Smooth Operator

Aye that's the one. We used to go for work days out at York races but no one could ask this kids fatha for fear of cracking up at the sheer reference to horses!

Don't know who you are, but can I just welcome you to the board Newcastle fan right? 13353[/snapback] Aye too right, thanks for the welcome.

I used to reside in both Heaton and it's Higher companion. The higher end was no bother yet Heaton i found was full of arseholes, basically a few charvas who'd walked down from the Byker Wall for some fresh air i reckon. Some c*** tried to kick our back door in when we were all at the match. Steer clear of Balmoral Terrace in Heaton if you can lads, it was feautured on Sky One's Britains Worst Streets, it featured a lad called Criag with a Staffy called Flloyd, biggest tosser i've ever come across, brought shame on the Geordie nation!

I once worked with a bloke who had disowned his son for fiddling with horses, anyone know Leam Lane over Gateshead way where they have a few horses knocking about on public greenery (never known what the fuck all that's about) anyway the police caught him on camera giving the horse a swift 2 hoof shuffle after a tip off. He was sent down "furlong" time for it. Rumour has it his fellow inmates have to "jockey" for position iin the showers to avoid his wondering hands.

A personal favourite of mine i pinched from a friend is for when it'a bit close outside - "I'm sweating like a Palestinian bus driver". Class and topical.