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My dad was saying he saw CT walking round the estate this morning, chewing on his fingernails and muttering about "... the threat of Wilson Isidor..." and "Luke 'the wall' O'Nien". My dad tried to approach but he just got "DANIEL FUCKING BALLARD" screamed in his face.

That’s the closest they’ve been to a decent coach in over a decade.

If they get promoted they will get a massive cash boost, maybe even become attractive to a rich buyer. Fuck them, a decade in the wilderness is 100 times too short a time. Can't believe what I'm hearing from some posters here.

Would be funny if that fake Chilean cheating cunt Diaz sunk them. He was a hero to them at the start of the season

I really couldn't give a fuck if I never see another derby again. I've loved some of them, I've seen more victories than defeats but these days I'd be just as worried they put one of ours out for a season than anything else they do with the actual football and if they hit lucky in staying up I'd hate to see them given the chance to improve. Also you'd see them being really not bothered at all about the Saudi club during a derby, the cunts had a complete meltdown about us being given a whole end and a shit football ground bar being given over to us, they'd be no bother at all and would treat it as though they were playing Charlton Athletic or Bristol Rovers I'm sure.

It really pissed me off when Derby ruined the Mackems' place in football infamy by breaking the record the cunts themselves had had the decency to teduce further and I for one would relish them having the opportunity to reclaim their accolade.

I did think it was slightly odd that there was a thriving Italian gay scene in Turkey until I looked at the map

precisely this. their six in a row came at a time when for me at least I couldn't have felt any more detached from the fucking abomination of ashley's sports direct fc. I'm far more interested in seeing an end to the league stranglehold the bindippers and man city have over us than I have beating the mackems 7 times in succession. the former will win us a league title.

Going back to show the wife where you were stationed?

We're going to have no fucker left next season Seasons not even over and so far I've seen; Botman to PSG Tino to Man City Tonali to all of italy (or man u ) Bruno to city or arsenal Gordon to arsenal barnes to villa Isak to arsenal or liverpool Big mitch really does have a job on

I have no idea what sort of fettle he’s likely to be in after two(?) seasons of bullshit in West London but I always through Dewsbury Hall was a decent player as well as a Tudor mansion in Shropshire

They should hire you. You’re better than any physio.

It’s transfer speculation. People literally just make stuff up for engagement

These fucking wankers bragging about how many cats they've got when I'm down to zero.

I'm unsure whether you were seeing the band or having a bit of hanky panky with Toonpack.

I’ll let this ride with you being new to football. But every Tyne Wear derby is nerve jangling. Derby’s can so often be a complete leveller regardless of who has the “better” team.

We're fine with the Chinese. A great bunch of lads.

Not sure if this has been picked up already but… they’re having our sloppy seconds

Bit awkward for evening games mind

Brexit voting, run down, Farage rioting Sunderland, fuck em.

https://www.theguardian.com/football/2025/may/14/matt-ritchie-my-dream-is-coming-to-an-end-you-have-to-reinvent-yourself

The FA job will be much more low key for him. No one had heard of him when he last did the same role and it'll be the same again. With England the entire responsibility for the senior teams' performances belong to the managers so he can sit quietly being a rat in the background.

That's my stepmam, you can do what you want with her.

Just be fucking sorry like the rest of us… Did you expect a phone call!

I'd rather have 100 PL footballers in comas than see one Newcastle goal wrongly ruled out because of the linesman going too early with his flag.

Hm. Early 20th century imperial conflict geography clearly not a strong point

Fuck that. We're at the stage where every match we have something to play for whoever its against. I don't need or want the stress of a derby with those troglodytes.

It’s maybe fair to say he didn’t do enough to establish a body of work one way or another. But that in itself makes him seem like a bit of a fraud when he keeps taking a position that is in essence about the long term and doesn’t stay for long enough to be judged based on the tangible outcomes of his performance.

It isn’t ribs. He’s obviously perforated or torn something when he’s collided with the goal. Possibly bowel/spleen/liver and may have had internal bleeding since. It’s normal to keep someone under anaesthetic in critical care after emergency abdominal surgery and it tends to be for the first 24hrs and then they’ll wake him. It’ll be a long recovery though. Wishing him the best.

Left footed as well which we don’t have in midfield. Dont think we should be selling longstaff if we don’t have to, just going off my impressions he seems like a really good squad member and happy to play a bit part. Home grown which we may need for squad registration purposes depending on what Eddie wants to do with the kids. No idea what the money situation is or the appetite for risk regarding transfers though

We’ll have an empty seat on the bench Seriously though, I wish him all the best- it’s definitely the right thing to do, and he’s been a very good servant to the club throughout his entire time here. His purple patch where we didn’t lose if he was playing was at the perfect stage in our club’s resurrection for him to get his place in the XI, we’ve now moved past that and he needs regular games which he’ll get at the sides in the 14-16th place slots like Everton, Man U and Spuds. Good lad, and good luck.

Champion. Go anywhere, wear my USSR 88 top and shit myself in a doorway after 15 pints and 5 curry wursts. Sounds like normal holiday for me

https://twitter-thread.com/t/1922623738387779859 EDIT - thanks @Rayvin

12m ? Fucking hell The lad is only 27 7 Premier League seasons experience (170 games) 5 games in the Champions League 1 goal, against PSG (this year’s potential winners) only one season ago But aye 12m cos we are little Newcastle Some cunt who never set a foot on the pitch for us brought in 30m tmGemmil

Berlin is mega, enjoy it. I love walking through some of the parks and seeing hairy fannies on hot days.

On a serious note, let’s hope the lad recovers well. Very reminiscent of Given’s injury v West Ham all those years ago.

PardewedYP

It was your Mam and that’s not what she got in her face

As we speak their owner is negotiating an extended list of extra chores he can do for his mam to get extra pocket money. Itk’s reckon they’ve hit a sticking point over putting the bins out every week.

Waiting for the Newcastle World headline... Emerging news that Eddie Howe is back in hospital again following pneumonia diagnosis

No doubt the same people who were trying to hound out their manager for being the worst ever will claim he is now a world beater and better than Howe if they get promoted. Only to demand he gets tarred and feathered and run out of town when they start getting pummelled in every PL match. I can't wait.

Try a walking tour, eat some food and go to a few pubs is my recommendation.

Given the season they’ve had it’ll be a travesty if Sheff Utd don’t make it. Reminds me of the only season when we did take part in the playoffs though, be just like Sunderland to spawn it into the top league.

You can stick your derby up your arse sideways, fucking hated everything about it since 1979 and the cunt Rowell hat-trick, felt a bit rough in the morning but went anyway, got tonsillitis missed next game (beat Charlton 5-3 ffs). That said times have changed, they are turbo-shit and we're anything but.

It’s not the lino’s fault because it’s the rules that play should be allowed to continue but it’s fucking ridiculous when someone is so clearly offside in the build up. You felt it was only a matter of time before a player got a serious injury in a situation like that

Yeah the whole point of this sort of job is to create long term football policy and procedures so that you don’t end up being like Man Utd with no long term vision ie sacking every useless bastard they appoint after 18 months and having to pay off all their staff but being lumbered with the eye wateringly expensive useless bastards that they’ve signed….