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Don't call it a comeback We've been shit for years Worst team on the River Wear Puttin' clean seats at the SoS in fear Makin' the tears rain down like a monsoon Listen to the half empty stadium go boo Adam Johnson, overpowerin' In front of the Paedo Hunters he's cowerin Wrecking the chicken shop when I write these lyrics That'll make you call the Canny Cops Competition's payin' the price I'm gonna knock you out Reiver said knock you out I'm gonna knock you out Danger Nonce said knock you out I'm gonna knock you out That cunt who shat on his seat said knock you out I'm gonna knock you out Word to your Mother. She's also your sister

that's reiver that is, on loan from penelope cruz. on the 70s he singlehandedly took both the leazes end and the holgate on the same day. even now at the age of 104 he strikes fear in the hearts of their bitter rivals firms, the portsmouth 6.57 crew and the coventry city legion. even jimmy hill's statue trembles. by virtue of being the hardest man on the planet reveir ensures that despite being a destitute, lower mid table 3rd division club, sunderland are still one of the biggest and best loved institutions in the world.

Please don't thank me, I literally didn't mean a word of it.

When I'm alone in my room Sometimes I stare at the wall In the back of my mind I hear my conscience call Tellin' me I need a girl who's as sweet as a dove For the the first time in my life, I'm seeking 14 and above There I was, giggling about the games That I had played with many hearts and I'm still chanting AJ's name

Actually I'm making a slight correction. 1 in 8 chance of it being a specific individual, so 12.5% chance. Then there's a 1 in 7 chance of it being the next individual which is a 14.3% chance. Multiply the two to get the chance of it being those two individuals specifically. Which is 1.79%. I think that's right but I'm doubting myself and I'm just back in from the work Christmas do, so I wouldn't base a tribunal claim on it.

Well I have to say you're made your point quite eloquently by your standard......

“ What do you want for pudding, dear?” ” fucken crisps”

Also nice to see Gallagher not forgetting the SAFC/Man City friendship* now that they're a million miles away from each other. *One of the many football alliances Sunderland have with other clubs. (No way he'd ever consider a Mag for a bouncer. FTM!)

got a mention on pointless earlier. in football clubs starting with the letter 's' they scored 12. 10 fewer than the mighty southend. still, they've got the fact that somebody liam gallagher has a passing acquaintance with sports a sunderland tattoo keeping them in the spotlight. which is nice for them.

Don’t want to be getting him excited, try this instead…

Fuck off

So according to RTG, the next season of their Netflix comedy series will be called "The comeback". That is brutal

Anybody good with maths? Lets say I'm a bitter cunt and that i'm in the process of pointing out that the only 2 retained employees of a pool of 8 that have been made redundant are the only 2 employees that are friends with the boss on Facebook. I want to know what the probability of this happening would be if it was entirely random?

So, why doesn’t he spend that sort of money every season, you thick cunt?

SIX Finger Death Punch?

I think the odds were shorter than Bruce having a takeaway for his Christmas dinner

Afraid so - it will be the uneducated ill-informed voters, again

He's got much firmer buttocks.

I mean this is the same Liam Gallagher who paid tribute to the Longstaff brothers a couple of weeks back at his gig and literally wore a Newcastle United shirt once....that guy? Absolute MLF

Alreet Yoda, settle down.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2019/dec/19/white-house-trump-just-riffing-joke-congressman-hell-john-dingell It‘s shocking how he always gets away with stuff like this. Presidential my arse.

Worst comeback since Jimi Hendrix’s vomit

LL Cool J

First time I've even seen this. Fuck me.

More arm room for wanking in a van maybe?

Wanker

He fucking is.

Presumably catching a flight to Rotterdam for a three-way?

Wykiki isn’t that bad, Gloomy.

Nice to see Gallagher’s environmentally aware by recycling his mam’s old tea towels.

that's a no then

Social media awash with scorn for 'sloping toilet' https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/technology-50835604 Wipe Out the Sitters! ( pun absolutely intended.).

If we use the Tory way of counting 'rough sleepers' though, its a lot less. I.e they drive around, if they dont see anyone, then they're not there. Callous bastards. This year me and my wife are giving money to a Homeless charity in Leeds instead of buy presents. We have also done an advent calendar where we put a couple of quid away each day and then give them the money at the end of advent. My wifes gone into work and done the same and her company are going to match what she's got. Between us at Christmas we will be giving them £2k so pretty pleased with that. Especially on days like today where it's baltic.

Educationally subnormal is the term I use. None of my friends have ever complained - they're too thick.

You fancy her don't you?

Classic misogyny. "She's too emotional to govern". Disgusting. She's Wigan born and bred. She didn't even cry as a baby.

Boris will claim it's Labour's fault for not stopping him, and the BBC will start talking about how ineffective the opposition was at a time of great national peril - and how only Boris can be trusted to do the work of both the government and the leader of the opposition.

AKA Lady Gaga syndrome.

Don’t worry, everyone else did too

Takes some doing to simultaneously be that weird and that boring