OTF

They may as well bend over for us now so that they can claim a Sunderland style buddy team relationship with us in the future.

I agree, they'll both fit in in their own way with superior offsiders, Shelvey more-so though as he tends to have good vision and will potentially benefit from more space and time on the ball.

Agreed, looking forward to the days when our players with ability don't come with one or more of the below caveats (feel free to add): - He's a cunt - He's a crock - He's a hog - He's lazy - He only turns up once in every 4 games

Wonder if he requested to stay on the bench to risk losing out on a massive pay rise. Once he's officially signed I will discount this theory as our new darling would never do something like that.

It will be nice having a midfield that isn't built on the "cheaper to keep the players we already have that we know are mediocre than buy new better players" methodology. Next stop Dwight Gale, Lascelles, Clark...

Hope he got through it alive.

And massive thanks Ant for all the work and money you've put in over the years, my family would probably hate me if I didn't have this forum to whinge about our dysfunctional club and rid myself of my horrible attempts at humour.

30 million rising to 45 if we win the Football Forum World Cup.

I publically retract my earlier statement about the French (privately it's still true though not relevant here).

I'm going to be positive and believe that he is indeed fascinated by the vision he's been shown, which is quite frankly exciting stuff even in the context of all these piss stained mattresses.

Burn is just a smokescreen to scare Sevilla into accepting our bid (I'd rather Burn tbh for this season).

Careful, they'll come out and state that reports that this is one last attempt to flush out more money are categorically false.

So French.

They've basically agreed the verbal, but not at all legally binding 'get them on the hook' fee.

We're interested in Lewandowski I heard.

Would have been funny if the combined bid was £30m

Yup, there's so many people involved someone guaranteed to blab. Even if it's their agents who are keeping their options open.

Must have worn out his old Bournemouth gear. Can imagine it was a tough decision for Staveley and co when he came back with a demand for a full Castore wardrobe before he would sign.

There's no way in the world that would happen. I don't think we will have a DoF before our fate for the season is determined, understandably so.

Wouldn't want to catch him on his day on. I'd say they both look like they'd slot straight into the cast of Are you being served.

I feel bad saying this about him given his age, but he's a certified fart sniffer and there no way around it.

Big fall from grace for Solksjaer (far right).

I'm actually glad to see Jones looking comfortable and happy. Seemed for a while that he was in a difficult position having been associated with the Bruce era despite being there because Bruce was incapable in every way.

FYP