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Oh he isnt attacking free speech. Hes stupid He has completely fucked twitter in the last 24 hours mostly by accident and now hes trying to save face.

You shouldn't talk about kids to singles or couples without them, for various reasons. With other people who have kids, it's like talking about the weather, it's polite but honestly nobody gives a shit about other people's kids.Same with pets, spare me your dog stories please. And careers. And hobbies. House prices. Et fucking cetera. Only acceptable small chat is football for lads and shopping for lasses.

Definitely on the uppers. Resigned from Sainsburys today, which was a Fava beans and Nice Chianti moment* Kids look like they’re decent people, and have a ridiculously healthy level of sarcasm- job done New neighbours are lovely people- the previous lot were sound, I was sceptical that the new ‘uns would measure up. Blown them away, tbh. All told, compared to a while back when I was in a very dark place, it’s all smelling of roses. Happy Days! * I’ve got better graft lined up, which, tbh, wouldn’t be hard.

Neither me nor the current Mrs PL have children. I’ve seen on numerous occasions “mumzillas” ask her how old her kids are and when they get the answer in some cases I’ve seen them almost physically recoil from her. It upsets her a great deal for a variety of reasons. It’s just so horrendously fuckin rude to make someone talk of these things

'So when I moved on to slide 3 the bloody thing went haywire and put last years KPIs on instead but when I mentioned it and apologised everybody had a great laugh about it. You had to there, honest.' Fish's mate......

Not sure what I’d prefer to tbh…children talk or a deep dive into some blokes job history.

I’m away for the weekend with our lass, her two brothers & their partners and children (2.5 and 9 months) and her parents (is their wedding anniversary). Havent had a minutes peace from talking about children since Thursday night, having to play with the older one just because he happens to be a child. Finally thought I had some peace, escaped to a beer garden with my book and a pint. They have no all decided to leave the beach and come and meet me. Fucking kill iz

We’re on it 🏏 Although, being at Lords, drinking champagne, wearing a blazer. My journey to being ‘southernised’ is pretty much complete

Probably shouldn't have brought out the spreadsheets

People who don't have kids either: Want them, but can't have them. Don't want them. It's pretty binary. The former is incredibly hurtful for them, the latter is THEY AREN'T INTERESTED. Either way, it's just not a topic to bring up. People, mainly lasses, who say things like "better get a move on", can just get to fuck. Absolute morons.

I chucked money in his charity pot as well the red suited wearing cunt

Lovely seeing you again and don’t forget to forward me that copy of your cv

Hopefully, purely for the Weirdside seethe

One of my mate's cunt wives got sat with a mate from work and his wife st my wedding. She asked them if they had kids and when they said no, she asked why. I don't know the full details of their story but I know he was always desperate for kids. I don't have kids cos I don't want them and I get bored as fuck when you're on a work call and people are giving it the "you know how kids be!" patter for the first ten minutes of the call. Then things get even worse when they all want to talk about work.

Gone native, for shame. Nee need for that, like. Lad's just sharing a photo.

A bit of a sad day for cricket yesterday with the Windies failing to qualify for the World Cup for the first time ever

You’re one of those weirdos who likes to interact with their neighbours? Thank god we have the Irish Sea in between us.

First time I went to a rave after my first born, I spent half an hour bending the ear of some random 21 year old in the smoking area about being a parent because it was all I’d done for the previous 9 months 🤪

Their dad..... "Are you not entertained, Stawb? The fucking Dambusters couldn't have dropped their bombs with more precision than my eldest dropped his load in the portapotty there, man!"

When your lass first brought the idea up your response should've been.....

The bloke who guessed the Tonali transfer is suggesting we are interested in Chiesa. He would go some way to cheering me up for missing out on Maddison and Szoboslai

Been to see my nephew's this afternoon. My wifes Aunty and Uncle were up who are both 80, They don't have kids and see my wife and her brother as their own. One of my nephews is 9 months old and he was laughing today as I was being daft with him. Her aunty 'Isn't he smart, 9 months old and laughing' What? He's 9 months old FFS. Then my eldest nephew who's 8 next month told me he had sports day coming up. I asked him if parents were having a race. Her Aunty 'No, it's not allowed as they start fighting' Oh and how many children's sports days have you been to? Oh, FUCKING NONE. Anyway, there is a parents race. She was very shocked. Stop reading the Daily Mail you fucking Tory bell.

Better than a beauty contest anyway

Holidays in France will be cheap right now, non?

Andrew Strauss said the atmosphere at Lords degenerated due to the cheaper tickets and the resultant clientele, basically it was the plebs fault, the snobby cunt. P.S. Who told him Craig was there.

Dave bringing out the zingers now

It was the first innings dismissals that killed us. Shame for stokes but lightening was always unlikely to strike twice

Given how close they've got, it brings Crawley, Pope, Root and Brook's stupidity yesterday into greater focus. Even half a score from one or two of them would have been enough.

Pleased to hear it. Was it 'Wise men say' by Elvis?

I know he’s got a tie covered in actual egg and bacon

I hope he’s got his Michael Portillo-style crimson strides on to complete the outfit

I like how it’s not screenshotted, to try and avoid revealing their identity on RTG

It was weird like. The other TMS commentators seemed a bit embarrassed for him. That’s never been a catch in the history of cricket. I thought it was cheating by Starc to even appeal for it. Not to mention poor fielding. Best thing I’ve seen is an Aussie paper saying it was correctly not out but they should change the law so it should’ve been out It’s actually a very clear and simple law and should absolutely not be tinkered with, least of all to accommodate sloppy fielding. If he’d caught it, slid in his knees, stopped and then put the ball to ground as he got up, that would be out. This was all in the same, single motion though. I agree with Sammy that McGrath’s a good bloke but his emotions seemed to get the better of him there.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-11329469/Suella-Bravermans-tofu-eating-wokerati-rant-full.html Not going to derail the thread further but for absolutely clarity for those who don't know my politics, I was taking the piss.

And, in the unlikely scenario it gets to that point, the batsmen will take the bait

I deactivated my account a while back. But I’d been getting the same recently whereby you got the sign-in page when you followed a link. I don’t miss the cesspit tbh. But I’d assumed Musk was trying to force people into signing up.

That, and not putting the ball on the fucking ground. Soon as I saw it, I thought surely that's not out. They'll be at Ducket big time first thing today mind, Starc first up I reckon. Hope it's gloriously sunny and pitch is absolutely dead, still can't see a win though, even if England could get close, Aussies'll go to the packed legside field shortball tactics and any runs will become massively high risk.

FYP

Bunsie broke twitter. We will hopefully see a lot less stupid rumours now.

Honestly thought people might be self aware enough to talk about something other than children, but how wrong I was. I actually don’t mind these two but for 4 days it gets a bit much. They aren’t that interesting, and not everything they do needs to be a spectacle of wonder and amazement. The elder one did a shit in his portapotty thing earlier and shouted “look” when he got off it, no ta mate.

My time came last year at a wedding when I realised that my arms aren’t long enough to be able to read the labels on wine bottles.

Burnsie, the man who claimed to be abducted by aliens is not ITK with regards to his own reality, never mind the inner workings of NUFC. A club that has locked down more secrets than North Korea

I'm going to go out on a limb and say that AH calling for bans is probably not meant to be taken seriously

Did he reply, 'Well do it tha'self if you're fancy lah-de-dah chuffin' structural engineer you fookin' side to side, saddle sore arse, ponceh desktop warrior!'?