OTF

"Oh btw guys that wasn't me in that last email, my friend sent it as a joke lol k thx bai Dan"

Talk about giving yourself away as an imposter. At least none of us call them jandals.

I'm sick of these inaccurate cultural stereotypes. It's not gold, it's stone wash blue and comes with nearly matching thigh length denim shorts.

No, three. And I'm in the team victory photo.

I remain undefeated in Newcastle matches attended in person. 100%

There will be one minute of wall tapping in his honour prior to kickoff, and I expect the flags at the MCG will be at half mast.

We've named a very strong 29 man squad for the Australian trip, noteable player exclusions Schär, Longstaff, Tino, Gordon and Dubravka. Even still I don't know if I'll bother to use my tickets or accommodation now that Adam P isn't coming.

No lasagne in the leadup.

Will probably play 180 minutes now

What a season for Bruno BTW, ever present in our side, played the most minutes for us by a large margin and is why we could still nab European football despite an unprecedented volume of injuries. Really important for our European coefficient for Man City to win the Cup now!

Yep!

Maupay, fucking dumbarse dirty prick.

Apart from in Melbourne in a few days mate and then again a couple of days later.

Dummett for his last few minutes in the PL.

Pfft soft as shite.

He's recovered from a groin pull.

Justice

Ffs

Well done Hall.

Fucking hell some finish that.

Rumours abound that he has fallen back in with Howe, and back in to Mrs Wyki.

Lucky he doesn't know the song that most of you pricks sing about him.

This was the perfect demonstration of a clear and obvious error. Now two clear and obvious errors. Who will VAR the VAR?

Also Howe called it a stonewall penalty in the full presser.