The Fish

I have no will power

Sheffield were shocking. Not just the system, but the application too. 5 at the back, but left huge gaps between midfield and the back line. We always looked like we had a spare man. But we were ruthless, our set pieces were excellent, Botman and Schar were excellent as was Trippier. They were shit, we were very good.

HS2 would have shaved about an hour off the journey to London from Manchester. As someone who occasionally does that route, I for one am delighted that I am keeping hold of that extra hour to dick about on the company dime.

Thoroughly tempted to update based off the Sheffield result.

Worst midfield passer, still hit 82% mind you. Elliot Anderson completed 93.5%

Tried to give DailyNUFC the benefit of the doubt, but Longstaff hasn't got 99% pass completion at all this season. Which isn't surprising and it's not a criticism of Sean, but this kind of shit gives stat bros a bad name, so I won't stand for it.

Don't test me. I have receipts. Too many pissy pants before the game, the stat bros tried to calm the nerves with some megaton truth bombs.

😂 don't mind me, I'm just drunk. I couldn't be manager, I'd be trying to get the fans to get on board with Segundo volantes and English tapas. All hail Aberfeldy

Called it.

Sheffield should have tried this tactic to keep the score down. Shifting the goalposts like a mother fucker. Me and Gloom said we'd batter these. We said they were shit at defending crosses and set plays. Tick. Sheffield can't keep the ball. Tick. Have a big old slice of humble pie PL.

Not read the thread, but I hope you haven't had a big Sunday roast, because these are a LOT of words you need to eat. A LOT of words.

Sheffield scored with their solitary shot on target, they had 21% possession, had 69% pass percentage, they faced an xG of 3.6 and a post shot xG of 2.5, they completed 3 passes within 20yds and Man City completed 22. Man City had a 3.6 xG and a post shot xg of 0.4 Any other day and Sheffield would have been lucky to get 0

Honestly, I want him to face up to someone who actually held him to account. Not to punish him, just to break him loose from this delusion.

Reckon the difference between Allardyce facing Derby, Bruce facing Sheffield United, and Howe's boys will be that we're not going to set up not-to-lose.

Don't kid yourself. I skipped to the Newcastle bit.

You're moving up the list, sunshine.

55 minutes in, Jordan likens Bruce taking over at Aston Villa after they were relegated, with him taking over from Benitez. Suggesting that the club was a carcrash, a club that needs a rebuild. Bruce 'got none of the advantages and all of the downsides'. That's just fundamentally not the case. We were a well coached, midtable side. He then got £115m on players like Wilson, ASM, Joelinton, Willock, etc. It's just horseshit. And the minute the Saudi option is mentioned, look at him rubbing his hands together. Fucking hell, I hate this bloke.

I hate everyone without prejudice. Apart from my boy and the wife.

There's a bit around 53 minutes where he says that basically, the reason for our 'high expectations" was because Newcastle fans saw their team playing Barcelona one minute and the next they're in the Championship. It was a decade. Not a minute. A fucking decade, and by the time Bruce was in charge it was 2 decades. Our lofty expectations, by the time he took charge were "stay up, maybe play some decent football". That's it. Nobody was predicting European spots, nobody was expecting glory. Just something to be proud of. Also, that thing about cost per pts. Steve Bruce has a career average of about 1.3pts a game. I can't be arsed to work it out at the minute (I might do later depends on how this 9:30 meeting goes), but his spend versus return must be terrible. It must be, his Villa team had the biggest budget in the Championship and he took them to, what, 8th? 12th? something like that. Him proudly saying that he put Joelinton out wide and he played terrifically is horseshit as well. He played 16 games at left wing under Bruce across 89 games, 66 upfront. He scored 0 times from left wing under Bruce, and created 1 (one) assist). Under Howe, Joelinton has played left wing 15 times from 70 games, scored 6 and created 2.

Mostly because of the Scots, Welsh and the Irish. Not a fan of the English either, like.

Oh Lord Jesus, I hope not. Any more feral and we're talking Mowgli/Tarzan levels of wildness. Kid has a Harry Potter scar on his forehead after faceplanting into a log at nursery around 2yrs old. Then 6 months later at a playground he did the same. The second time the wife phones me up and says I have to come get them. She had her car, so I said, just drive him home man. She got upset and insisted I come, so when I turn up I'm expecting a bit of blood and some tears and that. I wasn't expecting to see actual bone. Both times we had to take him to A&E and have him superglued back together.

However you slice the map, I am definitely still in the North. North–South divide in England - Wikipedia

53.356 North, I'm about the same as Sheffield, you ornithophobic orifice