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NUFC official statement 'Newcastle United would like to put on record their thanks to Amanda Staveley and Mehrdad Ghoudousi for their input into the club. If any fans are upset, particularly in the boldon area, our doctor has recommended drinking alcohol and listening to 'A different corner' by George Michael and just letting it all out.'

Having both English and Spanish blood I have already prepared my victory speech.

I mean fuck all that. The football has been mind numbingly boring to watch, we’ve scraped through a fair few games by the skin of our teeth against lesser teams and he has nowhere near got the best out of the talent available to him. A better manager could have romped home with that squad, playing good football.

Psychotropic drugs

He's usually just a spactator

Why does his cock look like Livramento?

You're dead inside mate, don't worry about it. Happens to most of us.

"I don't know true managing actually is"

Fuck that, he's still a super limited manager. I call him THE HANDBRAKE. Replace him with someone decent and the handbrake comes off. I hope he wins the tournament and goes out on a high cos he's done loads for the culture of the team, and has really supported the players through some absolute bullshit from fans and media. But he's undoubtedly holding this set of players back. And I understand how ridiculous it sounds to be saying that I want him to win the tournament so he can leave. But I'll not be the only one.

So how come he gets so much abuse on here

I don't hence why I'm a spastic

He has, but he's also ignoring the fact that despite the constant let downs fans had much more of a connection to those other England squads, and at least up until McClaren they entertained the fans with decent football (for the most part). We'd go out on our swords, rather than trying to sneak a win. Let's also not forget that Southgate has still won fuck all - he's only prolonged the misery so far, which is actually a super villain trait IMO. Would you swap the 95/96 season under KK with that same team and season under Southgate if it meant a title win? Nah, fuck that and fuck Pougatch as well, the daft cunt. We're meant to feel something when watching footy other than boredom.

Spain have struggled in some games. They obviously have more flair than us, but Keegan's team frequently had more flair than most and won fuck all. I don't think they will pull our pants down, but they might get our builder's crack showing.

VVD looks like a dad in the summer holidays dealing with his disabled toddler. He knows he's there and he's just about done with his shit.

Do I like that.

"Hello, this is the operator speaking, I'm just putting your joke back through to 1982. Thank you for calling."

It's either that or their normal alternative.... "You fucking what, mate?"

Knowing what we know now, we should have known Kuol would be shite.

viva espana!

It would be a brilliant way to end his tenure. He's got England further in competitions than most of the spuds that are foisted upon the English public, but he's absolutely a safety-first manager. Which would be fine if they had a limited squad, but some of the attacking talent at his disposal (and the paucity of defending talent) should mean they play more on the front-foot. Saka, Foden, Watkins, Toney, Palmer, Bellingham, Gordon, should not be hamstrung by favouring an increasingly static Harry Kane. He deserves more credit than he gets, but definitely deserves the criticism he gets.

It's been fucking shite. Bellingham has been over hyped by himself. Kane is ready for Glue Trippier has had a fucking tonne of shite whilst Walker has got off Scott free. Rice has been shite Yet we're in the final 😂 and I really couldn't care less if we win.

I don't know what we'll be mate, hopefully not a club owned by a 14 year old that's flip flopped about between the 2nd and 3rd divisions for the best part of a decade and has just taken 6 months to employ a failed manager that no fucker outside of lorient has ever heard of. that would be awful.

head spinning stuff on the couple of pages I read on there yesterday. I usually find it quite amusing watching/reading them whipping themselves up in to a frenzy of surreal fantasy where imagination becomes reality in a matter of moments. they've actually become pitifully tragic in their desperation instead. anyway, hold on to yours, it's cast in stone, the saudi's have deemed us a hopeless case and are buying tottenham instead, it'll be done and dusted by lunchtime today.

The Mackem Slayer lost his legs at 19.

Farage couldn’t knock out a wank.

Where's the rest of that post, you Daily Mail editing wanker!

I haven't watched us in the knockout stages at all. I don't care enough about England to commit to a two hour shite game of football. If there was even a glimmer of a chance of entertainment during the games, I'd be watching. If we're incapable of making it entertaining at any point I really don't give a fuck if we win. I'll have the final on on Monday morning because Spain are in it and they're great to watch. England will also be there I suppose.

#deluded

I think this bit is key, she's a facilitator, a deal broker. She's not the one to execute the running of an ambitious football club. That's why we've appointed people like Eales; someone with recent experience of growing a football club from the hinterlands to becoming a genuine force in their league. It's why we had appointed Ashworth, a man who, it transpires, isn't the recruitment guru. He's more the man to ensure all parts of the operation work together towards a common goal. Staveley and Ghodoussi haven't the capital to keep wup with the kind of investments required to springboard us to the next level. Nor do they have the right experience. They'll ride off into the sunset with, I assume, a very healthy payday, the well wishes of a fan base and raised renown in the field.

It's not even like there aren't sufficiently capable leaders (or penalty takers) in the England squad. It would also be something Spain wouldn't expect. The Door and The Norman would expect a pretty easy day against the cinderblock, but Watkins will, at the very least, make them use some energy.

He should start Watkins, but he won't drop his captain. No way.

Nope. The consensus is this means the Saudis have had enough and are selling up

Aye, chin up Renty Baby, reset the clock and go again. Try not to beat yourself up too much, mate.

I will spend the first three weeks in August close to Eddie Howe’s birthplace as almost every year. It will be unbearable if you win it but after tonight I am actually not that bothered as you did well. I do still hope Spain will win it though. Enjoy being in the final after a really poor start to the tournament. Just the tension and excitement is really nice as I can tell you after watching wins and defeats in 82, 86, 90, 92, 96, 02, 08, 14 😉 Honestly, just enjoy it. Maybe it really is your time this time.

No he said the best teams win it and someone said not always though Roy, blah blah blah. That said I was only half paying attention because Roy Keane is a dog nonce, but still.

It’s a bit like Shearer needing players to do his running. When Kane has Muisala, Coman, Sane running off him and feeding him bullets then he will score. He is a lethal finisher. i agree that his style won’t fit many teams though. He’d be shite for NUFC as the press would fail miserably.

The first touch was class so it was anything but textbook Defoe

Roy Keane when England score is hilarious. Just turns away from the screen, and you know he's thinking "Jaysus these cunts will be insufferable now so they will."