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Am quite proud of this one:

The black cats crept into crypto, crapped and crept out again.

“Our transfer budget will be based on our Crypto, so we have a budget of £100m… Oh now £1m… yep back to £20m…. A fiver… actually we’re now bankrupt”

I gave what I think is a thoughtful and considered reply to that thread

The Bender Squad

No you don’t. We’ll chalk this up to being emotionally drained by the Everton debacle.

Peytar Reid’s gotta a monkey NFT, a monkey NFT…a monkey NFT 🎶🎶🎶

I like how JUST as we were taking the piss something funnier happens

This is funnier than I could have imagined Crypto ffs

You best believe I'm getting one of these little beauties.

“I want ever single Londis on wearside fully stocked up with blue pop and white lightning…then make up some kind of takeover rumour & see what we can sell...blokes from then UAE or something…We’ve just invested in a pet crematorium so the more the staffies are given the better”

Woeful performance. No strategy in place. Constant blaming of predecessors/ outside forces while harping on about some apparent ‘successes. Embarrassing media interviews. Wasting what little money there was on stupid ideas. Absolutely no hope in Europe. Those backing him because they think that in not doing so means having to ‘switch sides’. And he’s STILL claiming it was all a success in interviews today. Steve Bruce, ladies and gentlemen. ( sorry wrong thread )

“how Kay-ul fuckin love yee marra, will yar mind signing me staffies collar? Callum loves yeee an arl like”

@Dr Gloomdisapproves of this tweet.

Err… author, don’t forget author.

you don't appear on geordie actor and entrepreneur steve wraith's latest podcast if you're in meltdown

I hear his daughter is on this years Love Island.....

Wonder who at the Telegraph did that transfer round up.

Never thought that Gandaft would actually be the better option for them, but here we are 😂

So it’s basically Gandaft vs an NFT Ape in the battle for Sunderland.

all they wanted to do was talk about their beloved Wimpy sausage in a bun. mean thats what hooligan firms are for

“ I at least guessed first” “ It was a work event” Pitiful

I don’t

He just kips on a case of Rich Energy, with all the unsold packs of Wolf Jerky for a pillow.

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2022/jun/07/rebel-tories-plan-vote-strikes-to-capitalise-on-pms-weakened-position @Renton @PaddockLad Shit, looks like you lads were right and the rebels are falling into line. Oh no wait DUZZITFUUUUUUUUCK. Looks like the BIG G fucking NAILED IT again. He's done. I expect full apologies from you both.

A man after your own heart!

Iota 1: "Fukkin sicka mags on eeya tryin to get us to buy Pacqetta De Krisps!" Iota 2: "It was me who said it! You carllin me a Mag?" Iota 3: "Neyed to pack this in yew tew, Mag beyhavia this." Iota 2: "Who asked yew, iota 3?" Iota 1: "Right, iota 2, ahll seh ya outside the windmill, seh if yal saya that to me fayace." Iota 4: "Ahd fukkin pummel the lot of ya, just like that mouthy mag ah wuz telling ya about that ah twatted on holida in Rome." Iota 2: "Ya reckon, iota 1? Ya cuddint put the cat out never mind knock me out!" Iota 3: "nar, iota 2, it was iota 4 that said that, marra!"

“Arr lads we cannit afford neeee more man, waaaah doge coins gone down the pan cause everyone’s had to sell it to get their staffies buried after drinking that blue pop like”

'.....one iota.....' Is this a massive piss take?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAJA

"Start some rumours of a Sunderland takeover to excite and agitate the locals on Wearside. The more frothing at the mouth, the better." "I can get one of our contacts to add a nominal sum on the companies house website so it looks legitimate?" "No need for that, it'll just confuse them. Just put an anonymous post on Facebook from a compromised account with 'FTM' at the end. That'll suffice." "I'll get on it." "Also, while you're doing that, put out a rumour that Take That have snubbed SJP in favour of the Flatpack of Shite."

First Elton John, and now Ed Sheeran. How will we ever get over the superstars flocking to the Stadium of Litter?

goes without saying

She's the gift that keeps on giving

The likes of Rees-Mogg and Dorries think they're being clever by calling their own colleagues out not realising it's alienating and damaging their party further. It's utterly hilarious.

Pornhub is a bit vanilla for me, tbh.

Apparently May was told to name a date for her resignation or the rules would be changed. Now these blokes will clearly treat Johnson differently but eventually it'll come to this, especially if he's lost the two byelections and the investigation turns up more wrongdoing.

New members?

After however long it’s been since this, time for an update. My workplace got so toxic that it eventually just exploded, ended up with new management but nothing really changed enough to warrant staying. So, today, as I sit in 30 degree Kos heat with a (fabulous) Pina Colada, I’ve just got a call offering me a new job, with a hefty pay rise and more senior position to boot. Happy fucking holidays

thank u m9

I imagine it’ll be pretty boring experience for Tyrone