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This is our year lads, I can feel it. The Sela Cup is coming home!

Isn’t this also the name of your Etsy page?

3 – 0 And fuck him the throat stroking bollockless cunt.

I’m willing to give Targett some slack as he’s barely kicked a ball for about a year but we could do with him getting back to some amount of solidity before long

thumb in a softie?

5 points from 1 game, canny. Keep this form up and I can see us getting 100 plus points this season.

Especially when you consider that we got Gordon with his seven goals for half that price.

All the bairns had decent games. But Miley and Anderson really great to watch.

the whole idea of this “cup” is so that both XIs play 90 minutes

Wykiki in rare Southgate rage. Henderson is done man. When he signed that mega buck contract he knew his international career was over.

I've always wondered how rapists make it work. Like do they have a bonk on prior to giving chase or do they rub it up a bit after the catch? Sometimes I can't summon the mood no matter what, and others it just won't go down. I can see me being the ASM of the forum in this new direction we're going.

Tbf it won't be anywhere near as funny or entertaining as the mackem mockumentary one, which gave This is Spinal Tap a run for their money. I still laugh when I thinkof the WIll Grigg negotiations.

That’s a new Gordon and Tonali shirt for Adam P.

Thoughts and prayers. 🙏

The thing re: Man Utd at home was that whilst it wasn’t the cakewalk it was against Spurs, it was almost as dominant a performance and Man Utd were extremely flattered by the 2-0 score.

Was just reading that story. It's funny but it's not just the mackems. Northumbrian Water needs its fucking arse kicking, the whole of the north east coast all the way up to Berwick was just a sea of tod a couple of weekends ago.

Nice one Yorkie-T. I've spent the last week in North Yorkshire BTW. Fucking lashed it down the whole time. Still a beautiful place though.

Bit of a concern that Howe was talking in the press conference about how little time there has been for training because of all the fan friendly stuff they had to do in America. I know the commercial stuff is massive for us but getting a proper pre season in is canny important too.

GET IN

Fucking hell, Gordon.

miley is class

Being Italian

Im assuming he will fill in at left back on occasion as well. Basically a massive upgrade on Manquillo.

I've got four and will attest to the old adage that you'll likely be more lenient and nonchalant about these things based on how many kids you've got. Used to walk a solid 3/4 of a mile to and from school unattended. Funny that I couldn't imagine letting my own kids do the same, but we grew up in different worlds. Still see it though. My daughter's pal is one of ten (no word of a lie) and before we moved she'd often turn up at the door with her siblings and they'd all play in the garden, which was fine like, until she turned up her (then) youngest sister who was still a toddler in nappies. Two. It's no like they lived next door either. (copied and pasted from Mumsnet).

How’s about them apples @RobinRobin?

You work in the private sector now mate, you don't need to justify "late lunch breaks" taken at 4pm to watch Netflix anymore. If you still worked for the NHS though I would have come down on you like a fucking TON OF BRICKS for this bullshit.

Well done Niall and Biffa. Nail on head and a tear in my eye.

One and the same Fish

He could sell them to Gemmil.

I’m disappointed in the theme music composer, I thought he came from a better family than that.

Those 2 games against Man U and Spurs were the most impressive of the whole campaign. All that pressure of playing against top 4 rivals near the business end of the season, and yet to look so confident, and dominate the games - I can’t think of anything like it in the last 20 years.

Personally, I quite like Andersen. He would see his signing well. He doesn't seem like a very different footballer to Schar to me and I think that what these graphs basically tell us is that Schar is better in the opposite area because we have scored more goals in his corner shots. The other details are a little lower than those of Schar, but that can also be understood because it is not the same to play in a Newcastle that has been 4th than in a Crystal Palace, due to style of play. I think he could be an interesting signing to be the third centre-back and to play now that Schar is not here. Another option would be to spend a lot of money on a top center back and already trust him as part of the future with Botman and leave Schar in a secondary position. (Everything will depend on the severity of his injury).

What, you mean it isn't?

He probably watered it down for the cameras as well. Im sure "bald nonce" would have been used for a start.

Mbappe had only played 41 senior games before moving for €180m. We’ve got a bargain.

They must be sick of the fucking sight of him.

Luke Edward's £70mil transfer budget is stretching pretty far mind.

Literally trying to drum up support.