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Showing content with the highest reputation since 01/09/25 in all areas
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Someone must have told Kelly it waa fancy dress and he's gone Kim Jong Un. Classic Kelly.19 points
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"Eight consecutive wins for Newcastle putting them up to fourth. Jamie, how close is Ruben Amorim to turning it around and getting 'United'© challenging for champions league football?"18 points
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6 years after we lost our infant girl inexplicably to SIDS, the missus and I welcomed a baby boy today. Absolutely elated and terrified in equal measure16 points
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Did you all play twister afterwards? Narrator: "And so after his origin story The Fishman did battle with his arch enemy, Wolfman. The opprobrium was writ large on the face of the senior Fishes as they wondered how it has come to this? Farken." Wolfman: "Ow! Dave you stood on my hand!" Fish: "One could argue, Neil, that your hand slipped under my foot if I were being obtuse, certainly the Xf to Xh ratio would suggest either is as likely as the other."15 points
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Twitter being a fucking hellscape isn't news, but the weird reaction to the reaction of Almiron's transfer is fucking awful. People rightly, imo, wishing him well and looking back on his time fondly. Straight away you've got edgelord cunts calling him shit and being delighted to see the back of him. The lad worked his bollocks off every time he pulled on the shirt, he never complained (to my knowledge), always played with a smile on his face. It's not like he's been sat on his arse, picking up a massive wage while acting the cunt. Don't understand the opprobrium.15 points
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Got to say, haven't been this nervous of a semi since I watched broke back mountain.14 points
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Steve Bruce was manning the phones at 10.30pm on deadline day trying to get a loan deal across the line for Hamza Choudhry. That's the sort of work ethic we need. Time to roll your sleeves up, Paul.14 points
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13 points
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"Dear recruiter I wrote you, but you still ain’t callin’ I left my mobile, my pager and my home phone at the bottom I sent two letters back in autumn, you must not’ve got ’em There probably was a problem at the post office or somethin’ Sometimes I scribble addresses too sloppy when I jot ’em But anyways, fuck it, what’s been up, man? How’s your daughter? I read you'd seen my twitter feed and thought you'd not bother..."13 points
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"IT'S A FUCKING MAG-A-THON WITH LEWK EDWARDS AND DAWN THEWLIS THE FUCKING MAG BIIIITCH! FUCK YOU, LEWK NORTH! FUCK YOU! EFFFFFF TEEEEEEEE FUCKING EMMMMMMM!!!!"13 points
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"Well how was that, Evan? Your first game at the Stadium of light as a Sunderland player, tell us about your emotions?" Evan: "Well to be honest I haven't quite took it alll in yet, before I came up here I was told all about the special atmosphere they can create up here and you kinda think yeah, ok, but you have to actually experience it, I mean, no disrespect to Brighton fans who were great, but when we played shit you'd get a smattering of boos but here? Wow! It's deafening, even if we've done ok but just drawn and let in a late equaliser the whole crowd go crazy, one even patted me on the shoulder when I went down the tunnel saying he hoped I'd fuck off back to the IRA and never play again for his club! When I explained I only came on for the last two minutes as a sub he just carried on booing in my face. You don't get many fans like these up here, they're a special breed, I even thought it was amazing the confetti reception the team got at the beginning of the match but thought it strange when it was still happening during the game but when some blew off the pitch near the dugout I was amazed at how fanatical they were as they'd even utilised stuff like crisp packets and mars bars wrappers to show their appreciation. Even the black opposition striker had a lump in his throat when he saw how the crowd's friendly chanting towards him had moved his watching mother to tears. I'll never forget them when the loan spell ends." "Will that be at the end of season?" Evan: "No, it'll be next week when I ask Brighton to terminate my loan deal."13 points
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been staring at it for 20 mins and i still can't find the 10 differences13 points
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"Get him out fam, get him out blud, I am done with this, fam, GET HIM OUT! You hear me, blud!"13 points
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Mikel Arteta, Arsene Wenger, Tony Adams, Piers Morgan, that fat smug bastard Alan Davies, Osama Bin Laden, Paul "the IQ" Merson, Cry baby Martin Keown, that garlic eating handball cheating Thierry Henry. Jay-Z, Mr DT, the Romford Pele, Ian Wright, George "likes a bung" Graham, Alex Scott. The geordie boys gave you one hell of a beating. one helluva beating i tell you.12 points
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My sister and her husband, lets call him Neil do that. Never forget sitting with them at a Christmas meal and Neil is a bit shy and quiet. So to put him at ease I ask him about LARPing and he tells me that his character is a Wolfman and is the leader of his clan. I ask if that's like a werewolf and he looks aghast "A werewolf?! They can only change in a full moon, I can change whenever I want!" Looked at my Dad for help and he just kind shrugged sadly and refilled our glasses.12 points
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Keegan and Howe, whilst vastly different in terms of personality and methods, are both in the same bracket for me as far as club standing is concerned. Keegan’s managerial achievements here are rightly revered- it was his first management job, and he took us from the brink of oblivion to the brink of ecstasy. It can’t be overstated how he utterly transformed this club -yes, SJH’s money was a necessary factor, and he deserves some credit, but without Keegan none of it would have happened. The sheer joy and pride he instigated, not just in the club but about the city in general, was incredible and we’re still reaping the benefits of it. Given the precarious position we were in when he came, to do it by employing a stingy, defensive approach would’ve been eminently sensible and understandable. But, no - fuck that! He virtually wrote the definition of cavalier football- “ ATTACK ATTACK ATTACK!” Ultimately, for a multitude of reasons, he didn’t get us that elusive trophy we absolutely deserved under him, but… … It doesn’t matter. His place in our history is assured and thoroughly deserved. I fucking love the bloke. Eddie came in with the club in a similar situation at first- The Cabbage had sucked any joy out of both the fans and the players, and we were only heading in one direction- that’s not even open to debate. The joy of the takeover was very much tempered by the stench of Bruce stinking up the place, until he got ditched. If we’re honest, most of us were probably a little underwhelmed when Eddie was announced as gaffer, and the players he inherited were so unfit, uninterested and uncoached it’s no surprise he struggled to get the first win under his belt, but then… …in four months from him taking over, he got us 20 points from 14 games, finished 11th, becoming the first team in PL history not to be relegated having not won their first 14 games. Like Keegan, he gave us back the pride and the joy of not only our club, but our city. He’s done it differently, but no less remarkably- his transformation of BUJ07 from a figure of ridicule in to FUCKING THANOS remains for me his greatest achievement so far, but he’s gone about transforming the club, the players, our style, our respect and standing, and crucially, our expectations in a manner that no one else but Keegan has done. The thing that excites me about Howe is that I totally believe his best is yet to come with us. Keegan’s place in our hearts is cemented in and assured, Howe’s has absolutely rock-solid foundations but is still being built on. And I fucking love the bloke.12 points
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The Ballad of Wykiki "But where do you go to my loveleh? When you're with that Callum int' bed Tell me t' thoughts that surround you I want to look inside your head, yes i do. I remember the back streets of Leeds Two young tykes begging in't rags Both touched with burning ambition To shake off their lowly-borne tags, they try So look in thy face Marie-Claire And remember just who you are Then go and forget me forever But I know you still bear the scar, deep inside, yes you do I know where you go to my loveleh When you're with that Callum in us bed I know the thoughts that surround you 'Cause I can look inside your head."12 points
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So, we are being forced into using ChatGPT at work so I'm now signed up for it. Naturally, I first used it to make a poem about Gemmill. Took 30 seconds. Not a bad effort. The Ballad of Gemmill In a modest house on a quiet lane, Lives Gemmill, bound by the mundane. An accountant by trade, with columns and sums, His life ticks by to the drumming of thumbs. His wife, aloof, with a scornful glance, Dreams of escape, of a wilder dance. She scoffs at Gemmill’s every try, While he avoids her critical eye. But there’s one friend who ne’er complains, Who hums and spins without refrains. His Roomba, loyal, a partner in dust, A bond of circuits, trust, and rust. When day gives way to the quiet of night, Gemmill competes with spreadsheet might. In Excel duels, he sharpens his art, A master of formulas—but not of the heart. With pivot tables, he vies for glory, Yet his errors rewrite the story. Despite his skill, the truth is grim, He’s always bested, Excel beats him. In Toontastic’s halls, he seeks renown, But his jokes fall flat, and his posts bring frowns. A Newcastle fan with misplaced glee, Predicting Everton’s demise annually. “Surely this year!” he cries in vain, Yet Everton escapes the drop again. His confidence fades, but not his cheer, For Gemmill will try again next year. And though his world may seem askew, To Gemmill, each day brings something new. A quiet man with quirks and flaws, Living his life by unwritten laws. So raise a glass to this peculiar knight, Who battles in spreadsheets deep into the night. For even in the oddest, humblest game, There’s dignity in chasing fame.12 points
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Makem. Joined just to post this. Nee rivalry shite here. RIP Alan Shoulder. Lived the dream we all had of playing for his club. Sad, sad day. A good man, and a life well lived.11 points
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‘Right, this Yorkshire lass is a right squirter, hence the need for the goggles. Now I want you to dive right in there and give it your best and for fucks sake don’t rule yourself out for the next eight weeks with a tongue injury like Callum did.’11 points
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aye. my mate from blyth who you've met can't stand murphy, he's dug himself in to such a hole with his stance that he can't even bring himself to acknowledge he's been a revelation of late. I take great joy in texting him.... 'murphy man of the match again today mick? doesn't even bother responding now.11 points
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Will miss him. Favourite Miggy moment. Middle of his hot streak where everything he hit with his left was going in, Spurs away Joelinton bows to polish his boot...Miggy the gormless twat lifts his right foot up. Joey's reaction like, "not that foot man you daft twat".11 points
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You really have missed your vocation in life Well, you probably walked out of it11 points
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Michelle Keegan. That's why he's not responding. He's ripping it off at the hinge with one hand and got three fingers, knuckle deep in his jinker with the other.10 points
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