Matty

Great stuff when Lennon was interviewed and didn't realise they had qualified! His face was a picture! A ginger face.... but a picture nonetheless.

Hot Club de Paris - Who Am I

See True Faith

Wouldn't be surprised if this was made up by an agent to assure his client gets his new and improved contract.

Martins looked decent to me from what I seen. Nice touches and good strength and pace.

Nice coat too, nob head.

That he's a cheating bastard?

Lua Lua.... scored. 2-1 Pompey.

Portsmouth 1-1 Watord.... Portsmouth penalty 90th min.....

http://www.nufc.premiumtv.co.uk/page/NewsD...~930070,00.html

I won £6.70. Get in.

Lazy work shy type, ruining the NHS I tells ya! Half a chance!! I love my job, but anyone who works in my place who says they'd still come to work after winning the lottery is a bit, fat liar! I'd be outta there. I really wouldn't blame you. It's one of the jobs that I really couldn't get paid enough to do, and I admire those that can.

Lazy work shy type, ruining the NHS I tells ya!

I'll buy it off ya for £119m.

Just thought I would remind everyone.... So if one of you puts it on and win now, I want some sort of thank you!

I don't see the joke in it tbh. Just throwing stereotypical insults.

But you read it didn't you.....?

Thinking of taking up this trendy new thing they call football, but not sure which team to support? Perhaps you're a politician with votes to win, or an entertainment artiste who's looking to have obscene songs sung about your sexual predilections... Whatever the reason, Football365 is here to help. Cast an eye over our handy checklist. If you answer 'Why-Aye Man' to five of the ten questions, read on for our 'cheat sheet' and off you go... The Checklist 1) When you're at an outdoor entertainment event and the temperature has dropped below freezing, do you feel an unaccountable urge to strip to the waist? 2) Do you prefer your team to sign a string of trophy players instead of winning actual trophies? 3) Are you looking for a team whose players have interests outside the game, such as perfecting the ability to park a Ferrari upside down on a swing-bridge? 4) Do you like nothing better than spending your time hanging about in an airport, and then posting on message boards that you've spotted Otmar Hitzfeld, Kaka, Ronaldinho, Alessandro Nesta and Gigi Buffon signing contracts in the VIP lounge? 5) Are you prepared to spend an entire midweek afternoon standing outside a football stadium in driving sleet, in order to welcome the new manager whose sacking you'll be demanding in one year's time? 6) Is your idea of a good atmosphere to sit in brooding silence for minutes at a time, before bellowing like a moose in rutting season when the referee doesn't give you that vital throw-in at the halfway line? 7) Do you like the idea of watching football with a fat man's naked belly resting on the back of your neck? 8) Eschewing the new fancy-dan, multi-millionaire playboy chairmen, are you looking for a club with the more traditional type who looks like Clive James after a car crash? 9) Is your desire to fit in with your fellow fans so strong that you welcome a club policy that refuses entry to anyone who isn't wearing at least seven items of replica kit from the club shop? 10) Women, do you sport a fake tan so vivid that people think you're an evacuee from Chernobyl? Men, do you find an F cup pinches a bit around the bosom? Five or more? Well, here you go... Hello...The Phone-In Phrases "Hello, is that 606? I just wanted to say the Geordie fans were fantastic today man, like!" "Hello, is that TalkSport? Alan Shearer was - still is, mind! - the best centre-forward in the country and an absolute legend and always wanted to elbow people in tha heed an' take penalties for THIS club, rather than go somewhere else and win stuff." "Hello, is that 606? Newcastle United are a massive club. MASSIVE, I'm tellin' yez." "Hello, is that Radio Newcastle? Geordie fans are the best in the country. By. A. Mile, man." Get The Accent The simplest way to get the Geordie accent is to eat one of the superheated, scalding pies served at St James', which strip the roof of your mouth and soon have you shouting angrily and speaking authentically. You Are The Pundit It's all about passion in the north east. Look at that sea of black and white. Club History Newcastle United Football Club was formed in 1992 by Kevin Keegan. How To Fit In With A Single Sentence Me fatha's boss's plumber's proctologist drinks in the same wine bar as the instructor what taught the lad Eto'o Spanish, like, and he swore BLIND that he divvent wanta go to Barceler-na in the first place and apparently he's comin' through the Newcastle first chance 'e gets. Patrick McCarthy

Carr and Babayaro have to be 2 of the worst wingbacks in the Premiership and Roeder still thinks they're playing well?! Fuckin' hell Glenn.... shut up please.

Mylene Klass is a hotty though.

Can't stand him tbh. Don't like him even more after he slagged off Little Man Tate! Big no no you pompus twat!

Thought the atmosphere in our end was quality, the City fans didn't make a squeak though. Were you on the bottom tier? Because it seemed decent down there, but I was on the top tier and it was full of kids and people who it seemed had never been to a Newcastle match before...

Liverpool were wank again, lucky to scrape 4th this season, but lucky for them there really isn't another club to challenge them... Spurs maybe, hope not though. Gerrard just doesn't look himself... maybe all the stuff with his wife are true...

Genius!

What's the advantages to this compared to IE?