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Wahey!

Aye, but, one of those events was a truly historic momentous event, a true advancement for human kind. The other was just some blokes landing on a space rock.

So English teams won 2/3 last season . There were also two Italian teams in the CL semi finals. In 2019 two English teams got to the final. 2016 Real played Athletico. There are no discernible patterns and it’s indicative of the square root of fuck all

It's his first day back from holiday you gaffer cunt.

What are you doing posting on here? Haven't you got work to be getting on with?

He hasn't been married to a lot of his baby providers tbf. There are a lot of floppy haired cunts throughout our education system, and even more in various hazardous waste bins throughout the NHS

Is it just me that likes that stadium?

Just found out the ballet skirt was invented by the Chuckle Brothers. ...all right, never mind

They’d have to get Exile in to play in the centre of the park.

Border checks. Cancelled. Again. 👇

Aye, holiday ended yesterday, it’ll take 3 yrs just to get the feckin foundations dug at this rate. He can kiss goodbye to his Blob unless he gets stuck in.

its a shame that the FA Cup and to a lesser extent the League Cup don't get a slice of the Premier League money. I think winning the Premier league nets you about 160m and finishing bottom around 100m. Take 5m out of each clubs prize money and give it to the FA Cup winners. 100m for winning the FA Cup would see its star rise again pretty sharpish. You'd see everyone try then. Won't happen though. FYI. The current three-year TV deal is worth £8.36 billion, the domestic deal is £5.136 billion and overseas £3.2 billion. Domestic deal money and overseas deal money are shared differently. The money is divided by three to leave a certain amount each season, while the overseas deal is shared 100% equally between each club. The domestic deal is split 50-25-25. 50% is shared equally, 25% is based on league position, and the other 25% is based on how often the team is on TV.

Turns out the club were quite justified in taking her season ticket.

How man, ffs it'll take 3 years I took grief for pointing it out Cunts

Not really, take your missus for example, as soon as she dives on Callum she inevitably goes down easily.

Was Mystic Keg the nickname manc-mag gave to Stevie (in light of his unpredictable predictions)?

Gary Delaney called, and he'd like his joke back.

Morning all!

I couldnt really care less about the result but that felt like a weirdly abnormal ratio of left footed penalty takers at the end there. Strange like. Hope this isn't a new trend. Lefties taking pens always give me the fear for some unexplainable reason.

Indirectly, the comedy value of CT lying about voting for Corbyn?

it's shocking what has become of the FA cup. it used to be as big a deal as winning the league. better in some ways because the finals were such memorable occasions.

Ouch

My feelings too. Need to change our name to the Eider ducks, or the mallards or something. Because of this I don't see it happening. Everything else about the proposal, including widening the Tyne 3 times and somehow having a floating island on it with cars, seems plausible though.

Absolutely ridiculous. Magpies are not water birds

Ooof!

It's the fact that the whip's spreadsheet records things that should be police matters that's the dodgy thing.

Some consolation in how far we've come. I mean if you had told me 20 years ago that one day i would see a strong Real Madrid parking the bus and time wasting at City I simply wouldn't have believed you. Lots of reasons why last night but at the end of the day we didn't take our chances and there were quite a few. De Bruyne, Foden, Bernado, Haaland all could have won it in normal time. Hopefully we'll come back stronger next year. Oh and Bellingham is a ...... Oh again, all that really matters is stopping the inevitable Klopp love in.

They'll serve EVERYTHING.

Will they at least serve mead on the tall ships?

Improved.. fucking improved IMO.

I did when I saw the pic.

"Get the architect to set up an anonymous twitter account and put a slightly cartoon version of the planned new Tyne stadium to slowly acclimatise everyone for it. Tell him not to include anything to do with the super ocean liner next to it which will be a bar as a nod to the tuxedo princess as we want that to be a surprise." (You heard it here first!!)

I think it’s fuckin ace

The inventors of the ballet skirt thought long and hard about what to call their creation. Eventually they just put Tu and Tu together.

Never mind

Sorry to hear about your loss. 😔

Been reading too much of the Mail probably