Whyowhyowhy

[JawD 31]

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

 

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

 

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

 

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

 

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

 

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

 

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

 

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

 

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

 

What is the speed of darkness?

 

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?

 

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

 

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

 

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

 

Do you cry under water?

 

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

 

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

 

Did you ever stop and wonder......

 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze

these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

 

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

 

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

 

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

 

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

 

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

 

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

 

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

 

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

 

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

 

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

 

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . .

 

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

 

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

 

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

[trophyshy 6490]

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

babies can sleep through just about anything as their sleep is so essential

 

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Because sometimes it eventually works

 

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

semantics

 

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

becasue they can check the latter

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

I don;t know if they do, and cannot check.

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Fashion - he's a fictional character.

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

in case when the gun hits him it fires a bullet at someone else?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

in case they miss..

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

good one.

What is the speed of darkness?

zero?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?

No, silly

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

nonsense question

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

helping you

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

google it tbh

Do you cry under water?

yes, have done so :'(

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

we're not as smart as we think we are.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

for the novelty

Did you ever stop and wonder......

 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze

these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

I think we knew what was happening by observing their offspring milking

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

probably happened before language tbh

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

in case you have frozen toast that is twice as frozen as the average.

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

don't know, you got me there.

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

because that's ridiculous

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

politeness

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

they are fictional characters.

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

yes they do.

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

testing

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Mineral Oil

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

no

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

they don't

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . .

 

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

what is the full effect?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

yes, I have thanks.

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

It makes the doors close quicker at my work.

 

Thank you for these, yes I am bored. That is all.

[Guest Patrokles]

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

babies can sleep through just about anything as their sleep is so essential

 

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

Because sometimes it eventually works

 

Why do banks charge a fee on "insufficient funds" when they know there is not enough?

semantics

 

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

becasue they can check the latter

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

I don;t know if they do, and cannot check.

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Fashion - he's a fictional character.

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

in case when the gun hits him it fires a bullet at someone else?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

in case they miss..

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

good one.

What is the speed of darkness?

zero?

Are there specially reserved parking spaces for "normal" people at the Special Olympics?

No, silly

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

nonsense question

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

helping you

Do married people live longer than single ones or does it only seem longer?

google it tbh

Do you cry under water?

yes, have done so :'(

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

we're not as smart as we think we are.

Why do people pay to go up tall buildings and then put money in binoculars to look at things on the ground?

for the novelty

Did you ever stop and wonder......

 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze

these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

I think we knew what was happening by observing their offspring milking

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

probably happened before language tbh

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

in case you have frozen toast that is twice as frozen as the average.

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

don't know, you got me there.

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

because that's ridiculous

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

politeness

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

they are fictional characters.

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

yes they do.

If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

testing

If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

Mineral Oil

If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

no

Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune?

they don't

Stop singing and read on . . . . . . . . .

 

Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

what is the full effect?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

yes, I have thanks.

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

It makes the doors close quicker at my work.

 

Thank you for these, yes I am bored. That is all.

 

Wow. Mr. Buzzkill.

[JawD 31]

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

 

 

Actually...

 

0'C is 32'F so, twice 32'F would actually be twice as warm so twice as cold could be 32/2 and so 16'F = -8.8'C ?

 

Yes, bored also.

[Howay 12496]

My freezer has a light on it

[Guest alex]

Trophyshy's answers were quite funny I thought. The OP wasn't really as I've seen it before.

[JawD 31]

Trophyshy's answers were quite funny I thought. The OP wasn't really as I've seen it before.

 

Which is what I said in my title fuckface

[Guest alex]

Trophyshy's answers were quite funny I thought. The OP wasn't really as I've seen it before.

 

Which is what I said in my title fuckface

You're right, it went without saying really

[JawD 31]

Trophyshy's answers were quite funny I thought. The OP wasn't really as I've seen it before.

 

Which is what I said in my title fuckface

You're right, it went without saying really

 

 

 

 

[RlCO 0]

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

...Sleeping babies are possibly subconcsiously associated with calmness, possibly through some notion of peace through lack of worry. After all, do you remember being overly worried as a baby?

 

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

...Due to certain designs of remote control button, it is possible to partially depress the button without making electrical contact, so why not save your self the time of batteries that might work anyway?

 

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

...Whether there are or are not 4 billion stars is pretty unconsequential to most people, therefore they have nothing to gain by not believing it, however, knowing you can sit down or lean against a wall can be important to some people.

 

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

...Needles are supplied sterilised from the manufacturer. Used needles are unsafe to non death row inmates therefore would not be kept for re-use, meaning every needle used would be new and hence sterile.

 

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

...Superman, as his alter-ego Clark Kent, needed to be able to pass off being human quite well. It is possible that he has developed human like reflexes as a result of this requirement, and finds it hard to break the habit when in tights. Also, humans would never normally duck to avoid a bullet either, which ironically is something Superman could do.

 

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

...Kamikaze pilots wore helmets to ensure a successfull mission, wearing a helmet increases your chances of surviving an anti-aircraft air burst weapons, the primary defence against airplanes during World War II.

 

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

...As an aid to comprehension of the concept, the onomatopoeia 'lisp' is actually a useful aid to conveying and learning the concept being described.

 

What is the speed of darkness?

...Darkness by definition travels at the speed of light.

 

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

...That would depend on the prevailing mean temperature of the region inhabited at the time of the imperative statement, i.e. in january in Newcastle, this could merely mean tomorrow it will be minus 2.

 

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

...Altruism is a complex concept that has its supporters and opposers in the fields of evolutionary sociology, some would no doubt feel that the statement requires clarification to separate the relevant interest groups, and would thus contest this is an over-simplification of what is quite a complex problem.

 

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

...The addition of wheels to luggage actually involves quite considerable expense and manufacturing/design effort for private companies, difficult to justify in the climate of post-war manufacturing without the driver of independant invention by a competitor. This contrasts quite differently with state sponsored scientific endevour with access to unlimited budgets and war driven rocket research.

 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze

these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

...Probably the same person who saw that baby calves derived nutritional value from the same activity, in much the same way that human babies suckle on their mothers, on an edible white substance. Although there is scope for an unfortunate analogy to be made in certain areas, like Sunderland.

 

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

...Probably the same person that saw a stoat/fox/bird derive nutritional sustinance from breaking and eating said object. Raw egg is a very abundant source of nutrition in the harsh climate of pre-historic times.

 

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

...The same physical process behind making edible toast has the side effect of burning already dried out bread. The problem is better phrased as a timing issue, whereby it is possible that the makers of toasters see the design value of having a static time component in the toasting procedure, and the highest setting may be to allow the making toast from sodden/partially frozen bread.

 

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

...The issue is with the particular designs of low voltage bulbs that would be able to work in freezing conditions. Designs do exist but are currently unsuitable for economic use in domestic freezers. Also, due to the long life of most items in a freezer, consumers tend to stuff their freezers full to the brim, negating the need for a bulb.

 

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

...It is common for people to walk around with a watch on their wrists, therefore the intended connection between unspoken thought through gesture is easily made, whereas the lack of such an obvious connection between a toilet and your bottom is not so clear cut, therefore requiring verbalisation and negating the value of an unspoken gesture.

 

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

...It is a common social norm that people should feel uncomfortable getting undressed infront of relative strangers, which doctors would normally be, whereas the nudity during a medical exam is expceted and accepted, therefore doctors wish to avoid further instinct induced embarrasment from their probably already uncomfortable patients.

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

...It's a question of anthropormisation and characterisation, Goofy was intended as a main speaking character, whereas Pluto was more of a companion, better fitting the accepted norm of dog like behaviour.

 

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

...It's a question of when the blindness manifested itself, if it was a case of congenital blindness, then there is no mechanism to say that a person sees, as there is no reference for the subject, plus the brain has not developed to see either, or the optic nerve is missing. If blinded after birth, it is perfectly normal to see in dreams.

 

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

...It is likely a behavioural rather than instinctive reaction, dogs can interpret the closeness of blowing in their face as an aggressive action, given their non-verbal mode of communication, whereas when hanging out the window there is no immediate threat so they can enjoy whatever they get from this behaviour.

 

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

...No, although often humans can project human qualities onto physical entities, thereby expecting a human response by a machine to a human imperative. If you were poked repeatedly your response would change wouldn't it?

[trophyshy 6490]

Why is it that people say they "slept like a baby" when babies wake up every two hours?

...Sleeping babies are possibly subconcsiously associated with calmness, possibly through some notion of peace through lack of worry. After all, do you remember being overly worried as a baby?

 

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are flat?

...Due to certain designs of remote control button, it is possible to partially depress the button without making electrical contact, so why not save your self the time of batteries that might work anyway?

 

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?

...Whether there are or are not 4 billion stars is pretty unconsequential to most people, therefore they have nothing to gain by not believing it, however, knowing you can sit down or lean against a wall can be important to some people.

 

Why do they use sterilized needles for death by lethal injection?

...Needles are supplied sterilised from the manufacturer. Used needles are unsafe to non death row inmates therefore would not be kept for re-use, meaning every needle used would be new and hence sterile.

 

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

...Superman, as his alter-ego Clark Kent, needed to be able to pass off being human quite well. It is possible that he has developed human like reflexes as a result of this requirement, and finds it hard to break the habit when in tights. Also, humans would never normally duck to avoid a bullet either, which ironically is something Superman could do.

 

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

...Kamikaze pilots wore helmets to ensure a successfull mission, wearing a helmet increases your chances of surviving an anti-aircraft air burst weapons, the primary defence against airplanes during World War II.

 

Whose idea was it to put an "S" in the word "lisp"?

...As an aid to comprehension of the concept, the onomatopoeia 'lisp' is actually a useful aid to conveying and learning the concept being described.

 

What is the speed of darkness?

...Darkness by definition travels at the speed of light.

 

If the temperature is zero outside today and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow, how cold will it be?

...That would depend on the prevailing mean temperature of the region inhabited at the time of the imperative statement, i.e. in january in Newcastle, this could merely mean tomorrow it will be minus 2.

 

If it's true that we are here to help others, what are the others doing here?

...Altruism is a complex concept that has its supporters and opposers in the fields of evolutionary sociology, some would no doubt feel that the statement requires clarification to separate the relevant interest groups, and would thus contest this is an over-simplification of what is quite a complex problem.

 

How is it that we put man on the moon before we figured out it would be a good idea to put wheels on luggage?

...The addition of wheels to luggage actually involves quite considerable expense and manufacturing/design effort for private companies, difficult to justify in the climate of post-war manufacturing without the driver of independant invention by a competitor. This contrasts quite differently with state sponsored scientific endevour with access to unlimited budgets and war driven rocket research.

 

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze

these pink dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?"

...Probably the same person who saw that baby calves derived nutritional value from the same activity, in much the same way that human babies suckle on their mothers, on an edible white substance. Although there is scope for an unfortunate analogy to be made in certain areas, like Sunderland.

 

Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there... I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's bum."

...Probably the same person that saw a stoat/fox/bird derive nutritional sustinance from breaking and eating said object. Raw egg is a very abundant source of nutrition in the harsh climate of pre-historic times.

 

Why do toasters always have a setting so high that could burn the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat?

...The same physical process behind making edible toast has the side effect of burning already dried out bread. The problem is better phrased as a timing issue, whereby it is possible that the makers of toasters see the design value of having a static time component in the toasting procedure, and the highest setting may be to allow the making toast from sodden/partially frozen bread.

 

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

...The issue is with the particular designs of low voltage bulbs that would be able to work in freezing conditions. Designs do exist but are currently unsuitable for economic use in domestic freezers. Also, due to the long life of most items in a freezer, consumers tend to stuff their freezers full to the brim, negating the need for a bulb.

 

Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their bum when they ask where the bathroom is?

...It is common for people to walk around with a watch on their wrists, therefore the intended connection between unspoken thought through gesture is easily made, whereas the lack of such an obvious connection between a toilet and your bottom is not so clear cut, therefore requiring verbalisation and negating the value of an unspoken gesture.

 

Why does your Obstetrician, Gynaecologist leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

...It is a common social norm that people should feel uncomfortable getting undressed infront of relative strangers, which doctors would normally be, whereas the nudity during a medical exam is expceted and accepted, therefore doctors wish to avoid further instinct induced embarrasment from their probably already uncomfortable patients.

 

Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

...It's a question of anthropormisation and characterisation, Goofy was intended as a main speaking character, whereas Pluto was more of a companion, better fitting the accepted norm of dog like behaviour.

 

Can blind people see their dreams? Do they dream??

...It's a question of when the blindness manifested itself, if it was a case of congenital blindness, then there is no mechanism to say that a person sees, as there is no reference for the subject, plus the brain has not developed to see either, or the optic nerve is missing. If blinded after birth, it is perfectly normal to see in dreams.

 

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at

you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

...It is likely a behavioural rather than instinctive reaction, dogs can interpret the closeness of blowing in their face as an aggressive action, given their non-verbal mode of communication, whereas when hanging out the window there is no immediate threat so they can enjoy whatever they get from this behaviour.

 

Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

...No, although often humans can project human qualities onto physical entities, thereby expecting a human response by a machine to a human imperative. If you were poked repeatedly your response would change wouldn't it?

 

what you doing on Friday night, hotstuff?