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Ah well. All good things come to an end, the laughing stops now that the rise of the new invincibles is about to occur and right on our doorstep as well. There'll be a new six-in-a-row soon enough when the new bloke gets his feet under the table. It was good while it lasted. [Sad face emoji here]

So I am currently in Edinburgh, well no, some dull suburb called Prestonpans where there was some fight once apparently, watching my daughter in some gymnastics competition. Up at 6am on a fucking Sunday to get here on time. Anyway, just found out it's done by age so I have 2 hours of watching toddlers bounce on tramplets first.

I mean wenger won a league and cup with Monaco and two cups in Japan and was also coveted by Bayern Munich before he went to Arsenal. So when you think about it, it’s exactly the same.

We wouldn't be doing this if we weren't in a hole on PSR. I just hope the rules get sorted out cos having clubs with no financial concerns do this hokey-cokey every year to meet an arbitrary figure is ludicrous.

I think I've just discovered why Toonpack and PaddockLad don't believe in expected goals.

Twitter is rammed to the gills with people who should be ignored being given an audience

Someone didn’t Hawk Tuah Dougle last night

Rome also has some nice parks. You can buy chilled beer from the many ice cream vans and kiosks you'll find. Grab one and chill out. Like most Italian cities, it's one that isn't overrated. It's fucking amazing. Mind, I went in 2006 or something in a heatwave in June and it wasn't that busy then, Trevi fountain was okay and tbh I'd just do it. Probably give the Vatican a swerve mind as I suspect you'll react like Damian from the Omen being dragged to church and spontaneously combust. Oh, the pizza is great too, same as everywhere in Italy. Ignore Gemmill who wants 3 inches of dough on his Chicago Town.

Just watch Adam Pearson.

Nipples like rivets on an oil tanker.

Aye, I’m prepared to be cattle-herded around the Coliseum, but am I fuck standing 6 deep watching some tart pose for The Gram* in front of a fucking fountain I quite fancy seeing the Catacombs, there seems to be quite a few different ones so I’ll look in to that. I’ve heard from several folk that Roman pizza is a bit shite, Fist Jnr will be devastated * when we were in Brüges , we made it a little game to see how many Instatwats we could photobomb just as they were about to click the shutter- you’d think their duck lips couldn’t get any poutier, but after the third time of me wandering in to frame whilst adjusting the Jewels, believe me, they can

There now follows a political party broadcast by Ray Winstone to the Conservative party....

Miggy contributed three goals and one assist over the whole of last season, Murphy is decent but not top class. RW is the one area that we haven’t improved since the takeover and is well overdue an upgrade.

That time we were after Francis Jeffers from Everton but lost our and got Bellamy instead, this seems a bit like getting Jeffers. In seriousness, if he stays fit I'd have confidence in this version of NUFC getting it right with bringing in DCL. I get the feeling he might be a bit of a confidence player and coming here after the toxicity of Goodison these last few years might see him be an absolute bargain as it could be a huge breath of fresh air, see A. Gordon who looked full of fight there with potential but not what he has become here. Disappointing that we could be letting a diamond away when it's in our hands but he could end up being this decades Andy Carroll, you just don't know? I'm guessing the club have worked it out better than us.

Minteh is completely unproven in England and it’s almost pure profit. That doesn’t mean I’m happy about it but I can see the rationale. It also doesn’t mean we don’t subsequently flog Almiron to a Saudi team whilst getting a serious RW upgrade. I can’t say signing DCL makes a lot of sense like.

We accept your resignation, then, cheers. We’ll give you a week’s notice from now before the Ban Hammer strikes

I'm balanced. Getting paid for fuck all is socialism at its best.

I’m just sat here wondering why Meghan won’t ring her dad? WHY MEGHAN?????

Without the kids anarl? You legend

Nice to see ewerk riding out the cost of living crisis in style

That’s not quite true. Well, actually, not even remotely true. At both spells at Dortmund he has been persistently late for training/team meetings. He was previously dropped by Dortmund for returning late from England duty. Poor time keeping was also part of the reason he was dropped for England before the World Cup in Qatar. He’s quite fortunate that the current Dortmund manager has said he just isn’t particularly bothered about it. Personally I would be bothered about it. To me it’s a clear indicator of poor discipline and motivation and isn’t the sort of character I think Howe would want around the squad. He doesn’t have to be the first in and last out of training but but his attitude doesn’t seem to match the intensity that our side requires.

I’m seeing comments like “devastating” and “this club, man” on X. The kid is completely unproven and never even played for us. Some fans are mental.

It makes sense only in the context of FFP/PSR both of which make little sense. DCL is a good player, if we can get him at a low price due to having a year left on his contract and a patchy injury record then it probably makes sense. Wilson is 5 years older. Despite their similar frames DCL and Isak are very different players that could potentially work ok together, though with our existing system would be used individually. Both Almiron and Wilson will be sold if there is any interest. It's ridiculous that last season out only two strikers were Wilson and Isak. Without Europe it's a little more palatable but still leaves us short if we only sell and replace Wilson. It's a shame really as I feel Wilson has done enough here to play out his time as an impact substitute and potential cup starter (when his body is able) but regulations outside of our control mean that we can't 'afford' to do this.

I vetoed the Vatican when I went with my lass. Trevi fountain is absolutely swamped by tourists and is footballer's wivestastic but still worth seeing. But other than the places you've mentioned, I would say just wandering about and stopping in places for coffee and scran is the way to go. Don't bother with Roman pizza. It's like a giant water biscuit with cheese and tomato on top.

Her dad taught her the technique.

I know someone who’s likely selling an “outdoor sofa”. Needs the cash as he’s spunked his savings on bitchcoins.

You’d think they’d get on like a house on fire then.

Didn’t Matterface used to go out with that turbo babe off sky sports news? The dark haired one? The worlds fucked lads

Yeah, i get why we're doing it. PSR is fucking wank though when we're having to put ourselves in a weaker footballing position to abide by the arbitrary spending rules. Theyve managed to ruin silly season with this boring shit

Aye, Pompeii has been on my list for ages.

On the corner of the canal, looking at this, mostly. There’s a nice little cafe there so you can have a “wee swally “ between bombing runs

Banged flat and covered in barnacles?

we need an upgrade on almiron, right wing contributed next to fuck all last season. seems like we potentially already own the solution but decide to sell him. great idea.

Free The Marras From English occupancy since Newcastle reclaimed it in the 17th century in Boldon (by where they do dogging).

Matterface is the natural successor to Martin Tyler. (That's not a compliment).

Finger Tha Mams

Find the medication

Cracking weather today. Managed to get out in the garden for the first time since getting this gaff thanks to the constant fucking misery water belting down. Bottles of Mythos if anyone cares

Pennywell the Clown.