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Craig

The Husband Store

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A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the entrance is a description of how the store operates:

 

You may visit this store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the value of the products increase as the shopper ascends the flights. The shopper may choose any item from a particular floor, or may choose to go up to the next floor, but you cannot go back down except to exit the building!

 

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband. On the first floor the sign on the door reads:

 

Floor 1 - These men have jobs.

 

She is intrigued, but continues to the second floor, where the sign reads:

 

Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids.

 

"That's nice", she thinks, "but I want more."

 

So she continues upward. The third floor sign reads:

 

Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good looking.

 

"Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.

 

She goes to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

 

Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead good looking and help With housework.

 

"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"

 

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads:

 

Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous, help with housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

 

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor, where the sign reads:

 

Floor 6 - You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

 

PLEASE NOTE:

 

To avoid gender bias charges, the store's owner opened a New Wives store just across the street.

 

The first floor has wives that love sex.

 

The second floor has wives that love sex and have money.

 

The third, fourth, fifth and sixth floors have never been visited.

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Canny. :razz:

 

When are you going you big fruit? I'm on the 5th floor btw! :D

Depends what their return and exchange conditions are like. I get bored easily. :(

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Canny. :razz:

 

When are you going you big fruit? I'm on the 5th floor btw! :D

Depends what their return and exchange conditions are like. I get bored easily. :(

 

If my ring shows any signs of having been tampered with then you can't take me back, classes as soiled goods! Not what you wanted to hear I know!

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Canny. :razz:

 

When are you going you big fruit? I'm on the 5th floor btw! :D

Depends what their return and exchange conditions are like. I get bored easily. :(

 

If my ring shows any signs of having been tampered with then you can't take me back, classes as soiled goods! Not what you wanted to hear I know!

 

Floor 5?? He'd be entitled to get a full refund under the Trading Standard laws! :blush:

 

You are entitled to a repair, replacement, partial refund or possibly a full refund, if the goods you have bought are:
  • Not of satisfactory quality
  • Not fit for the purpose
  • Not as described

Spoilt for choice with that lot methinks!

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