manc-mag

ive met gazza a few times (spoke with his dad alot more) and the guy is great , had nothing but time for you , and could do some amazing things with a football on and off the pitch . we also had twaddle and beardsley from that generation , we could knock out a player up these parts ! I dread to think...

Fucking brilliant!

I wouldn't be suprised after reading the reviews.... Very telling quote too the second one. If it was knee surgery that meant he had lost any semblance of wiping dignity, he must have formerly been a stander. Clearly couldn't stand after the surgery and hence needed a shitty stick for tragic sit down wiping. My heart goes out to him tbf. There but for the grace of God and all that.

I think I saw Craig with one of those at the last piss up-coming back from the bog at Strada. Put it down next to his dessert spoon if you please. I didn't have a fucking clue what it was at the time like, naturally.

Bollocks, you're changing the rules to suit now Standing is with straight back... Fuck off. Standing is holding all your weight on your feet. You're talking about standing straight. I still don't 'stand' even by your theory.... Never mind coming in here 'wisecracking' when you've got winnets like fucking ferrero rocher swinging from your starfish.

Out of the corner of his eye when he was serving breakfast in business class.

There's a couple of girls that orange in my office if the truth be told.

It's probably a low self-esteem issue. It's definitely a co-ordination issue if nowt else. Basically unable to stand and wipe at the same time. You want to see some of them trying to run and control a football ffs. Seriously I'm onto something there-try picking a five-a-side team out of that sitters roll of shame, you're having a fucking laugh.

Looks like Hartlepool tbh.

Not standing to wipe just strikes me as some sort of motoneuron failure tbh. Sat there, collapsed rifling about in the pan ffs. Nothankyouverymuch.

Can I get a witness?

It's a conscious choice you dirty fucking pan-rifler. I've tried both methods and the faces I found myself pulling while wiping sat down were simply un Christian. It's the behaviour of a deviant and it makes you look like Marty Feldman ffs.

If I'd known you'd be sitting down to wipe this week I'd have never let you through the front door you scruffy bitch!

Kept it just for the halibut tbh.

Stop putting yourself down man, you'll never get laid!

Whoa! Check out Dave's nose ring!

How very sad. How the fuck would you know like? Have you worked as a doctor in India? Luke is the new Fop/Rob W Yes, I have. NHS fast track. NHS glasses.

What's going on Fish? Are you doing your celebrity looky likey?

How very sad. How the fuck would you know like? Have you worked as a doctor in India? Luke is the new Fop/Rob W

The stuffs been under the ground for hundreds of years yet in a sorry attempt to make it more interesting they only have a day or two to dig the stuff up. Hang your head in shame Sammy. Fuck off man it's magic. By the end of day three I'm at the vinegar strokes.

Jeremy Kyle is seething.

Could watch hours of time team back to back. Literally hours. What a singularly boring bastard.

Repeated ITV 3 now

There is something ceremonial about standing up to wipe. It signals the end of the shit, which strikes me as just plain civilised, rather than blindly jabbing bumrag at your starfish, while cowering in the crash position and hoping for pot luck.

Bolt upright wiping 10 minutes ago here; could have played the national anthem to it. Absolute textbook.