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You haven't considered the obvious answer:

Germany looks nice in the summer @Isegrim

I thought Barbie did what it set out to fairly well but it was definitely desperate to tell you how clever it really was. No wonder Fish likes it

Might have mentioned this before but about 15 years ago we were on a Med Cruise for my sister’s wedding. Anyhow, we stopped at Mykonos one day and we were down the harbour bit. My cousin’s (now) husband said to me “what the fuck is that?” I replied “It’s a pelican”. He (being deadly serious btw) replied “fucking hell! I thought it was a dinosaur”. He’s from Sunderland like. Aye, mate. They still have dinosaurs in Greece 👍🏻

One year when I was working abroad, a new kitchen assistant turned up midway through the season, and one of the lads won the “Welcome to France Scuttle” honours. They went off to his tent to do the deed, and within 5 minutes we hear “ Bastard!!! Fuck off, go on get out!!” Lad comes back, grinning like a Cheshire Cat. We ask wtf? ” Ah got her strides off, took one look and asked if it came with garlic or chilli sauce!” Poor lass

Aye, histroically the most unpopular PM since records began.

I bet he regrets that now. The answer is always both.

I noticed Sam Fender samples the "Get off the Metro.... NOW" kid at the start of Howdon Aldi Death Queue. I've been listening a bit to Fender recently as my kids actually love him and it's so much better than listening to Dua Lipa, Harry Styles, Taylor Swift etc. I can't get my Google home hub to play him though. Every fucking time I say "Play Sam Fender" it starts playing ambient background noise of being in a thunder storm, the stupid AI cunt. Must think I'm a cockney.

The soft cunt should consider himself lucky he's getting biscuits, a youth once threw an empty stella bottle and cracked the window at Percy Main metro. I ordinarily would have shit myself but I was on my way to a leaving do I didn't want to attend and my mate had given me a ridiculously laced space cake to "chill me out" which started to take effect a few stops back. Also, he should be glad either lad aren't the "get off the metro" kid as he was fucking nails.

Found Renton's Twitter account.

I'm really confident about this next one: I predict that you will die of syphilis.

Gemmill 30 years ago. "Ha'way man my fellow fan of massive lads. [whisper]. Everton are going down this year marra. Mark me words, put a ton down at 10-1. Like printing money marra".

RTG'dYP

Like why he's got a cock like a bookie's pen?

I used to work at Gus Carter bookies and did the odd shift in Sunderland. I can confirm that they were all this good at betting.

I think this sums it up pretty well.

But you can't deny that Phillips has played in two games.

Well we've always thought you look sufficiently like a prisoner.

Did he try to fuck it and say he was checking if it was injured?

I genuinely believe she is mad.

He did actually manage to Gold Medal the mission a few days later. He was a very charming psychopath from Brum, the following year he ended up running a sex shop in Amsterdam. The tradition out there was to rechristen people with a nickname, there’s folks I knew for 2-3 years without actually knowing their real names. I don’t think Stavros was too pleased with hers, like, but traditions are traditions.

Did you win the bet, marra?

Didn't Howe admit we wanted Kalvin Philips? So clearly he thinks we need a player of that profile.

Big changes coming after today that will change precisely fuck all https://inews.co.uk/sport/football/new-ffp-rules-newcastle-transfers-2891009

I feel like some of you will need this today.

😼

Phillips cost West Ham another goal at the weekend minutes after coming on didn't he? That's two in two for him.

Foden, Rice and Bellingham are miles ahead of any other English CMs this season. Fully expect to see Henderson, Gallagher and Phillips start the first game in Euro24

It's so bat shit that even her actual mates in the tory party have distanced themselves from her. Even Farage more or less said she was fucking mental. Nigel. Farage. If he's telling you to wind it in then you're probably too far gone. She said there were millions of "secret conservatives" that were effectively in hiding because they are scared of what will happen to them if they announce themselves as conservatives. I swear they are trying to convince themselves and the world at large that Labour are the second coming of the Nazis and the right wing red pillers are the persecuted victims this time around rather than it being based on race/religion. It's not just Truss, it's the whole lot of them. They seem to think that attacking immigrants and anything they deem 'woke' will win people over, but seem insistent on avoiding any of the stats that show the more mental they become the more they isolate themselves from their own voters, ultimately losing them by the time the GL comes along. At this rate their manifesto for the GL will be one line: "Just vote for them, we've fucked it"

Puns are Sir Boring, as wykiki's lass would say.

Normal country behaving normally.

He said vaffanculo in an Italian accent, switched to Aussie for the flamin galah then back to an Italian accent when he said 'eh?'

Win the FA Cup and doesn't matter where we finish, a trophy at long last and another European adventure albeit in the Europa league, which is probably the best we can get anyway with a league position.

Do your research vibes from Mr 20 Twitter followers who can’t even get the name of the signing right. Also on one hand he’s saying history repeats itself and then on the other he’s inadvertently saying Howe has learnt from his mistakes and that’s why he isn’t playing a 6? He can get in the fucking sea too along with the rest of the impatient babies

Outstanding work

With a cut and the only evidence is a photo in which Fury looks a few years younger, and the cut is suspiciously in the same spot as the one he got off Wallin. Also, the hypocrisy of the fat cunt crying off a fight with a cut he got in sparring so close to the fight when he gave Haye non-stop shit for the same thing. Bloke is a fraud, and running scared. He'll be done for PEDs again in a few weeks and retire with his "mental health problems" again. ALBERT, ALBERT, ALBERT.