adios

Also I'm on a nexus 10 which probably makes things even more difficult?

Same here, except I'd rather be stuck in Hawaii than this fecking hospital bed.

Still prefer Carver to Pardew. He's basically the same calibre but allows the players to get forward more (not that that's saying a lot).

I seriously wonder if he knows how to work out the Maths of the Premier League table.

Yeah, that's fucking shocking. And 6 in 6 is pretty decent? That'll avoid relegation most years I suppose. FFS.

Had to laugh when Pardew subbed the left back, then not to be outdone, Carver sticks on 2.

Terrible match. Sissoko and Perez on a bit of a bad run now. Gouffran and Williamson dogshit.

No way this team gets relegated. Just enough quality (laughs). Also Carvinho will win the Champions' League within 5 years. Taking all bets.

Thought you were retiring to the bath.

Looking forward to watching this for some reason even though it's got awful draw written all over it.

If the 3 serious responses aren't seen as positives, I think we're taking the piss with our expectations.

Sissoko, Janmaat, Perez, Williamson.

Does the fact that you've remained confident about so many things that haven't come to pass not shake that confidence?

Also thought Anita was a bag of shite. Sissoko played one ball onto Cabella's head in the 11th(?) minute that was sublime. He wasn't terrible, but defo not a good game from him.

Ah yeah, there was a lot negative about it, I'm just saying that I go into it expecting fuck all and focus on the bright spots like that.

Sorry, couldn't find the 'Suicidal' option anywhere so couldn't fill it out.

Oh yeah, I forgot about that. Carver took off a defensive midfielder and put on a striker! These are exciting times we are living in gentlemen, mark my words.

Just as a matter of interest, did you cheer when Colback scored? Or have things gotten that bad?

Playing Ireland(?) onside when he seemed be inexplicably taking the scenic route back from the corner flag. He did something in the box too at some point which I can't even remember, but it was the last straw for me. Need a new water carrier.

Yeah, I agree, I had to collect myself from shouting at Williamson for a couple minutes, before I returned to my usual sunny disposition. Honestly, Jo Brand could be managing the team as long as it means Pardew's gone, and I'd still be doing cartwheels.

Williamson feels like the new Ameobi at this point. Every fucking match, it's 'when will we see the end of this cunt?' After his testimonial.

I know not being a miserable bollocks isn't very fashionable around these parts. I don't know how you lot haven't topped yourselves having not learned to enjoy the little things over the past few years.

I actually enjoyed the match. Really liking the look of Cabella. Trying to think who he reminds me of, early C Ronaldo? Fucking frustrating finale but I'll take it if it means humping Pardew on Wednesday. Cup final etc.

Fantastic. Inspirational. Emotional. Infuriating. Thanks for the link.