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It's gonna be a big night for him!

"eeah, that mafiosa ya met in New York has come to visit wa, Billy!" "Gerrin! Ahll invite'm for tea. Mak him spaghetti Bolognese as they're Italian Americans and they luv it!" "Ahm on it now!" (Goes to open tin of lidl spaghetti hoops) "What ya doing, man! Eeh wants the propa stuff, man, not that cheap shite! Go down to Sainsburys and buy their tin of spaghetti Bolognese, instead!"

"We own an acting agency in New York for extras and such like if I remember correctly?" "Yes, 'N-E-Schmuck-will-do' I believe?" "Good, get me the cheapest American-Italian actor you can get and tell him to watch out for any wandering Wearside tourists. Instruct him to let on he's a made man and that John Gotti and his successors are 'connected' with Sunderland AFC. Spin them a line about a phoenix or some such shite that they'll lap up." "I think we can manage that, no problem, sir." "Excellent, I love it when a plan comes together." "That's the A team, sir." "Ooohh! The fucking balls on this one!"

I bet he's a fucking vegan, the little skinny suck-job.

ORLY?

I'm guessing that's Tindall on the right after enjoying a 'bit' of summer sun.

Seeing Ghodoussi and Ashworth pictured with new players is, unsurprisingly, a lot more reassuring and professional looking than having Penfold and the Hamburgler McBacontits hanging off them.

The bit about the bar not having a Sunderland top on the wall certainly rings true

I'm sure the famously well dressed, pernickety about their appearance, mafia would be all about some fat cunt walking around in his Sunderland top. Why do they do this to themselves?

Took place in Lidl during Italian week

Nice work Craig. 3 sets of 20 pelvic thrusts today.

I’m not sure what is more far fetched….that a mafioso would have any knowledge of or interest in SAFC, or that this idiot has travelled further than Washington Services.

Hope it went well. Must admit the sheer terror of contemplating dating again is one of the main factors in stopping me getting divorced.

Holly molly!

Ekitike turned us down because he’s a MLF, he’s just waiting the next takeover when there will be billions to spend, my mate met him on holiday and reckons he thinks theyre bigger than Barca, FTM six in a row

fake tash tosser

“ Got one over on some Maggie bastids last night- spent the entire night pretending to be one of them…”

Fuck's sake. Your geography is worse than your Everton prediction 🙂

The best part is, you can pretty much guarantee that none of the above actually happened

The Mafia crack is absolutely a subconscious attempt to brag about how hard they are as a fan base too

I’m waaay too pleased they’ve actually done that than I should be.

FYP

Quiff was a mackem all along?

Should bathe in sanitiser tonight.

Downie looking utterly perplexed

Fist Jnr is still having daily coughing fits from it despite testing clear over a month ago. I’ve told the little shit if he doesn’t shape up sharpish he’s going up for adoption

Johnson's new head of comms is absolutely crushing it again. Btw Johnson's new head of comms is quoted this morning as saying that people should think about how Chris Pincher feels in all of this. The man who we're told has for years been known as Arse Pincher, and who in 2017 was described a pound shop Harvey Weinstein. And we're supposed to believe that Johnson was unaware of all of this when he kept giving him govt jobs. They've fucked it. Again. This isn't gonna go away. There'll be more stories to come about this sex pest and if it lasts a week or two, the by-election is coming. They NEVER fucking learn. His default position to lie is so deeply entrenched that he's incapable of anything else.

Jacob Murphy given a deal until 2027 good luck shifting him next season

They’re too busy hitting Juve fans with plastic gladiator swords and shouting 6 in a row

I love how their tales abroad always involve either mocking, chinning or putting a Mag in his place or all three combined. It's quite a talent they have.

As well as point how incredibly petty they are in their made up heads.

Even in their made-up stories, like the snubbing a Mag in France one, they have to explain to people who Sunderland are. The stupid fucking cunts.

He's absolutely spot on. If having someone sucking you off, who is not your wife nor partner and who is looking for a role within the office you run, cannot be considered misconduct of public office then what can be?

It’s 1/2 that you’re getting laid next time you see her Craig, good work

Cheers mate. Was date 2 and she wants a 3rd so much be doing something right.

Makes you think about the calibre of people entering parliament. Maybe we just hear about the oxygen thrives like this fucker the most and there are also decent people in the benches but I do think it’s a magnet for all sorts of borderline psychos/misfits/deviants all looking for power and the ability to hide in plain sight so they can try to get away with this sort of shit. The woman who stood for the tories in Tiverton locked herself in a room to hide from the media when the result came through. UK are basically in a proxy war with Russia as we speak and these are the sorts in parliament and trying to enter it ffs 🤦‍♂️ there’s also the likes of some of the 2019 intake who couldn’t dream of earning 80k a year anywhere else. That twat from Nottinghamshire who weighed in on his pride in his local food bank springs to mind, used to be a Labour Party official?

Yes, but who's looking at him?

Same thing happened at a Toontastic piss-up, and yet STILL Renton posts on here.

Genuinely heartbreaking that