to an exported drink called 'McEwans best scotch' which was 8% abv and was the dogs bollocks. As stated by someone else, not something you just chuck down your neck! We used to make the old peculiar as well which isn't bad, either.

These home games against Stoke, Blackpool etc are good indicators of how our season will end up going, we had 'one of those days' against Blackpool but ultimately dropped three vital points to a team we need to be beating at home. Give Stoke a chance with careless freekicks and throw-ins and you're just asking for trouble, keep that to a minimum and we should beat them, we need a good attitude today from not only the players but also our support, (to be fair, we kept with the lads against B'pool). 'It's only Stoke' is the biggest threat to us getting three points today.

Depends which team turns up. Keep the ball on the ground and let them chase the ball, be clinical in front of goal and I really think we'll do these today, if we turn up a bit sluggish, think we're just going to win no matter what, give daft free kicks and throw ins in our own half and it could be a very long day indeed for us. Lets hope the lads are up for it and feeling sharp.

You could argue that Pompey and West Ham were lucky to only get fines as well. The Premier league looks after its own.

So where does that leave NUFC in your ideal, 'competitive' league? I'll eat my fucking hat if you can remember what football in this country was like before that cunt Murdoch got his talons into it.

We've got them at home, lets just go for it. I'd much rather have them at home now than at Wembley in the final. I had a strong feeling we'd get them as well.

Probably got his wording wrong, to be fair. He's probably just glad to be playing at these grounds against good players when he might have still been in the lower leagues. How many oppo players/managers praise SJP? Just about every one who plays us I'd guess, the fans don't always do it but then jealousy is really a big green eyed monster and they're only human.

Standard are pointing the fingure at Ross Turnbull. I watched the highlights at lunchtime and his positioning of the wall is pathetic. http://www.thisislondon.co.uk/standard-spo...-carling-cup.do Andy Jacobs said on Talkshite this afternoon that if Cech had been in nets they would've won 3-0. Bitter blue bastard. I was almost tempted to put him him on to hear his take on it as the last time I listened to their show he basically came out with every cliche in the book about how deluded us Mags were the afternoon after KK came back, anyway, I say I was 'almost' tempted, but then I remembered how spectacularly unfunny he and his sidekick are and how uninteresting as well, so I kept my music on as I was painting my kitchen. Thanks for doing the dirty work on our behalfs, though, Dr Ken.

If you look about 49-51 seconds I was behind the white entrance thing about 20 feet up if it was an inch higher you'd see me. That goal gave me more joy than his winner the season after, in fact without doubt the goal is my fav toon goal pre Keegan. See when the toon scored to our left there was 100 toon in the mackem Paddock and they went mental, and the mackems had a right go was like the wild west for a few minutes, Stevie Watson missed an open goal with a diving header about a minute later, would o been even better. That was a very young team we were forced to put out through being skint and having a load of injuries, the mackems were back in the 2nd div after their one season in the 1st after the pure spawnyness of getting promoted by default after Swindons betting scandal*. Most Mags were a little nervous looking at our side and thinking the mackems had more experience in their side, we were the better side after we equalised and you're right, I'd forgotten all about Watsons header, I still don't know how he missed it actually, he flew at it like Billy the fish! Ive been to Roker four times and I can't think of one game where there wasn't scuffling and fighting in their ends at some point in the match, it just always happened. In the 2-1 win in '92 play stopped for about 5-8 mins after both our goals because of rucks in the clock stand paddocks and Fulwell end. *When you look back at how Swindon were dealt with then, you just know for a fact that a Spurs, West Ham etc wouldn't have got punished as bad as Swindon did. For any one that is unaware of what happened, Swindon beat the Mackems in the play off final at Wembley, 1-0, (should have been more), got promoted but at the time were under investigation for an FA cup tie two years previous at SJP where the Swindon manager, Lou Macari had a big bet that we would beat them. We went on to finish 8th in the top flight and had a decent side with Gazza really starting to show what a player he was going to be, Swindon I'm sure were in the 3rd div. Like I said, the football league knew what happened, let Swindon compete in the play offs, saw them win it, then relegated them from the the 1st div to the 3rd, giving their 1st div place to the mackems instead, I remember Mags going fucking ballistic at the time as the play offs were still fairly new and we were still pissed off that finishing 3rd hadn't got us automatic promotion, a few thought that we should have been promoted instead of Sunderland due to our higher league position, (they finished 6th). There were no phone-ins in those days so some did the only thing they could by phoning Alan Robsons nightowls! That cunt was fucking seething that his usual grannies/loners/suicide callers were being replaced by infuriated Mags doing their nuts. Eventually he stopped taking their calls but not before he nailed his colours to the mast by saying that Sunderland should have got the promotion place, he never 'made any noise' about that in the one embarrassing season SJH put him on the SJP tannoy, the fucking annoying ginger prick he was.

Can't believe I've found this. Liam O'Brien's best goal at Roker Park, (and it isn't the free kick). I was at both games shown and I didn't even know that Hardyman got sent off as we were still going mental over Budgies save. The 1-1 game and the Roker end was more packed that day as the mackems tried to give us less tickets by closing a section, the result being that more Mags managed to get in by hook or crook and were more tightly squeezed together, O'Brien's chip was class and seeing it on the telly and us Mags just swaying forward as much as jumping up and down is a sight I thought was lost, glad someone kept it and put it on youtube).

I could only watch half of that, he's a boring bastard, it has to said, with or without an accent. I know he was talking slow for the interpretor but that was nowhere near as bad as shu dutch accshent.

Well put, Parky, but NUFC being NUFC I just can't see us climbing through that 'window'. We'll get half way through and cut our neck on a pain of glass. Shut up, man, it's my turn!

Well put, Parky, but NUFC being NUFC I just can't see us climbing through that 'window'.

What can you say? Comes across as reasonable at times as well. PMSL Yes, you've already said that.

Is this stevie as well?

What can you say? Comes across as reasonable at times as well.