Leaderboard

Ashworth leaking Mctominay's name to the press and then chucking £60mil at Tonali instead

I dunno. I thought the logo said Geordie Guts so assumed it was CT.

Just got my Father's Day present off the kids

Botman to Milan? Naaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh we'll bring Milan to Botman!

Evidently Caulkin has said the club have been briefing some Journo’s “off the record” about player targets, but they’re ones we’re not targeting, smoke and mirrors. Wonder if that’s how CN got the Barella story, marvellous if true 😂

I looked it up. It’s from the 1966 film based on the tv series. The shit you remember

Guaranteed he's currently trying to get his deposit back. No one is more annoyed than him that the organiser is currently not getting a mobiles signal.

If you hear 'Club Tropicana' from his BBQ then you know he's made friends with at least one local. You could always just swallow your pride, go over, join in and they'd sharp add 'outside' by George Michael to the playlist.

Is that Renton's mobile?

If it is and there's only room for one Bruno at SJP. His brother can swiftly fuck off.

I think we need a new denominator for transfer fees, at the reported fee this guy is just over 2 Sunderlands

in fairness I know fuck all about him. the red dippers are getting themselves properly wound up about it though, from man city like cheating to tonali being shite, very much in a mackem stylee. that's good enough for me.

Says the Chelsea fan 😂

I hope they had cyanide pills. Or cowies, at least.

Rattled

I think you need to take a look at CT's latest mug, buy it and then take a long sip of shut the fuck up out of it.

CT will be the one swallowing my pride. PS I DON'T LIVE IN FUCKING BOLDON, WALLSEND BOY!

Seems credible.... I'd offer them £25m take it or leave it. Or we'll get him for free in the Summer. Then I'd abruptly close the zoom call.

Does looking at the photos in your old copies of Nuts magazine count as reading?

Fuck it. UEFA and the PL have introduced rules pretty much designed to massively slow down our progress. Do whatever we can within the law to get round it.

Is it him off Strictly’s brother? 🤔

CT’s Mrs. went electric about 30years ago.

One for RobinRobin's collection

Just reminded me of the old Batman series. Batman and Robin were tied to a buoy and The Penguin had fired torpedoes at them. They were saved by the selfless act of a passing dolphin who took the bullet for them, so to speak. Except the budget didn’t stretch to it. So one minute they’re strapped to the buoy. Then the next they’re getting away on a speedboat with Batman and Robin having to explain what happened for the benefit of the viewers

Havertz and Jesus up front for Arsenal

they’re also after ASM, aren’t they?

Put me on Team Gloom. This team had won 1 in 17 before "bazball", and were absolutely dire to watch I've got no problem with the declaration, the test match was one of the best I've ever seen, and will be talked about for years. Now let's do them 4-1

I'm with this, as long as there's no come backs on us legally then we go for it, there's basically fuck all said by the bleeding hearts how the draw bridge has been lifted up by the cunts in situ mid 90s onwards and their plans to keep it that way which is more anti-competitive than anything we could ever do and don't get me fucking started on the 'but we earned it' mewling that emanates from them. Total bullshit. The whole PL thing was just the start of it and it's only been compounded since then. Absolutely fuck them.

There's a house across the street from me for sale, but if the little bouffant headed cunt has any noisy barbecues when I'm trying to read in the garden, he'll be back down south before he knows it.

@Meenzer

wonder if they've spotted rose's blue diamond necklace yet?

Aye. Like I’m preparing a bid for a threesome with wor lasses sisters-in-law.

At the last count we seem to have bid 50-60m for at least 5 players. That seems unlikely. Maybe they're just "preparing a bid", paper parlance for "here's some horseshit we made up yesterday over lunchtime pints"

Preferred his earlier collaborations with Stimpy

Cry more, as I believe the kids say these days.

They are having a sing song to keep their spirits up: We're going to die in a homemade submarine a homemade submarine a homemade submarine

If not dead already (because the thing imploded) they are absolutely going to die in 48 hours max, as they run out of oxygen, because there is no way a) it'll be found or b) it can be raised if it's own buoyancy is fucked. That's not the worst of it though, for the poor (rich) fuckers, they'll be suffering mood swings !!!!!!!!!! Fucking mood swings

Whoah, hang on. He’s from Boldon

Aye. I couldn’t give a fuck about the ‘morality’ of it in the same way morality is virtually nonexistent in football anyway. And I want it to happen just for the reaction tbh

FYP

this is a sean casey story. i think it was casey who broke the story about paqueta getting his kids into school in newcastle

I honestly hope we don't start pulling shit like that. It would (rightly) put us in the pisstakers bracket, and wouldn't sit right. Leave that shit to Chelsea.

And look at your success rate with that! Probably best you keep your soggy kegs out of the transfers thread until after Sept 1.

& Brother in law?