ewerk 39291 Posted April 24, 2021 Share Posted April 24, 2021 Keep your sex dreams to yourself. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted May 30, 2021 Share Posted May 30, 2021 Met a bloke with no shins at the bar last night. Tony. 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 13497 Posted May 30, 2021 Share Posted May 30, 2021 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trooper 1058 Posted June 28, 2021 Share Posted June 28, 2021 It's very annoying when people act all intelligent talking about Mozart, even though they haven't even seen any of his paintings. 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ayatollah Hermione 17238 Posted July 2, 2021 Share Posted July 2, 2021 What do board game fanatics have for breakfast? DICE Krispies! 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted July 3, 2021 Share Posted July 3, 2021 That’s too bad to even qualify for “so bad it’s good”. 10/10 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrokendoll 14299 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 not a joke as such I suppose, but I thought it was hilarious, watched it 3 times in fact and it improves with age even though you know what's coming. enjoy! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 39291 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 That's it? That's the joke? The fella filming it is a proper weirdo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ewerk 39291 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 Looking at the rest of his videos he appears to be a contrarian twat who goes around winding people up while filming it and wasting police time. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PaddockLad 22516 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 PC Bacon seems OK The individual chatting bollocks into the camera should be fuckin euthanised 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thebrokendoll 14299 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 bunch of miserable fuckers in the morning! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted July 27, 2021 Share Posted July 27, 2021 Old gadgie sitting in his garden sees a kid walking past with some chicken wire… ” Where you going with that chicken wire, son?” ” I’m off to catch some chickens”, says the kid Old gadgie shakes his head and mutters, “ You won’t catch chickens with chickenwire!” Half an hour later the kid walks past with three chickens tied up with the wire. “ Well bugger me” says the old fella. Next day the same kid walked past with some duct tape. “ Where are you going without duct tape son?” “ i’m going to go and catch some ducks at the pond” Old fella shakes his head and mutters, ” You won’t catch ducks with duct tape!” Half an hour later the kid walks past with four ducks all taped up. “Well shit the bed!” says the old lad. Next day the kid walks past with some pussy willow branches. Old lad shouts, “ Oh hang on their son I’ll get me walking stick!” I thangew. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trooper 1058 Posted August 6, 2021 Share Posted August 6, 2021 I had some liquorice late last night. I dreamt about "allsorts" 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted August 6, 2021 Share Posted August 6, 2021 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trooper 1058 Posted September 30, 2021 Share Posted September 30, 2021 Bono & The Edge walk into a pub the barman says "Not U2 again" 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trooper 1058 Posted October 2, 2021 Share Posted October 2, 2021 (edited) Young polar bear asks his dad "am I a real polar bear" his dad replies of course you are I'm a polar your a polar bear we are polar bears. The youngster walks away. 10 minutes later the youngsters back again and says am i a real polar bear his dad replies I'm a polar bear your mams a polar your a polar bear we're polar bears. So off he goes again 10 minutes later he's back again with the same question am I a real polar bear. By now his dads getting pissed off he says look son I'm a polar bear your mams a polar bear your grandad & grandma are polar bears so your a polar. So why do you keep asking the same question. The youngster replies because I'm fucking freezing Edited October 2, 2021 by trooper 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted October 2, 2021 Share Posted October 2, 2021 Mrs kicked me out because she’s had enough of me quoting Schwarzenegger incorrectly. Don’t worry… I’ll return. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 26385 Posted October 2, 2021 Author Share Posted October 2, 2021 7 minutes ago, Monkeys Fist said: Mrs kicked me out because she’s had enough of me quoting Schwarzenegger incorrectly. Don’t worry… I’ll return. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted October 2, 2021 Share Posted October 2, 2021 My mate reckons he’s half Indian. “ No, Ian, you’re not. “ I’m here all week. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Howmanheyman 43974 Posted October 2, 2021 Share Posted October 2, 2021 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sonatine 13497 Posted October 2, 2021 Share Posted October 2, 2021 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinRobin 14520 Posted October 4, 2021 Share Posted October 4, 2021 On 02/10/2021 at 20:43, Monkeys Fist said: I’m here all week. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr Gloom 26385 Posted October 4, 2021 Author Share Posted October 4, 2021 On 02/10/2021 at 13:43, Monkeys Fist said: My mate reckons he’s half Indian. “ No, Ian, you’re not. “ I’m here all week. See gifs above 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monkeys Fist 50776 Posted October 26, 2021 Share Posted October 26, 2021 Felt a bit zany earlier so I dipped my balls in glitter. Pretty nuts, eh, what? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tom 15535 Posted October 26, 2021 Share Posted October 26, 2021 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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