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Makom

Ashley out campaign idea - Straight Outta Pennywell, Bitchez.

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General election campaign

This campaign would leverage the press & media attention on the forthcoming election by informing all the mainstream prospective MPs standing in Newcastle area seats that the campaign plans to take out full page ads in the local papers on the Saturday and Sunday before polling day, and would they like to take that opportunity to have their name and perhaps a personal message included in it, to let prospective voters that they stand with them in sympathy over the current plight of NUFC as a club with a fine tradition and proud supporters being owned by someone with zero ambition, zero connection with the fans, and zero sense of their role in the community and zero intention of providing a football club of which the region can be proud of. Should play particularly well with Labour, given their enmity for zero-hours contracts.

Edited by Mako

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Puma campaign

 

This campaign would leverage the fact Puma is the only major club sponsor with any kind of reputation to protect from the damage of being associated with Ashley's reign. Step 1: Contact Puma and request a statement on where they stand regarding their company's brand values and business practices being associated with Ashley's lack of ambition, pile it high/sell it cheap model and use of zero hours contracts. Step 2 depends on the reply - if they reply favourably, then use that in future publicity material. If they reply neutrally or indeed just ignore the request, then stage a couple of high profile protests outside Puma locations (fund a trip to London if necessary), with the aim of getting some negative publicity for Puma, and general publicity for the campaign

Edited by Mako

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Sleeping with the Enemy

 

The sleeping with the enemy campaign (controversial to say the least - not to be attempted half-heartedly or without contemplating all contingencies) - building on the recent goodwill between the two clubs, contact SAFC with a view to them allowing a small group of NUFC fans to attend a designated Sunderland home match in full NUFC clobber, to support their team and protest against Ashley. The point being to highlight the fact that fans find Ashley's approach to running the cub so disagreeable that they would rather support their fiercest rivals than watch any team put out under his tenure. If executed properly (i.e. without making the fans look disloyal or as just glory hunters with absolutely no appreciation financial realities), this particular campaign couldn't fail to achieve national media/press coverage of the worst kind for Ashley as a football club owner.

Edited by Mako

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Financial Times campaign

 

The Financial Times campaign would leverage the fact Ashley is seen as an outsider in the business world, and the ability of the FT to reach all the places prospective new owners reside, far beyond these shores. Step 1: get a quote from the FT on the price of a full page ad. Step 2: set up a kickstarter fund with that as the target. Step 3: once reached, place an add with the banner "For Sale" - then detail all the plus points owning NUFC brings potential owners (most notably the new TV deal). At the bottom, include a message along the lines of "Available at the right price to anyone with the ability to displace the incumbent owner Mike Ashley of Sports Direct, whose lack of ambition and general contempt for the fans and the club, has forced them to place this advert using their own money. Step 4: make sure all the press/media know about the advert, so as to make it a talking point about whether or not Ashley deserves to own the great institution that is NUFC, or whether it isn't time he stepped aside and handed it over to the first person to offer a fair price and was prepared to run it how it should be run.

Edited by Mako

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Inspire the Fans

 

The inspire the fans campaign would primarily be aimed at those supporters who still go to games and perhaps don't think Ashley is all that bad, or if they do, they fear the unknown should he sell up, to change their minds and start getting behind the campaign for the long term good of the club. This will involve getting some of those fans who have long ago decided not to attend matches, to use that time to stage protests on Strawberry Place before, during and after matches. A key part of this will be to identify a talented graphic artist within the movement, and ask him to craft a couple of really good images to go with a couple of hard hitting slogans directed solely at fans, to be presented on banners made as large as practicable. Using imagery associated with better times, it should prompt them to seriously think about whether or not they agree NUFC is a club which should be satisfied with being a selling club, being not interested in the cups, or being satisfied with finishing 10th as an acceptable season for NUFC with all the resources it currently has at its disposal. Participants should identify themselves with appropriately messaged T-shirts, and should be properly coached not to stray from the central message of this particular campaign, should a journo stick a microphone or a camera in their face hoping for a quote which reinforces some negative stereotype of an NUFC fan.

Edited by Mako

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I did hesitate to include this idea, because it is pretty out there, and in all likelihood would lead to whoever attended being accused of being traitors. But at the end of the day, at some point you have to contemplate thinking the unthinkable if you really want change and everything else has failed.

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Aye, try convincing the safety officer at the Knuckle Dragger's Flat Pack that letting 5 lads in Black and White stand in the retards end and protest about NUFC being run badly is a good idea.

I reckon you could count on 6 fingers the number of people who think this is a good idea.

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It's also in pretty poor taste to use the fund raising for John Alder and Liam Sweeney as the starting point of your little wind up.

But then, a lifetime of blue pop will do that to your taste, won't it?

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It's a genuine proposal. It would have to be agreed with SAFC, so they could sort out stewarding etc. I see no reason why the locals would even try to start anything if they knew we were there for (imho) the right reasons.

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Some people just like to go out, have a few beers, watch a game of football and have a good old fashioned vent.

So why subject yourself to an abject performance in a glorified advertisement hoarding?

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Some people just like to go out, have a few beers, watch a game of football and have a good old fashioned vent.

And then there's the likes of you

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Some people can only find happiness in causing other people misery.

 

I think an inspiring banner with an appropriate slogan would go a long way to waking those fans who think this regime isn't all that bad out of their stupor.

 

I don't think a bed sheet with 'Cockney Mafia' spray painted onto it does anything at all except make us look like idiots. Nee offence Monkeys Fist, if I'm treading on a nerve there.

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Merged

 

 

 

 

WITH SUSPICION

I'd like to add a sprinkling of grated dairy products, and pair it with a lovely Panda Pop Framboise Bleu.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whilst fucking my sister.

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Can the thread title now be changed? It doesn't make any sense now the ideas have been merged. It should just read "Ashley Out campaign ideas" if they're all going to be in one thread.

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