The Fish

Here, @Christmas Tree you can use this website to make it easier; Premier League Calculator (thefishy.co.uk) (No it's not mine, just a co-inkydink)

In my defense, I didn't come up with the joke, it was my wife's. But you're right, it's awful, she's got to go, I'll have tequila.

Maybe they were Mexicans. After all it is League Juan.

We're switching from this to Google Data Studio at work. Also trying to learn enough SQL, that I can make a business case to send me off somewhere to sit exams in it. Which has fuck all to do with accreditation and everything to do with having a jolly on the work dime.

Wife's got it. But, like so many of the fine young men on here, I appear to be immune to it.

I've decided not to get too attached to anyone who was here before the January window. They're all a standard we should want to improve upon. Bruno might become world class, or he might not, but the rest of them are not getting to his level, let alone beyond him.

We're safe, but I'd like to see 7-9pts from the next five games. We're 6pts ahead of Everton in 17th, and 9pts ahead of Watford in 18th. Say we only get 4-5pts from the next five games. Everton have; Burnley (a) Man Utd (h) Leicester (h) Liverpool (a) Chelsea (h) Watford have; Leeds (h) Brentford (h) Man City (a) Burnley (h) Palace (a) Where are Everton going to get the 10-11pts, or Watford the 13-14pts from? I could easily see Everton beating Burnley, then losing the rest and losing heavily, widening our gap to 7-8pts. Watford are a fucking enigma, they could win all of their home games and only lose to Man City and Palace on the road, that would still put them 4-5pts behind us.

Where were they when we were shit?

Just had a look on whoscored.com. It took them 90+ minutes to get past Gillingham who rest in *checks table* 20th position. Prior to that, they drew 0-0 with Lincoln in 18th. Before that an emphatic 2-0 win! (both goals scored after the 80th minute, against rock bottom Crewe). In fact 5 of their last 7 games have all come against sides in the bottom 7. It's not looking great, is it?

spoil sports Probably wise mate

There's not a lack of drivers, it's just taking them longer because they're all enjoying the views of the Sunlit Uplands.

CT man, this is a family website!

Aye, similar for me. Sometime there are no green peppers, other times there's no cherry tomatoes, there was a week or so where you couldn't get a grab bag of Beef flavoured hula hoops for love nor money.

Just a quick point of order, if I was wanting to illustrate how filled with holes something was, and wanted to use a cheese to make that point... I wouldn't use Gruyere. Emmental maybe?

Nate Dogg and Pharoah?

And the rest when they go down. @Gemmill they are going down, right?

Read something that said, for all he's 6'1" he doesn't really impose himself physically and that he loses more than half of his aerial duels. Agree about stats not telling the whole picture, certainly at his age.

No, but the flip of that is that some jabroni says "check out this kid, I think he's great"! I don't disregard having my analysts check out his performance stats. I use stats to assess his performances over time, I use a boots on the ground scout to assess his character, his attitude, his personality. You read the Nowhere Men? It talks about the importance of both approaches and neither is more or less important than the other.

Nah, this is a free hit. After this we've got 4 games where we can get points.

This young player's stats don't blow me away OMG HOW CAN YOU SAY HE'S THE WORST PLAYER EVA. HICKEY ARMY UNITE!! FUCK STATS! ONLY THIS VAGUE TRANSFER RUMOUR SAYING HE'S MINT CAN BE RELIED UPON! Children.

Where did I 'write him off' you plum? Not being blown away, isn't the same as saying he'll never blow me away.

Because you boys are so mean, I had a quick google for scouting reports on Hickey and they seem to say similar to me; he looks like he's got some talent, but he's nowhere near the finished article and there are questions marks over his creativity, low progressive passes, defensive actions and so on.

I also enjoy not reading a post properly and leaping to a conclusion with hilarious consequences.

Hasn't stopped journalists getting to critics of a regime in the past. Some journalists have paid a high price for getting a story in the past mind you.

I'm not writing the lad off, I'm just saying that, some of the key stats for a fullback who's playing regularly in a top division are... uninspiring. Progressive carries or passes are below average or... shocking Tackles, interceptions are poor. xA and Shot creating actions aren't great either. Hard to see, from stats alone, exactly why he's highly regarded.