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Well if on the next motd Shearer comes out with “Pep really has City fired up, if Arsenal can hang on and win the title, it’ll be some achievement………………and of course, the genocide” he’s definitely clocking this forum

"Hi Alan, it's sky here, are you available to commentate on the Spurs v Arsenal match day?" "Absoloitely and can oi say it should be an absoloitely tremendous match as the North London matches tend to boi." "Errr, well err, if you could just do the forest v man city game after Gary does the spurs v arsenal match that would be really fantastic." "Hello? Hello? Alan? Are you still there?"

I’m Alan shearer’s lost yard of pace

Immediately followed by Ian Wright doing a 3 minute segment captioned "Freedom of Old Trafford" showing how easy it was for Burnley to just walk through Man United yesterday.

I’ll give him the “entertaining” bit.

If only there was a place to recommend what to watch. 🙂

love this lad me. getting on a bit now and have very lucky to have seen goalscorers like macdonald, keegan, beardsley, cole, shearer, ferdinand. something about this kid though, has the ability to be the best of the lot. of all the players we've lost to 'bigger' clubs I'd honestly think losing isak would hurt the most, no fucking club should be able to afford him.

This is vile. As I've said before, it's basically impossible not to wish for awful, awful things to happen to Rishi Sunak.

I am Alan Shearer's hair island

There’s no middle ground for them. You either absolutely despise the Mags. Or you are one

I am Alan Shearer

Why did you have to make me not want him to do it?

Fucking hell, I didn’t realise the bench was that young.

The youth!

Badge kissing cunt* *I love this bloke so much

"Raise warning level to Def Com Brown. We thought we'd gotten away with it after the Black Cats bar blunder, but Grimes has sussed the Frat kid's true allegiance and the placement of the infantry behind enemy lines". "Roger. We'll I instruct the Frat kid to wear an FTM pin badge. Over."

STOP THE FUCKING PRESS! Mid to lower table championship Sunderland YET AGAIN being overlooked by the knackers on sky sports news. Unbelievable, Jeff!!!

Think I might start supporting St Mirren

Still cheaper than 6 gallons of Loyd Grossman’s Chicken Bhuna twice a week, especially when you factor in plumbing repairs and adult nappies.

I wouldn't feel badly towards him at all if he leaves. It's a really short career and his job is to make the absolute most of his talent, not to keep our club and its fans happy. I'll be gutted and it's gonna be a long month to the end of June, but he certainly doesn't sound like someone who's agitating to go. But if someone triggers his release, then he's gonna be put to a decision. And if they offer him double his wage, and they're a permanent fixture in the last 4 of the CL, he'd honestly be a bit stupid not to go.

Here's another brain cell avoider telling it EXACTLY how it is.....

'quality' Young gimps supporting clubs other than Man U or Liverpool hoping for a pat on the head from these cunts, man. I can't wait to be perennial top club and obviously would love to see some of those clubs who are MASSIVELY overrepresented on sky and co be outside the top 6 for a few years.

Howe doing his press conferences in a black hood.

It's a known legend, never knew if it was legit but she's lucky I wasn't older or oh yeah would be going for a pint with a transatlantic HMHM jnr.

I'm done with those pricks. The FACT is that they cheated in the seasons when they should have been relegated but didn't get the points deductions until this season. If we apply the points deductions to those earlier seasons they're relegated. So I was actually right all along. Everton Football Club. Relegated in our hearts.

"One of the most dynamic and entertaining teams in the league at the minute." Not my words. The words of Erik Ten Hag describing his spluttering, faltering Manchester United team. One of the richest, most expensively put together teams in world football.

🇧🇷

It's EXACTLY what it looks like.

His barber is clearly a big Braveheart fan.

These fucking dopes talking about van De Ven being clocked at 23mph again. Aye, he was clocked at 3mph skidding along on his own head by the time Isak had finished with him.

Mate just sent me this, no idea how true it is but it's them all over if it is? 'In 2019 look north did a segment from the complete shit hole that passes for Sunderland’s main station. They interviewed some stupid gurning mackems gloating because they could get a direct train from Sunderland to King’s Cross. 5 years later because of the lack of use it’s been scrapped and they told the mackems to go to Newcastle to get the train from now on. Ha ha'

Gemmill is a cunt. Let's see if Shearer parrots this next MotD.

Other games

In our hearts. Which is where it counts.

We need to get him tied down to a long term deal

Fair play to him in finally calling out the Tories’ mismanagement of the NHS. Just the 13 years after being elected as a Tory MP.

I mean, all of this is gonna look a bit hollow if he's fucked off two months from now. But I've got faith, I think he might stick around. He's got young kids who were born here, he's just bought a house, presumably his wife is settled, his dad is like a local celebrity.

I know we had Wilson and Barnes amongst the subs, so there were a couple of attacking options. But that was still a fucking shite bench for us today. If we get 6th I think Howe’s dove a fantastic job. I wouldn’t mind Villa beating Chelsea either. Just to give us that little bit breathing space. I think it’s better for us long term too if it’s Villa instead of Spurs with the latter having another season out of the CL

Fyp

It's a conundrum, like.

Aye. It looks like the ManU match might decide 6th place, hopefully by then a draw will be enough for us.

"I know we're in a nothing game" "Wonder what the issue is?" He's so close to figuring it out.

'I'm sure he'll be superb as the club he's joining is of course Liverpool football club and they're an amazing club and a top club like Manchester United are. The mind boggles to what he could achieve there.' [Whispering in ear apparent] 'What? He's replacing Moyes at West Ham? You have to ask questions of whether this Slot character can adapt to the premier league, it's all very well beating the likes of Vitesse and Fortuna but what are you going to do against Man City?'

Is this a thing, free poppadoms? I'm not sure it is. Mind, if I don't get free prawn crackers with my Chinese there will be hell on.

came for the poppadom story...stayed for the comments