Christmas Tree

So lets say you've got £5,000 to play with and you've just been sacked and your only alternative is working for yourself. What would you do?

I love going through other poeples work and hate looking at my own. But yes, the creative really wants to get everything in. I used to hate it when the ad agency told me there was no way my 45 second radio script could be condensed to fit the 30 seconds allowed! Luckily I found Gambachini and all my prayers were answered.

Im enjoying it. Its just like a reaaly good film editor who can cut and chop and re-assemble the whole piece into an attention grabbing story. I quite often watch a film and think this is a very good tale, ruined by the editing. Usually not enough! On the other hand it can be really hard for the original "creative" to take as they usually either dont want any left out or like it the way it is, hence the directors cut.

http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=zqDP...XEC9Jp3ZA_3d_3d And you have to love this headline "Hughton keeping his fingers crossed for Stoke match" http://www.journallive.co.uk/north-east-ne...61634-23234835/

Fucking hell man. What the fuck! Lots of different age groups on forums mate. Cant believe many under 25 have watched them. Tonights was the one where they challenge each other to a bike race to Berwick, then pass each other on the back of vans. Brown ale in the water bottles. I'm under 25 and I've seen them! Point made already above by Andrew

Ebay, get them.

Fucking hell man. What the fuck! Lots of different age groups on forums mate. Cant believe many under 25 have watched them. Tonights was the one where they challenge each other to a bike race to Berwick, then pass each other on the back of vans. Brown ale in the water bottles.

On now, if you've never seen it, watch it. Comedy gold.

Ah, after the first 30 or so, you stop dying a little inside and build up a callous. I haven't worked on it much lately. I've been working on this idea I had for a comic book series the last month or two. Got the rough draft done, thought of a better opening and ending, now I'm generating that. My Mac has this program on it called Comic Life that makes it super easy to lay out a comic page. I can't draw for shit, but with Google and this image filter that makes photographs look drawn inside Comic Life, I've somehow managed to make a comic book all on my own (with a lot of unapproved assistance from image sources like the Associated Press). Lols. Truth is like a lot of creative activities, the real pleasure is in doing it, not flogging it. I sat and wrote a story for my daughter this morning in about 40 minutes in between jobs. Great fun at the time.

Sorry for sounding a complete cockend, C/T, but does a writer not have to have grasp of the English language first, to become a writer? Ouch! No. There are many well educated buffoons who may be able to quote and spout very high brow words, but have not a creative bone in there body. You also have to bear in mind the audience, children. Barely out of primary school there vocabularly is fairly limited. They are much more interested in the story than fancy words, hence the fact any idiot can enthrall a child with the re-telling of three little pigs, red riding hood etc. If you can put together a half decent rhyme or Limerick you are most of the way there. Most childrens picture stories such as the gruffalo are only 130 to 300 words long. It's quite amusing that what sent me down this route was Reading a few bedtime stories that were obviously wrote by a wordsmith, but the content was dullness itself. I almost deleted my post immediately after sending it, as it actually sounds far worse than I meant it to. The main point was that if a publisher received a story, or whatever, with poor English they would more likely chuck it in the bin, and move on to the next offer from someone else. As the yank most graphically spelled out, above, there seems a heck of a lot of competition out there!! From what Ive read thats very true. In fact these guys get so many novels over there desks, that most people reccomend that you only send them a one paragraph advert for your story. If the idea seems good, they'll ring you.

CID_mcdp Bloody hell man!!!! Good luck with it, everything I've read lately says that writing the novels the easy bit!!! I'm sure you've been down this road, but the mcmillan link above has a section for submitting unsolicited manuscripts. I'm sure you need to have thick skin getting all those no,s before a yes.

Sorry for sounding a complete cockend, C/T, but does a writer not have to have grasp of the English language first, to become a writer? Ouch! No. There are many well educated buffoons who may be able to quote and spout very high brow words, but have not a creative bone in there body. You also have to bear in mind the audience, children. Barely out of primary school there vocabularly is fairly limited. They are much more interested in the story than fancy words, hence the fact any idiot can enthrall a child with the re-telling of three little pigs, red riding hood etc. If you can put together a half decent rhyme or Limerick you are most of the way there. Most childrens picture stories such as the gruffalo are only 130 to 300 words long. It's quite amusing that what sent me down this route was Reading a few bedtime stories that were obviously wrote by a wordsmith, but the content was dullness itself.

And this site is even better. If your still interested after reading all the do's and dont's your doing well. http://www.shavick.com/getpublished.htm Anyway, sent in a little ryhme jotted yesterday in the taxi and we'll see if I get a reply!

This is the website of Mcmillan Childrens books, publishers of the Gruffalo and many more. Below is a link to their writers page which may be of interest to any budding authors. http://www.panmacmillan.com/Authors%20Illu...er's%20Area And yes, I'll still post when Im famous, infact I might even buy the club!

Everyone here would probably say their dream job as a bairn was to be a footballer, but you need so much luck, focus and dedication. It isn't all about talent, I bet there are people in this forum with more natural ability than some professional footballers, you just need everything to click in to place, not just in football but in any job where there are infinitely fewer opportunities than people willing to do it. My ambition was to be a journalist of sorts, I don't think that could ever happen now, I'd need to go and get a degree for one, and fuck that, but good luck in whatever dream you chase. You don't need a degree. Apart from footie what would you like to write about or have some degree of knowledge about? You needed a media qualification I know that for an absolute nailed on fact, certainly to get a job at Thomson House. Football would be what I would like to write about, or be a travel reporter, I'm not as well travelled as the likes of that cunt on here who's old forget his name, you know who I mean, but who is, I've been about a bit though. I'd be a good news reporter for a trashy paper as well, who need sensationalist stories for non-events. NCTJ qualifications are more important than a degree nowadays but the courses cost upwards of £1000 if I remember correctly. Trouble is even if you have the time and money to do the course the chances of you getting a job in journalism at the minute are slim. All you need is an aptitude for discursive writing and some will power, the rest is cobblers. How I wish that was true I'm living proof. It was possible in the past. I know Jez Robinson, the bloke behind ALS, he basically started off the fanzine with no prior writing experience and ended up working for the local and national press. Nowadays though because jobs are so thin on the ground you need to be well qualified or related to someone with their foot already in the door. I've now done 3 corporate books and working on my 4th, I have no kind of writing qualification whatsoever. What's a corporate book ? A company annual if you like. Normally with high design values (hardback) and telling the story of where a company is, where it came from and where it wants to go. Companies add this kind of output to their profile footprints and use it to engage new client bases or keep the current client base informed of its developing values and ideation. Ah! Marketing then, your right, no qualifications needed!

Everyone here would probably say their dream job as a bairn was to be a footballer, but you need so much luck, focus and dedication. It isn't all about talent, I bet there are people in this forum with more natural ability than some professional footballers, you just need everything to click in to place, not just in football but in any job where there are infinitely fewer opportunities than people willing to do it. My ambition was to be a journalist of sorts, I don't think that could ever happen now, I'd need to go and get a degree for one, and fuck that, but good luck in whatever dream you chase. You don't need a degree. Apart from footie what would you like to write about or have some degree of knowledge about? You needed a media qualification I know that for an absolute nailed on fact, certainly to get a job at Thomson House. Football would be what I would like to write about, or be a travel reporter, I'm not as well travelled as the likes of that cunt on here who's old forget his name, you know who I mean, but who is, I've been about a bit though. I'd be a good news reporter for a trashy paper as well, who need sensationalist stories for non-events. NCTJ qualifications are more important than a degree nowadays but the courses cost upwards of £1000 if I remember correctly. Trouble is even if you have the time and money to do the course the chances of you getting a job in journalism at the minute are slim. All you need is an aptitude for discursive writing and some will power, the rest is cobblers. How I wish that was true I'm living proof. It was possible in the past. I know Jez Robinson, the bloke behind ALS, he basically started off the fanzine with no prior writing experience and ended up working for the local and national press. Nowadays though because jobs are so thin on the ground you need to be well qualified or related to someone with their foot already in the door. I've now done 3 corporate books and working on my 4th, I have no kind of writing qualification whatsoever. What's a corporate book ?

I used to be on a buy-to-let forum called Housemouse in 2003, and there was always one guy (like parky) who predicted the credit crunch / doom and gloom. No bugger ever took him seriously and the forums recently closed, Poor bastard, just when he's finally proved right

And part of the cycle must be growth, again

See I agree totally with this. Until it all started to get silly last Autumn, I didnt pass loads of houses up for sale due to repossession. I know a wide range of people from various backgrounds and wasnt aware of toxic debt. I wasnt even aware of job losses until after it went tits up. So who borrowed all the toxic debt????? Parky If it wasnt the average joe in Britain, then I see no reason why people wont carry on as before when credit frees up. I know people had lots of personal debt, but virtually everyone I know would class this as managable debt. Very confused on who has fucked up. Property prices and job losses in the US were the root cause - banks decided that asset backed securities raised on mortgages were "worthless" which caused a stampede of selling. People like Northern Rock had both deals based on this US stuff and had too many people on dodgy ground here. Again I'd argue the only good reason that property priced fall is confidence. Dont think you can ever go wrong with property as long as your not after a quick exit. Rentals are steadily increasing due to the housing slump (I assume people not being able to get mortgages) and when it does pick up, prices will once again rise. (Subject to having the right location, ofcourse).

See I agree totally with this. Until it all started to get silly last Autumn, I didnt pass loads of houses up for sale due to repossession. I know a wide range of people from various backgrounds and wasnt aware of toxic debt. I wasnt even aware of job losses until after it went tits up. So who borrowed all the toxic debt????? Parky If it wasnt the average joe in Britain, then I see no reason why people wont carry on as before when credit frees up. I know people had lots of personal debt, but virtually everyone I know would class this as managable debt. Very confused on who has fucked up. What you need to understand is that Capitalism survives by borrowing from the future. The future borrowed the money. Will that be Labours election slogan

It doesn't work like that. The game doesn't just stop and then start fresh form 0. My understanding from every media source Ive ever heard on this issue is that is exactly whats happening. It stopped The toxic debt is been dumped Banks are re-financing It will start again

See I agree totally with this. Until it all started to get silly last Autumn, I didnt pass loads of houses up for sale due to repossession. I know a wide range of people from various backgrounds and wasnt aware of toxic debt. I wasnt even aware of job losses until after it went tits up. So who borrowed all the toxic debt????? Parky If it wasnt the average joe in Britain, then I see no reason why people wont carry on as before when credit frees up. I know people had lots of personal debt, but virtually everyone I know would class this as managable debt. Very confused on who has fucked up.

I thought they all spent the last few months writing off all the bad debt so that they could return to making profit this year. Cant remembers which banks were forecasting a return to profits but im sure there were a few here as well as the bank of america. Anyway, my daughter works in a lloyds call centre and she says ....... I was referring to media fabrication, moreover the ferocity with which they increase the reality of the current "big story". IE A child gets mauled and then we have a week of killer dog stories as though theres one on every street.

Mortgage lending has risen for the 3rd month in a row, banks are forecasting a return to profit here and in the US and markets around the world have surged on details of Obamas rescue plan Is this the start of the recovery? Could it recover as fast as it went tits up? Has more been made of this by media? It is the strangle hold on credit that has caused the slump, so as this stranglehold is released, won't we just keep on spending?