Penguin

2-0, uh oh.

What they need to do is, hire 11 really really really fit girls, stand them in the dressing room before kick-off and have Shearer say "Right, get 3 points right here tonight, and at full time you can all have a go each on one of these lasses standing here." That should be motivation enough. What do you think?

He'll probably get dibs on a few Man United reserves though to strengthen his side.

Shocking defending, basically said "Have a free header". Well done.

I think Iain Dowie was talking to Rio Ferdinand yesterday to get some advice and tips for Colo

He's just genuinely clueless.

Probably because he'll be playing in a league where the standards are lower...

Should've kept Bramble

£10 million. £10 fecking million.

I wonder who he's gonna take a swing at this time

It'll mean some games on friday nights and midweek leaving the weekends free to go shopping with the missus. Good luck, lads

I suggest they hire Mike Bassett.

I haven't seen that vid, I don't like watching myself on camera.

Those kind of videos bring tears to the eyes. Squeamish, stomach twisting and overall shock.

Relax, Newcastle aren't going down

Steven Gerrard Jamie Carragher Javier Mascherano